random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Super Mario Brothers]

Enjoy being shanked by dog fighters,extorted by backyard breeders or neglectors and getting raped by cat killers.

 

[Speedrunner]

Has someone made a fart-based changed fangame yet?

 

[Solid Snek]

I've never had a female express interest in me but I'm just thinking about things logically

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

You'd think someone who spent years as the town bike would be able to write better smut.

No guy starts sexualizing MewTwo at 25.

They don't seem to understand that there's a difference between spanking your girlfriends ass and fucking a drugged animal at the hotel where the furry convention is.

 

[JustSomeDong]

When you amphetamine goon so hard it morphs you into a lebanese arms dealer.

 

[Aunt Carol]

you can only begin to fathom the sheer amount of trans Goro Majima fanfiction on AO3

She might be paying almost $30 for leaf water but she's gonna be sipping it next to a jar of toenail clippings.

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

I hope aliens don't exist because I'm going to be embarrassed to have to tell them I'm from Earth.

Just. Fuck. Off.

Clown world honks onwards, to what end I don’t know, but probably an itchy one.

 

[Dr. Butt]

I ate an entire box of ice cream sandwiches Saturday and I am proud of it
I see your reactions I'll do it again too

 

[Metamorpho]

The first Bubsy is pretty good actually. I refuse to elaborate any more.

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

Purple drank is the tits. I'll beat yo bitchass for that comment.

 

[The Great Citracett]

 

[Dr. Butt]

As a woman on the internet since the 90s, I've been misgendered pretty much on a daily basis most of my life.

 

[JustSomeDong]

I didn't even ask the AI for the happy merchant hands

 

[Dr. Butt]

Noooo. They cannot have the onion. It is the prince of root vegetables.

 

[Dr. Butt]

I want my dick back.

Sauce:

View attachment 7936225

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

You know society is fucked when even furries could see the current year catastrophe coming a full decade in advance.

 

[Potato Burrito]

Even in full girlmode with a purse etc everyone calls me he/him and sir

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

Imagine your ancient ancestors find out that instead of hunting the buffalo, you want to fuck the buffalo

 

[Dr. Butt]

trannywagon of horrors

"Kiwi Farms".

 

[Aunt Carol]

"Raah! Me like guns! Me shoot, me kill! Me run alpaca ranch! Me become tenured English professor!"

Think of my kids! Would they rather have a dead dad or a live pervert?

(I wish they still made Bionicle)