random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[CaddestSlown]

The final straw was when they discovered he snorted his grandmother's ashes to "feel closer to her".

 

[I Hate The Disabled]

Ahhh yes, the stone age cavemen and their famous gasoline generators.

 

[Mind Goblins]

Greetings everyone. I'm magistrate Judge Jared Bennet and let's talk about rule 34 done right.

 

[BirdUp]

I am a porn addict, but I have standards.

 

[Dagoth AMOGUS]

 

[Slideshow Bill]

Trump won the erection

That typo is going nowhere sunshine.

WELL WELL WELL.... LOOKS LIKE THE NIGGER ALARM STRIKES MIDNIGHT

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Keep being your nasty bitter selves and we will continue to wololo normies to our side.

Who is Harold?

And for your pleasure, here's a drawing of Razörfist punching a Nazi

I don't know why i find this funny. Its so fucking stupid.

 

[DickMain]

This is the dumbest shit i've read today

How come does Jimmy kept being such a massive faggot is a consistent milestone to me.

(I'm sorry but I had a stroke reading this and laughed)

 

[Mound Dweller]

You're the ones putting feelings over facts. I'm vastly intellectually and morally superior to anyone I've encountered on here and you're threatened by that.

 

[BirdUp]

Be virtuous, get married and procreate.

Edit: I forgot about the genitalia.

 

[Oliver Onions]

My parent's actual concern was that I was trans...suspiciously.

 

[Syzyg]

I also do not have some "rot pocket" I have a vagina like any other woman out there with the exception of it being a trans one.

 

[Cats]

During my ongoing trip, I acquainted a Vietnamese gentleman that looks just like Josh

 

[Gentlebastard]

When he says 'You Will Never Be A White' he's a hero to lumpenintelligensia and the powers that be.

When I say 'You Will Never Be A Woman', I'm a bigot and have hate-crimed men in dresses.

Make it make sense.

What else would you expect from the mind of a New Zealander?

No mechanical elf, this is my own ego. You have been advised many times not to try and kill it. Enjoy samsara.

I can't even come up with a shitpost lampooning this statement. This might actually be the dumbest thing I've ever read.

If autism is cured, will we cease to exist?

They are showing the court their ass and from what I have seen courts really do not enjoy seeing your ass.

I really hope he does go up on the stand and gets put under severe cross-examination. It's just a spergout and possible contempt of court charge waiting to happen.

 

[Joe Dough 68]

make me some more clout joshy

Source, from the Bluesky thread.

 

[Drip Torch]

Im not an meme

 

[BirdUp]

itd be pretty neat if chris throat is slit and then immediately sewn back and hes bleeding and crying but he isnt dead. then i punch him in his fat nose twice and kick him in the head and hes still crying but he isnt dead. then i tape barb's left femur, ribcage, and ankle skin to chris' chest and set his arms on fire. then i nailgun him to a heavy wooden board and pretend that hes dead and i ignore him for a few minutes and then he calls for help and i retaliate by shoving burnt candles down his throat.

OMG gaiz dis is liek, totally original kay

liek rlly originl, yo

hers my plaaaaannnnnnnnn!!111111!!1!111111!1!1!11


We bash Barb's skull in with a rock while Chris is away with his sweetheart and write "Fags Get Out" on the wall in her blood.

Today I plan on making a post online in which I claim to hold certain beliefs, whilst simultaneously espousing the entirely opposite belief within reality. It is a rather clever yarn to pull on unsuspecting members of the online community, you see, because they will read my covertly insincere post and believe that I hold some ridiculous or foolish notion when, in fact, I do not. They may even suspect that I am below a certain level of average intelligence. Meanwhile, I will be enjoying the knowledge that it was nothing but a successful ruse.

 

[The Judean People's Front]

"Basically today was a shitshow, and we were completely not prepared" - Liz Fong-Jones

 

[Gog & Magog]

I can only assume his addled brain contains pieces of the memory of himself training his kids to say "mommy and daddy and second mommy and second daddy didn't do any cocaine, and what is cocaine, I don't even know what drugs are, also if we did do drugs it was someone else's fault."

 

[Buttigieg2020]

Being Ass raped to death by a monster isn’t gay. It adds to the horror.