random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[CobraPlissken]

untrained employees were given the chance to deal with their anger toward men by cutting off penises during surgical procedures

 

[a kiwifarms user]

Look when you're still constipated in both buttholes you've gotta get creative.

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

anyway I love mpreg yaoi

 

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

@NaggotFigger raped me

 

[Paul Revere Pantry Raider]

That Tarl thread is fucking golden.

I know she's white, but the White Women Cooking thread is dead as hell, and with all those cinnamon-sugar shakers, she's basically a spiritual nigger anyway.

Whatever your ridiculous fantasy is, to put lipstick on the pig that is your sordid life.

Most people waste their 20s on worthless degrees, not their 30s. But you wasted your precious youth on Tarl Fucking Warwick instead, so now you're terminally behind. Death Valley Days, straight ahead! By the time you get your shit in a stack you're going to be in your 40s, single, childless, and still grinding your teeth about the gay pirate that dumped you. Congrats.

To clarify: Have you ever performed sex work, cammed naked, put any object in your vagina or anus in a performative nature in exchange for goods, money or services?

 

[JustSomeDong]

everyone go check your basements for pygmys and report back

 

[Potato Burrito]

Looked like the cyclops version of a giga Jew nose with 1 nostril stapled to her crotch.

 

[SNEED.EXE]

if we were on a plane and the last parachute was stuffed in her vagina id just jump without it and hope for the best.

 

[UERISIMILITUDO]

Humans were a massive fucking mistake.

Okay this was fun I am just gonna report them now.

 

[like_shutup_&_drive_scoob]

In Minnesota sharing a nude pic is much worse than your child testing positive for cocaine.

What's with this nigger being scared of getting assaulted everywhere? No one is coming for that bussy, buddy.

She's eating poop and eggs for lunch.

And it looks like thousands died in the shower, but it is just rusty water.

Non-Christian countries like Japan still celebrate Christmas, even if it is with fried chicken and fucking.

More like Osama bin Alive this whole time

I wouldn't want to be stuck in prison with furries. That much is for sure.

SHES BROKE

SHES FAT

SHE WORSHIPS A PEDOPHILE

My Jeffrey Epstein fashion video keeps getting dumb comments about some stupid island! Listen, the guy knew how to dress. I don't see a reason to talk about anything else!

 

[Oliver Onions]

"YOUTUBE SHOULD NOT BE ALLOWED TO TELL FAT PEOPLE THAT THEY CAN'T HAVE PIZZA!!!"

 

[Stabby_Pencil]

Jews are quantum crackers

 

[Sneedenhagen Chew]

Why are so many nerds evil? Why is "I love video games, cartoons, and the immutable right of white men to dominate human civilization" such a common Type of Guy

 

[CallmeCicada]

web forums are like glue traps for autistic people.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Robots are watching for "cinnamon challenge."

It takes a human to notice him pan-frying his hand.

>Not die

That's the most bare minimum goal I've seen someone put out there unless his shit eating finally is catching up to him

He's the only guy I've ever looked at and just knew he could spontaneously combust and instinctively react to his own immolation by trying to eat his own burnt, raw-below-the-surface flesh before he perishes

10/10 shitpost, not only is it the perfect length and composition, but that avatar & username "Pajeet S. Tomlimu" is the ideal chef's kiss on top of it all. The perfect butterfly wingflap to start a shitstorm half a world away.

Erotica was a means to an end for seeing normally attractive women in normally attractive scenarios doing normally attractive things. Now it has devolved into cuckold findom ahegao double dildo riding bullshit with mumble rap twerking blasting in the background.

i found out that french people being angry and yelling is the funniest thing I've ever seen. It's like watching germans getting angry hits the same spot.

He's the classic dying person who is so nasty and curdled that it soothes them to imagine the world going to shit, because it means they won't be missing much by dying.

Does he live under the illusion that he has friends/people who actually like him?

Dreamer and a Doer. A doer of what again exactly? Failure? Yep, failure.

 

[Sexy Senior Citizen]

Those niggas don't know shit bout minky momo.

Oh he's still whorin' around.

We keep the thread clear of such frivolities.

Didn't you see he put little shitpost plaques under their pictures in the White House.

Missouri sued China (because fuck it why not, China sucks)

Fucking rockets from gaza have a lower failure rate than US aviation these days

Growing up means coming to terms with the fact that Adolf Hitler wasn't perfect..

We can now finally determine which state is best.

"What's the point of food stamps if it's just for real food?"

Imagine having a multi-page schizophrenic spaghetti spillage because people like a videogame and trying to insult someone else.

 

[Myrtle the Turtle]

"Hitler was smol bean who never did anything wrong"

 

[Aunt Carol]

Against this sea of retardation, I still shitpost.

As a parent of a giant headed baby, sometimes that shit just happens.

I like Gordon, he's a genius physicist with a nicely trimmed beard and unlike IRL men, he can shut the fuck up once in a while.

And Hell isn't even that bad! Just manage your expectations about the ice-cream machine.

But then, Hitler would have never been born if it wasn't for a woman, so.....

 

[Laburnum]

"I'm not sure what to say on something like this except I'm sorry this happened to you."

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

"Darrious Amour Lee Houston." Holy shit. Why didn't his parents just name him Nignog Prisoner#314 McCoonface?