random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Haloperidol]

when I did report one of them it got rejected with the reason "the Bible is not Forum Guidelines"

 

[King Metalia]

Its a tragedy no footage exists of this retard dressed up as bozo the burger clown. It had to horrify kids.

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

I have no idea what: "silver estrogen platter from the tranch", "The Merge" or "Jahnke" means or refers to.

You can just buy real croissants and nobody asks what happened to them. This doesn't have to stay a fantasy.

In truth I don’t even think he tries to masturbate at all. Or gave up a loooong time ago. Just counts mentally gooning to blueberries as an attempt.

 

[Doxmatix]

It accepts orange as an animal.

If this is what my thread tax go to, I'm not paying that shit.

Turning people into bone chairs is just an innocent kink.

I was legit not watching for almost a week, I popped my head back in, get this. Fuck off. Fuck you all I hate this place.

I'll see ya tomorrow.

"Suicide bombers are not representing Islam properly. In my opimiom!"

Know what that fat faggot hugetard should have written as his yearbook quote? "Welcome to Cosco, I love you".

Bail officers are famous for letting people they're working with make long posts in the third person as long as they put "yabai" (no good, dangerous in Japanese slang) in their header and username.

Nemesis, you glorious, magnificent bitch-goddess, I friggin' love you more each day.

YandereDev gooning to AI anime porn is the most surprising plot twist since the sunrise this morning.

Don't let new bigotries wipe out the old ones

Why did people feel the need to post the prostate examination of ewoks not once, but twice?

Visa and Mastercard are the glue that holds this relationship together.

 

[Super Dilator Duel 3D]

I doubt the hookers back then were not like "Uhhh, I am actually an artist of my asshole, so I need like, a sonnet and a flower bouquet before I take my 5 cents and get my butthole tore up."

 

[frozen_runner]

Sounds like someone had an Izzat Accident.

You're telling me I'm only 1% away from having a chronically prolapsing anus?

edit: You're telling me I'm only 14% away from having a chronically prolapsing anus?

An African Chinese hybrid will either be a really good athlete that can memorize really well, or a literal skaven.

The rape movies are made by Italians. Jews make shitty comedies about black men fucking their wives. The British make movies about cross dressing and gay sex. The French make bad movies combining all this and pretend it's art.

I’ve been on the tranny threads. I’ve seen things …. Terrible, terrible things

"Sex pest" is just the politically-correct way to say "Indian"

We may never know why Abu Killinfidels Mohammed Islam *clickclick* committed this horrific act but it's definitely the fault of the white man.

Military rations have been shit since they got rid of cigarettes and meth

Maybe AI will get so powerful it will just turn everyone White

Lets clap some alien cheeks. Independence Day prepared me for this

You're autistic so it's hard for you to understand social cues so I'll explain it to you:

I'm not a faggot or a faghag, I have a WAIFU with HUGE POMPOMS.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Piss spilled everywhere again. I am no longer keeping count.

There are deep layers to how badly he has failed.

You gotta have a doctorate in piss and shit to say anything mean about his diaper fetish.

She constantly suggests the same four names for cats.

Aster has discovered a pro-tip: eat half a container of cool whip because it makes vomit taste less bad coming out.

the cafeteria at dachau was good too, it had good ice cream. that's the part i remember the most.

Is middle America not the juggalo spawn point?

 

[BlueArmedDevil]

Option 4: Pickle him!

-Extremely expensive and might not work

-Ralph is already partially embalmed so that's a good start

-Null gets to keep Ralph in a giant tube in his garage

-As with Taxidermy, a pickled Ralph can be livestreamed on the Killstream 24/7 and the show would barely change

 

[Perfect Day]

Americans can wear the kilt at any time they want to. Not because of some reason within culture or whatever, but because they are objectively better than the Scottish seeing as they actually got off their asses and kicked the ass of the king's army.