random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[OvercookedBacon]

WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU THINK IT WAS GONNA BE? IT'S LITERALLY TITLED "LUST PENIS".

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Of course the wrestling avatar is a gay retard.

God I cant stand the arrogance of these fucking turd goblins.

(because in India, only gay men have hygiene)

I used Tinder for a month, and the weirdest interactions that came out of that were from jeets. One added me on Instagram and kept begging me to pee on him and kept offering money for it. When I'd tell him no, he'd try to compromise by offering to pee on me instead.

 

[Uh Oh Stinky]

This would be a hilarious copypasta if it weren't posted by someone who actually fucks dogs.

Heckin wholesome if he starts sticking with the clown fart porn instead of molesting his nieces.

I’m not shaming anyone for cranking one out but when you set up A DEDICATED MASTURBATORIUM IT IS A PROBLEM.

Tragic. Imagine wanting to become your 'true self' and you choose to look like Gypsy Rose Blanchard as a kid.

I feel like Jon at the end of that Garfield robot chicken sketch where after Garfield dies Jon gets another cat to feed lasagna to

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

I can talk with eastern european or older women just fine. No I am not CWC so that's not a romantic buff.

 

[Shartavius]

I am unironically excited to see how he "investigates" chicken salads.

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

Talkin Trash and Makin Sense: the Value of Abusive Ad Hominem Arguments in African American Argumentation

Whew I'm glad we don't exist, thanks for clearing that up redditors, really takes a load off of my mind.

 

[Law]

You're seeing the effects of the gay rodeo clown genes.

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

I personally find Hillary Clinton inspirational. But, that's another story.

 

[frozen_runner]

If there were a newborn, but highly intelligent alien who was able to converse in English on this thread, how would you rank and explain the crimes of the RLM sphere?

I know everybody talks about how Redditors are faggots, but goddamn, Redditors are such faggots.

Thank you for this meal of cringe.

World peace cannot occur until the French are scourged from the Earth.

This thread has given me a mental illness

Can't wait for the KF episode as well. I hope I'm not played by Pedro Pascal.

Kiwifarms project to build a functioning golden toilet on my grave and make it play "La Cucaracha" when you flush it.

I fucking hate Science

 

[S.C.U.D.]

As a trans woman, I am no longer mentally ill.

Source

 

[a kiwifarms user]

I never liked her stuff (too weird and extreme), but she used to be absolutely adorable. What a shame.

And, uh... not being able to control her bowels. That's unfortunate as well

 

[Meat Target]

We're out here in an actual Niggerpocalypse and trying to survive while you complain about having to fiddle with your goon helmet.

 

[Maldavius Figtree]

my billionaire boyfriend is a werewolf and only has sex with me while in dog form

 

[a kiwifarms user]

I pointed that out in the YouTube drama sub and got downvoted.

Part of me wants to make my first thread about this tard but then I realize I'd have to watch his content and do research and I'd rather not. God his energy is just the worse.

 

[Gentlebastard]

I'm not convinced his penis still works.

You're seeing the effects of the gay rodeo clown genes.

Someone's mad mommy wouldn't let him stay in his goonercave on Sundays.

Whew I'm glad we don't exist, thanks for clearing that up, really takes a load off of my mind.

Soon she'll be so radicalized that she says things like "free speech includes speech you might not like".

Step up your french fry game, pleb, and maybe i'll redpill you on tendies

 

[Slideshow Bill]

You can say "Jews" on this website.

me chinese

me play joke

Me steal your entire company's trade secrets and sell them to the competition because I'm a CCP plant and you were fucking retarded to put me in a position where I had access to privileged information, you absolute goddamned idiot.

I don't drink Tenderness Whisky, I only drink Nigga Whisky from the Hood.

Because God created the Earth 6, 000 years ago, not On the eighth Day God created Aliens. That's why.

 

[InJailOutSoon]

Imagine if Zuko was to speaking his uncle going like, "Helloooo, we're fire nation, we're all shitty!"

 

[Cnidarian]

If redditors don't like you, you're probably a sane and readonable person

 

[a kiwifarms user]

it is no longer a Caesar's salad when it has ranch dressing

Yes I know that's not one of the more bombastic ones but some of the current quotes you see at the top of the site are funny for being very subdued. Or maybe that's just me.

 

[Rotollo 2]

"I don't want to see a woman beat a dude because it makes me fantasies about futa on male every time.''