random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[National Defense Advocate]

it's literally just abstract violent thoughts and racial slurs devoid of any sense

 

[Cemetery Support]

View attachment 6526056

God gave you free will and you will reap just what you sow.

Trump calling Shinzo handsome awoke my fujoshi heart.

 

[SSj_Ness (Yiffed)]

I didn't know he was fat, I remember him admitting he sucked dick in chat though.

 

[Cnidarian]

I didn't know Owl House was about the Bidens

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

Is the woman in the room with us?

Narrator: “it was a gay thing.”

"Aw fuck bro, I forgot to say 'no homo', now it's gay"

"It isn't gay to dress up as a cow and get railed in the ass," said no one ever.

I'm not gay but $20 is $20.

So I feel the need to state the obvious because clearly nobody's ever said it to him.

No, straight men cannot have sex with other men and still be straight. A man having sex with a man is a homosexual act, also known colloquially as "gay." That is what "gay" means. If you are male and have sex with a male, you have engaged in homosexuality and are not straight.

Why the fuck has no one (apparently) ever said this to him? Why the fuck did this idiot interviewer not do so?

Imagine failing a welfare check

Just when I thought the final boss of DEI couldn't get any more powerful, she becomes a frog.

It's not gay to suck a homie's dick if you're wearing socks.

He died like he lived. Having a man repeatedly blast loads into him.

 

[Miss Violet Beauregarde]

I’m still sure they wouldn’t know an actual Nazi if Heinrich Himmler shoved them into a train car.

 

[like_shutup_&_drive_scoob]

This is what happens when you say rain rain go away come back another day.

I'm still convinced Groypers are just 15 gay dudes circle jerking in a closet while posting on Twitter.

I know for a fact every male poster who has been talking about women fucking niggers and how they deserve no respect have been pussy free their entire life.

It's like one degree away from becoming "My uncle works at the Nintendo Kremlin".

Why the fuck me peepee hard

Shit man, that sounds like stalker ex tier text when read aloud. What retard have they got running this shit? Because it sounds like they are ready to leave a dead horse in your bed here.

It's pretty bad when you get burnt this bad by the guy who wrote a dissertation on why male horses can consent.

Zoomers don't smoke weed. They huff skittles flavored nitrous oxide.

 

[Pedophobe]

The internet is for bitch made niggers now I guess.

The seemingly multigenerational blood feud between users is a feature

What IS this??? What are you people doing with your time??

These people. My god, these people.

 

[S.C.U.D.]

your ego keeps forcing you to double down instead of doing the ethical thing and apologize for falsely calling me a, what was it, "misogynistic cockwomble," and deleting your post.

 

[Quartermaster]

I negrate you because you talk like a fag and your shit's all retarded.

 

[Meat Target]

"Holy fuck this bitch is ugly I wouldn't fuck her with a stolen dick!"

"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE HELP HELP RAPE!"

Sorry, as soon as you hit on kiwifarms, you grow a Y chromosome and a Hitler mustache.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Important public service announcement:
If you, or someone you know, fear that you may in fact finally hate journalists enough...please remain calm, and rest assured that no, you do not.

It just goes to show that spite and rage are more nutritious than all the organic produce and other health food in the world.

I'm the most vanilla person in the world, if I've heard of lesbians using strap-ons why haven't they?

Is breakfast-kin a thing yet?

nigga you got drunk and fucked a tranny? and then told us about it on the kiwi farms?

The crisp audio of the sheboon repeatedly yelling she's going to go home while she does nothing of the sort complements the video nicely.

He's right. He doesn't have any pedo friends, because he has no friends.

I hate these moments where two different historical subjects overlap in very dark ways.

 

[Tablet County]

Toriyama literally made the Buu Saga cause he was annoyed by power level faggotry and wanted to have Gohan call Buu a retard.

the jews made me a retard

Who the fuck listens to this goblin when he literally just abandoned a room in his house because a rat died in it and he didn't want to clean it up?

What does it matter that you've gone to seven countries? People in each one find that you're a piece of shit.

I sometimes forget this place is a shithole

If the cane industry starts making canes that are for everyone except those who use canes, they will also be in trouble.

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Nigger, do you have the bussy or do you fuck the bussy, answer the question, god damn.

 

[MS Paint Gigachad]

It'll kill everyone who goes to eat dog and Jack Scalfatty will get the death penalty for the mass casualty event.
Win-win-win if you ask me.

 

[Tablet County]

Anything looks decent if you look at the SRS thread too long.

Me fucking your mom isn't incest, kill yourself

Sorry no hay tortillas my lil mojaditos.

Don't goon with GBA supremacists.

i eat phosphorous powders. sometimes season my steak with them

That's some entry-grade /k/ tier shit. I want to know if you're aroused by the phosphorous powders undergoing a combustive chemical reaction kind of like the guys who lubed up with Cosmoline and got their junk stuck in the bolt-action receivers of their old slavshit rifles.

Most of the episode was unedited audio of each republican candidate giving their response to the issue of school shootings. But there was a spooky demon behind them the entire time.

 

[Gravemind]

Jesus Christ, get your head out of your ass. I'll never understand this idea that one needs to have an interesting or worthwhile opinion to be worthy of posting ON A WEBSITE PRIMARILY DESIGNED FOR LAUGHING AT RETARDS.

 

[Asian tech support]

I was surprised when I learned Hitler's first name was Adolf, I thought it was Heil for quite a long time.

 

[often puzzled]

"I don't believe that I am on anyone's dick. The last time that happened, it was a rather large horse."

"And I am the ORIGINAL faggot."

"You would think that after 15 years of mediumship via the computer, I wouldn't be making dumb mistakes. But since it's now on a phone, apparently I am."

Railed by what exactly? Jesus fucking Christ lol. Double dose of T, is that what is making her insane?

"It has occurred to me that I could try having a person watch me getting railed by something. But I don't think I could find someone who would do that AND be gender affirming, at least around here."

"Who needs AI porn when you have the astral plane?"

"Njordr called and said that you, too, have been drinking piss."

 

[Random Internet Person]

"normal people" don't compulsively share their every thought online