Disaster Florida Man vs Irma Megathread

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http://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/article171291337.html

Florida is about to get raped by the largest hurricane it's ever seen. I have unwaivering faith in Florida man's cockroach like ability to survive against all odds. Godspeed FL kiwis.

Update:

Evacuation orders underway
CWCchange said:
Monroe County (Keys) is under evacuation order. Miami-Dade County is likely to order South Dade and Miami Beach evacuations tomorrow.

http://www.miamiherald.com/news/weather/hurricane/article171343362.html
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Update 2:

The hurricane is so severe it's reading as an earthquake.
Ariel said:
https://www.usatoday.com/story/weat...evices-designed-detect-earthquakes/634419001/
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repentance said:
Shit's getting serious in the islands. Barbuda got hit a few hours back and all contact with the island has been lost.
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I can only imagine it must be horrible. I hope Barbuda's residents are doing okay.
The Kraken said:
Bit of an update for the fam:

Gas stations are out of fuel, most stores seem to be out of water bottles, and, the ones that do have some, the lines are wrapped all the way to the back of the store. Some schools and universities have canceled class, but it looks like most of 'em are gonna wait till the last second, as usual, to cancel classes so those who wanna evacuate can ('cuz fuck students amirite). My campus is eerily quiet this morning, was able to actually get a parking spot on time, and can tell that people are already leaving.

It's actually funny as fuck being able to tell who is a seasoned Florida Man and who is a rookie. Go to a store and see who is loading up on the essentials, and who is loading up on beer and booze. I'm not too worried. Ain't my first rodeo. Live in a very sturdy location, and most of the old trees have already been knocked over by previous storms. Tons of drainage, so flooding isn't an issue. Worst case is that I'll be outta power for a bit, honestly. Despite all the stereotypes and lovely stories you hear about us, Floridians are generally well-prepped for a storm. I'mma ride this one out, see how it goes. Will provide pictures of any substantial damage I may see. If I die, I want a KF funeral in the highest honor.

Have my tombstone engraved "Newfag ate shit."
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I am assuming you live in Florida right?

Yeah, that is bull that there are schools and universities penalizing students for escaping a potentially deadly storm that will hit as a Category 4 or 5. That said, it is good to hear that Floridians are well prepared for any storm that comes through.
 
FUCK! My direct family is in Florida for vacation.
 
Knowing the many retirement communities in Florida, they always place those in top priority for rescue efforts and restoring power along with hospitals, police stations, and the like. My mom knows this because she's been a RN for 40 years.
Magique said:
FUCK! My direct family is in Florida for vacation.
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Have you talked to them about prepping for the storm?
 
Was visiting family down here. Flight supposed to leave on Saturday. Lol good joke. Evacuating today up to TN in an RV. Pray for my soul.
 
The Great Chandler said:
Florida seems doomed already. They never antacipated a major hurricane in about a decade, which lead to a population boom of snowbirds and housing bubblers. You guys aren't wrong about it ending in a disaster.
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Not really. The last hurricane outbreak 12-13 years ago was at the height of the bubble, and enough time until it popped and the economy crashed allowed most places to recover, thankfully. It took until about 2012-2013 for the economy to recover, as with most the country.
 
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Pina Colada said:
Knowing the many retirement communities in Florida, they always place those in top priority for rescue efforts and restoring power along with hospitals, police stations, and the like. My mom knows this because she's been a RN for 40 years.

Have you talked to them about prepping for the storm?
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Which is bullshit, they should be prioritizing everyone else other than Boomer trash.
 
Super Smash Bros. Fan said:
I can only imagine it must be horrible. I hope Barbuda's residents are doing okay.I am assuming you live in Florida right?

Yeah, that is bull that there are schools and universities penalizing students for escaping a potentially deadly storm that will hit as a Category 4 or 5. That said, it is good to hear that Floridians are well prepared for any storm that comes through.
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Yup, Florida Man. Got a buddy that goes to UCF (the Arizona State University of the southeast) and he's telling me they, in an announcement, instead of announcing campus closing, moved the football game to Friday instead of Saturday. I mean, I love me some ball, but holy fuck. The storm won't be quite here by then, but some of the winds definitely will be. Want to evacuate, but also are on the football squad? That sucks, you're gonna play in front of a crowd of literally nobody instead. Also, they're offering some sort of seminar to "help" prep students for the storm. Basically, it's like "Hey, here's how to prepare yourself for the storm that we're not letting you prepare for."

The schools that haven't canceled yet are waiting until the absolute final second to do anything. Just like last year with Hurricane Matthew. They'll lose money if they shut it down. That's all colleges care about, money. Fuck me if anyone believes they generally care about their students. Just look at all the FL Universities and State Colleges that haven't done jack, even though we've seen this storm brewing and approaching for an ample amount of time. All about the Benjamins, baby.

On a side note, though I know it's a bit fucked up, I do feel relieved when a storm slams into the Caribbean Islands and Puerto Rico first. Can weaken a storm significantly if everything goes right. Or wrong.
 
21273724_1312541125539381_1542293683848061765_o.jpg

LMAO
 
Just got off the phone, my folks are currently evacuating right now and they are stuck in USA. I hope they will be okay.
 
After checking TWC a few times since this morning, I hear that Irma may weaken a bit once it reaches southern Florida- key word: may. Also, the full moon is tonight, so if it starts to wane this coming weekend, residents may be able to dodge a bullet of receiving the worst of it. We can only keep hoping.
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^It's an umbrella term for the island which consists of Haiti and the Dominican Republic.

In other words, it's a shithole.
 
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