random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Gentlebastard]

Right at the beginning of Black Widow, there is a flashback to Natasha Romanov and her sister as children. There is a whole moment in that flashback which is supposed to be dramatic and moving, where her sister drops her My Little Pony toy.

But it's specifically a My Little Pony toy from My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic, which came out in the 2010s and had a completely different art style from the period appropriate incarnations of My Little Pony.

And it's the most irritating thing fucking ever to me, because the only reason I fucking immediately noticed it was because there was an embarrassing and disturbing amount of young men online in the 2010s who were seemingly completely unable to contain the fact that they really, really, really wanted to have sex with cartoon horses.

It's not actually possible to deny that Patrick is very fat and very gay. Both my phone and the forum software refused to post this until I amended my post to reflect the truth.

Just rotten fruit from a poison tree, wasted in any use away from the front lines of some territorial skirmish in which incendiary weapons in violation of UN protocol are used.

Patience, a cow will moo without prodding given enough time.

It really should be a case study on how someone can be so aggressively confident in being so provably wrong.

I'm gonna have to loiter outside the half hovel holding up a boombox playing that Dilemma song from the early 00s to try and serenade him at this rate if I want to put my wicked plans to pork the pig into action, lest Leslie beat me to it with her smooth talk and plant her flag in the fag via a crisco greased strapon

God has a great sense of humor. (Remember, God gave us Terry Davis so that he could use temple os to read the farms)

 

[General Emílio Médici]

I never thought i would power-level for PPG but, here we go.

That's some extremely specifically timed sodomy. Wake up babe, its 5:30 I gotta plumb your fart-box!

The mindset of "X is doing something terrible that also hurts me but look how much it's triggering those Y people!!!" has done irreparable damage.

My source is the ghost that tells me things

 

[HyperboreanRightsActivist]

Real MAGA PatriQts only watch interracial porn with a white guy and a black woman, just as the founding fathers intended! Don't believe me? Ask Thomas Jefferson.

 

[CaddestSlown]

“We are here to help. Give me a handjob if the cartels are making you act like a retarded whore”

Fapfapfapfap

It's either faggot North Korea or Christian Taliban, no exceptions.

 

[neger psykolog]

"Share this page".

Yes, let me share a website called "rape farms". That's as stupid as adding a "share this" button to porn

 

[Maki Harukawa]

"i have experience in troll fighting"

 

[Spectate]

i was diabetic as a kid and always enjoyed watching her to feel better so enjoy the wave of nostalgia!

 

[Maniacal Foreigner]

hos who show their assholes for the price of a combo meal at Wendys

 

[monstrous bubo]

the Jewish pooner with a piss fetish and who managed to scare away a Pajeet in six weeks

 

[Loris Yeltsin]

I'm looking for a new lizard to adopt. I accidentally sat on my last lizard, who was like a son to me.

 

[Sheogorath]

Besides, seppuku is Japan's national pass time after hentai and upskirt photography

Lolicon and shotacon are symbols of freedom and the triumph of imagination

Little kids are like time-displaced babylonian emperors who haven't adapted to modern civilization yet

 

[Spectate]

next time say im late to my face it legit my first post and your already tearing me down with a negative score

 

[Gentlebastard]

Bonus points because they wear a diaper

They think you’re a chump for trying to give them a carrot, so just hit them with a stick until they hit retard integer overflow. That way, either they’ll stop being retards or retard themselves into irrelevance.

If it wouldn't be lolcow tipping, it would be funny if someone convinced him that bible black was a wholesome christian anime

Not a great idea to be getting in duels when you're that big of a target.

Why the fuck is the 4th tallest statue in the United States of America a monkey demon in Texas?

What the fuck is wrong with her tits?

He is the best father to his daughter that he can be: no father.

The Lord works in mysterious ways, but somehow everything works how it is suppose to: the Seas for the fishes, the Earth for Men, the Sky for the birds, and mortifying online ignominy for Patrick.

 

[The Last Stand]

From @Forsaken Wanderer

TOUCH GRASS BRO JUST TOUCH GRASS. IGNORE THAT ALL WILDLANDS AND FARMLANDS ARE BEING DEMOLISHED TO MAKE WAY FOR ENDLESS TINY HOUSES FOR THE MILLIONS OF PEOPLE FLOODING INTO OUR COUNTRIES EVERY YEAR WHO GET THE HOUSES FOR FREE THROUGH BLACKROCK AND GOVERNMENT GRANTS PAID FOR BY US, WHILE WE THE NATIVES CAN'T EVEN AFFORD TO BUY A HOUSE DESPITE THEIR BEING MORE HOUSES THAN INSECTS IN EVERY ONCE RURAL AREA NOW. OH I'LL GO TOUCH THE GRASS THAT SOME FUCKING INDIAN HAS GONE TO THE TOILET ON. I'LL GO TOUCH THE GRASS THAT HAS BEEN SPRAYED WITH ALL SORTS OF POISONS. I'LL GO BREATH IN THE CONSTANT NOISE POLLUTION OF SIRENS AND DUFF DUFF DURKA DURKA MUSIC. WOW IT'S SO GREAT TO LIVE IN A GLOBOHOMO WORLD

 

[NOT Sword Fighter Super]

There's a reason why nobody calls Bluey a loli or Cailou a shota

 

[CEO of Gay]

Anominous's Law: If you point out a grammatical error in someone else's post, God immediately curses you and you are guaranteed to have one in in your own post.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

“I will avenge you, Denis Hof!”

Original source

 

[CallmeCicada]

should have been an S-tier (S stands for Sneed)

 

[|o|]

Shameless drunk self bump from keno chat “I haven’t been here for too long and I don’t even care if I’ve discovered what KF is fully about. I just love seeing my niggas grow”

 

[joebobmurphy]

Goldmine from Russhole

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