random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[CallmeCicada]

may not be the most original bad take, but it did result in a phonebooking, a thread, and the discovery of a mountain of Donkey Kong porn.

 

[Shiki Ouji]

Thanks ass doctors.

 

[Sensitive Young Man]

having pissed off every ISP in the world i now desire to find new frontiers of pissing people off

 

[Meat Target]

Not gooning is hyperborean. I hold in my pee and then scream when I have to pee so I can finish a youtube video.

 

[Laburnum]

"The mission briefing room was hot, again. Like, swamp ass hot."

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

I swear to God I am going to find you. I am going to find you and I am going to beat your ass before I fuck your mom so that every time you're at a family reunion you have to deal with the fact your brother looks like the guy who beat your ass over cereal.

 

[Black Man Underwear]

i have a gf. i'm pretty sure most of the sex we have is consensual

 

[Edward "Caesar" Sallow]

Well yeah, picking on the redditors is not allowed

If anything giving Josh money just gets you this big "I'm a retard and gave null money" badge under your avatar.

Who makes these rules on what you can say? Some randos that Null picks? It's not a good system now.

 

[Pube Dandruff]

There is truly no beginning to this man's talents.

 

[demicolon]

The only game that made it work is Punch-Out, which if I'm honest is heavily carried by racism.

 

[Pedophobe]

Sit and spin, haters.

There's no shortage of white niggers out there and this forum is fucking filled with stupid niggers.

Accept that you don't understand women. Move on.

 

[Gentlebastard]

The richness of the tapestry of his life is to die for. But the width of his waistline leaves much to be desired.

Wrong again, stalker. Enjoy the void beyond Eru's creation, child.

I am working on the most retarded idea I've ever had right now.

having pissed off every ISP in the world i now desire to find new frontiers of pissing people off

All my niggas Nazguls, Nazguls Heil Sauron.

There’s pretty good evidence that one suit going bad causes him to file another one elsewhere

The Third Law of Greer-Dynamics

You cannot apply rational actor theory to a political landscape where the most rational act is to send rape threats and invoke a cosmic war.

Please don't ask me how I fell into this rabbit hole

That's not how the law works. Pornstars sucking air through their teeth should also be punished by summary execution, but that's not how it works.

I feel the same about cyclists, send them to the glue factory.

 

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

Let me be autistic and retarded in peace please for the love of God.

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

These words mean absolutely nothing.

You are being domesticated by a screen and losing the ability to communicate. Once you are unable to say what you mean, you lose the ability to speak at all.

This is a form of censorship that is never talked about.

We need asylums dedicated to just Smash players at this point.

KARL! I know you see this. YOU ARE FAT!!! YOU ARE FUCKING FAT, KARL! FAAAAAAT!!!!

Imagine Skynet but instead of killing us all it just whines impotently about how we don't respect its pronouns.

The self-hating Euromutt can't handle the Los Alamos-branded Trvth Nukes that are bombarding the thread and has regressed to 7th-grade tier historical posturing in a disgruntled effort to cope with the overpowering realities of the world.

Treehouse employees deserve worse than the holocaust

That sounds fucking awesome. What is the issue exactly?

Easily avoidable wars defy easy explanations.

Rust builds character, but sinking just makes a reef.

If he wants to do so something decent on history he should kill himself, and then donate his body to Tasting History or Townsends so we can get a grisly episode on the Donner party or something.

Battleships are cool, retard.

Unlike our PhDs, which stand for pretty huge dicks.

Great, now I have the mental image of the Cat in the Hat launching pressurized cannisters at the Grinch as he Terminators his way across the set.

Maybe his wife should feed him a proper meal so he can look like a chud and not a twink.

charge your phone

There. The finest of AI slop. Fuck you all.

That's the gayest thing I've ever heard in my life. And that's saying something.

That's not how the law works. Pornstars sucking air through their teeth should also be punished by summary execution, but that's not how it works.

what is there exactly to be proud of sucking your own feces off a penis that was recently inside your rectum, on record for all the Internet to see, I have no idea but as they say "if you didn't try it, you can't judge it".

I just want to hear about Russel's last few days in the Karlbunker and what happened

Troon gets denied SNAP benefits.
The letter informing him of this has a smiley face on it, and the envelope has the number to the suicide hotline

 

[Sensitive Young Man]

I want to date either a Mexican or French woman who can actually cook because all I do is make dinner, use my Cowgirl Sex OnaHole 5000 with boiling soup on the table to kill some time to let it cool down, and it constantly spills all over me, burning my scrotum and ruining all my IKEA furniture. And it tastes bad and smells bad

 

[Gregis]

literally make your own sandwiches

you cannot make your own financial systems, you cannot make your own educational systems, you cannot make your own armed selfdefense systems

you can absolutely make your own fucking sandwiches

 

[Jonah Hill poster]

They reduce! They reuse! They recycle! They shit out slop and act like arbiters of culture!

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

We should all have gay sex. @God of Nothing, @Computer God Autism, @LORD IMPERATOR, @LovisXVI, @draggs, etc.

luke skywalker being into bdsm really doesnt feel like it fits star wars

Cologne with no deodorant is a wild choice, you'll be out here smelling like Versace Eros and pit sweat.

These people make me bitter and jaded, I love art, I love creating art, but I can't ever imagine having art friends because they're all like this. They're all entitled attention whores. These people love to say how much they are "anti AI" yet they are as soulless as AI. Complaining that you don't get enough likes on your mid Pokemon fan art? 248 likes is a lot for such low quality, mind you. Do those people not mean anything to you?
Don't give me that "oh but income, they need engagement for commissions" they should be grateful they get ANY engagement. Most of these people's artwork look mid. There's a lot of artists out there who create amazing art and notice how they don't bitch and moan nearly as much as these fags do. Go get a real job. They'll say that art is a real job yet these people act unprofessional and rarely create anything original.

I feel bad about jumping on the pile but it's the hot topic.

Chuck an Airfix kit of a Spitfire in there as well, or even better a Mamod steam engine. Autistic young men need diversion programs and even the spinniest of skirts can't compete with a working scale model of a traction engine.

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

Oh right, he's a canadian. He literally has no clue what he's talking about.

used the phrase 'macaronni in a pot pussy,' which should get him the death penalty imo, but hasn't because we've abandoned God

it is an extreme, moral, imperative, that we A-log this leafnigger's asshole

 

[Vampirella]

]

"I got punched in the nose and the teeth today I'm going to die I know I'm about to die. "