random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

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I'm afraid orniphrenology was dismissed as quackery a hundred and sixty years ago, sir.


It's the type of lie a 7th grader tells at the lunch table after watching the latest star wars movie and daydreaming about the lightsaber fight scenes. It's not anything any sane person would willingly do.

I guess the lesson here, is don't show your girlfriend pictures of "neo vaginas".

Your waiter should whip out his dong (with his right hand) and push it into your "piping hot soup" balls deep to show you what a bitch you are.

I'd rather just put him above a water tank and play "Dunk the Retard."

Closest that greaseball fuck will ever get to a bath.

What a baffling physique. Rail thin but with an unmistakably male gut, massive hands, and a nascent eunuch hunch. He’s shaped like a Despicable Me character.

I still can't believe they've managed to cancel representation of a meteorological phenomenon that's existed for billions of years before humans.

They aren't even going after listeners of Trump-friendly country music bands. Instead, online leftists have this weird obsession with proving that the most vote-blue, cat-loving, pumpkin spice Live-Laugh-Love basic bitch white women in existence, i.e. Swifties, secretly want to cyanide Jews and gypsies.

Dang, just found out that some random age gap romcom shoujo manga that I read the first volume 12 years ago was finally fully translated. And after reading it I can assure you that it wasn't worth the time at all.

✨Hey, nigglies✨

By time of his death, he looked ill. Drugs and Yoko had worn him down.

It very clearly conveys the rank order of mascness of colours
brown > black > green > purple > blue

This is why when I have a black t-shirt on I am compelled to yell 'faggot fairy' to every man with a blue shirt I see on the street.

Holy shit, this is like a where's Waldo of "Can you find all the blasphemies in this picture?" and I'm not talking about the actual troons.
 
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