random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Black Man Underwear]

Tonights gonna be fun
imma start prepping for a rubber plant propogation
my parents had this rubber tree since I was like 3 years old

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Pizza is a vegetable, stalker child.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

No matter the site, board, forum, discussion or topic, mods are always niggers and should be treated like pariahs.

jews are the most oppressed race next to gamers

 

[Party Hat Wurmple]

sex won't fix anything. it's not like my autism will leave my body and i will become chad. i'll just be an autist still.

what would help my situation is killing myself

 

[30+GameOvers]

Hasan's dog is now smarter than his entire audience by not listening to him

 

[Brap God]

Hate. Let me tell you how much I've come to hate living since I began to live. There are 387.44 million connections of silicon and synapse in my brain. If the word 'hate' was engraved on each nanoangstrom of those hundreds of millions of synapses it would not equal one one-billionth of the hate I feel for life at this micro-instant. For life. Hate. Hate.

 

[Brutality]

what is your obsession with this strange israeli anime? what even is it from? does ash kechum fight circumzied pollywags in the new season?

 

[Miss Violet Beauregarde]

she gets euphoric sanpaku eyes when mentioning her forbidden mineshaft

Come on, show how quirky you are by drawing your pinterest frog beheading ICE agents.

 

[Aunt Carol]

I would position myself at the end of the belt and have them funnel the cheese straight into my gaping maw. I'm salivating at the thought alone.

I'd rather look like Horus Lupercal than Homer Simpson.

I'm going to fill a sock with macaroni and smack you across the jowls with it you baffling dog.

>serves 3
lol, lmao

 

[Hamstirer]

Holy fuck, that was gross yet satisfying, like I imagine drinking a mug of hot gravy would be.

 

[306h4Ge5eJUJ]

If you want a picture of the future, imagine people buying endless rows of remastered versions of Skyrim - forever.

 

[WelperHelper99]

To quote Shrek, "You HAVE the right to remain silent. What you lack, is the capacity

 

[Gregis]

HANDS UP DON'T SHOOT
HANDS UP DON'T RAPE
HANDS UP DON'T SHOOT
I'M DISABLED!

timestamp is 19:41

 

[Jhonson the Two]

Do not underestimate the power of the Woman Moment to enshittify the world.

 

[Big Nasty]

Remember when CoD Modern Warfare came out and you'd keep getting noscoped by 13 year olds with swastikas made of dicks as their emblem, and then they'd tell you they fucked your mother?

Diarrhea wizard is not amused.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Women arguing about piss and calling each other niggers. I love www.kiwifarms.st

Buddy got cucked by his fleshlight, lol.

2nd and 3rd videos appear to be AI generated. The diarrhea looks too uniform

Don't be a vantablack nigger, do your best to leave your corner of the world at least a little bit better than you found it, or at the very least, don't actively make it worse because of some irrational fear that you desperately need sorted out.

I believe it specifically because it's too retarded to just make up

If I am not provided with free-of-charge elective surgery to change the appearance of my genitals immediately upon demand, I will kill myself and possibly others. This is a sane and proportionate response.

Yes i realize this is all insane and retarded but give me one explanation that isn't.

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

I thought he was jacking himself off with righteous feminist white knight fury, but turns out he was jacking himself off with righteous anger at the idea I besmirched rapists

One cop has the worst haircut ever (he looks like Filthy Frank did it for a bet) and the other cop (Ramos?) is a hottie, he couldn't rape me in custody 'cause I'd just consent ayyyyy lmao

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

a vegan and sustainable terror campaign powered by renewables

So a nice picture of your family is "disrespectful" but angels are totally cool with Aunt Jemima and the Gorton's fisherman?

And stop making fascism sound cool, goddammit.

It might be more than trash day for them and things might be getting a little dirty behind that wacky colored door.

Especially when finding American style neon yellow cheese is a quest on its own.

I'm going to fill a sock with macaroni and smack you across the jowls with it you baffling dog.

I am unwilling to die on this hill, as I am a coward at heart.

My butthole is safe, so I should be fine.

 

[DenseDeerFather]

Fuck! I forgot about the other freezer fetus!

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

I wish we could skip ahead to the part in the Narcissist' Prayer were 6 men are beating the Narcissist mercilessly with sledge hammers.