Job Hunting Tips and Tricks. - Or how to not get stuck as a retail wagie

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Audit said:
Nepotism and a resume that wasn't written by chatGPT. I autosend chatGPT resumes to the bin because it's a flag for retards unable to write a 1 page document without help. Also make sure you're not trying to go after the exact same highest profile job that literally everyone else applies for. I don't know your field, but if you're software try basic bitch shit like banking and insurance jobs. Google will make you dance like a monkey for 6 months before making a decision.
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Well, I'm on the East Coast and I refuse to live in the West Coast or New England because of how much their gun laws suck (as well as the fact they're full of commie faggots), so that leaves me with only jobs on the South and Midwest. I'm sending some apps to those areas (because at this point I may as well) but they're low priority.

Unfortunately, I'm in software and I've been applying to various software jobs requiring a bachelor's like insurance, defense, banking, the like, and it's been nothing but ghosting or passing me over for brown retards from India. So, in the meantime, I've been doing landscaping work and going for my master's just to get leg up on other applicants.

As for using ChatGPT, I have been using it, and it's only to get suggestions and tweaks to make it better fit the job posting and to possibly bypass any ATS filters. I usually rewrite the suggestions in my own words.
 
Not even being stupid or funny. This works 100% of the time for companies that are understaffed and sprint through critical things only once the deadline has almost arrived. And that's most companies in America right now, btw.

After your interview(s), regardless of how any of it goes, keep touching base with the hiring/HR point of contact. Just like a short email note weekly confirming you're still interested in the role (or even a similar role) and hope they're doing well with their search.

I've been on both sides of this: the HR and the job seeker. In all scenarios, having even a basic ongoing rapport with the hiring/HR/point of contact person means that your name is at the top of the list after 1-3 months when the people at the top are finally prioritizing "just picking someone decent to fill this fucking role" and they demand an instant name and an ass in a seat by the end of the week from HR.

Works every time. Have genuinely earned 3 jobs this way and hired people this way too because some executive straight up told me "who's still a warm candidate, now that we've dragged this out so long?"
 
lIllllIiiiiLLLLiiiiIIIIll said:
Not even being stupid or funny. This works 100% of the time for companies that are understaffed and sprint through critical things only once the deadline has almost arrived. And that's most companies in America right now, btw.

After your interview(s), regardless of how any of it goes, keep touching base with the hiring/HR point of contact. Just like a short email note weekly confirming you're still interested in the role (or even a similar role) and hope they're doing well with their search.

I've been on both sides of this: the HR and the job seeker. In all scenarios, having even a basic ongoing rapport with the hiring/HR/point of contact person means that your name is at the top of the list after 1-3 months when the people at the top are finally prioritizing "just picking someone decent to fill this fucking role" and they demand an instant name and an ass in a seat by the end of the week from HR.

Works every time. Have genuinely earned 3 jobs this way and hired people this way too because some executive straight up told me "who's still a warm candidate, now that we've dragged this out so long?"
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Do you think one should negotiate in this market? I just interviewed and i am pretty sure i got da job.
 
Audit said:
Nepotism and a resume that wasn't written by chatGPT. I autosend chatGPT resumes to the bin because it's a flag for retards unable to write a 1 page document without help. Also make sure you're not trying to go after the exact same highest profile job that literally everyone else applies for. I don't know your field, but if you're software try basic bitch shit like banking and insurance jobs. Google will make you dance like a monkey for 6 months before making a decision.
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How do you know if a resume was written by ChatGPT?
 
Audit said:
Nepotism and a resume that wasn't written by chatGPT. I autosend chatGPT resumes to the bin because it's a flag for retards unable to write a 1 page document without help. Also make sure you're not trying to go after the exact same highest profile job that literally everyone else applies for. I don't know your field, but if you're software try basic bitch shit like banking and insurance jobs. Google will make you dance like a monkey for 6 months before making a decision.
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There are two types of people. Those who need to apply to tons of jobs and those with the skills and connections to basically be able to get a job without applying. In either case its retarded for employers to expect applicants to rewrite whole resumes or even cover letters around each individual position they apply for unless maybe the job is something that centers around generating large amounts of handwritten unique text. Its especially true now when employers are using AI on the other end to randomly toss your carefully hand crafted resume/cover letter you agonized for days over into the garbage can for some inscrutable or no reason

. And LLMs are now good enough that if used properly it can sound more hand tailored than someone who does what sensible people did preGPT and tweak their resumes and cover letters for each position rather than writing it from scratch every time. And perhaps sometimes even more than a person who actually did write in from scratch.

So an HR drone who attempts to follow the no LLM rule unless they are some savant who's cracked the code will end up tossing a bunch of legitimate resumes that were hand tweaked or maybe written in some way that felt off while keeping LLM generated ones by applicants skilled enough at using them or fail in even more spectacular ways.
 
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grump said:
There are two types of people. Those who need to apply to tons of jobs and those with the skills and connections to basically be able to get a job without applying. In either case its retarded for employers to expect applicants to rewrite whole resumes or even cover letters around each individual position they apply for unless maybe the job is something that centers around generating large amounts of handwritten unique text. Its especially true now when employers are using AI on the other end to randomly toss your carefully hand crafted resume/cover letter you agonized for days over into the garbage can for some inscrutable or no reason

. And LLMs are now good enough that if used properly it can sound more hand tailored than someone who does what sensible people did preGPT and tweak their resumes and cover letters for each position rather than writing it from scratch every time. And perhaps sometimes even more than a person who actually did write in from scratch.

So an HR drone who attempts to follow the no LLM rule unless they are some savant who's cracked the code will end up tossing a bunch of legitimate resumes that were hand tweaked or maybe written in some way that felt off while keeping LLM generated ones by applicants skilled enough at using them or fail in even more spectacular ways.
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Been on the job search myself, and I find it crazy how positions which I'm like perfectly qualified for and fit right in my career interest & both MSc & BSc quals will pass over cover letter's I've taken take to write out each individual line and make them as impactful as I can - yet the shit I care less about and have iffy qualifications for that have gotten me interviews off fucking CoPilot "please edit this cover letter to fit this job, please"
 
If you have a diploma or a GED and aren't a complete fucking autistic, customer service agent is actually a pretty good job. I mean I make $25 an hour and all I have to do is fix people's problems over the phone and get my retarded accent goofed on by niggers who call up.
It's not glamorous or anything, but $25 an hour is really fucking nice money.
 
Lip Glossary said:
If you have a diploma or a GED and aren't a complete fucking autistic, customer service agent is actually a pretty good job. I mean I make $25 an hour and all I have to do is fix people's problems over the phone and get my retarded accent goofed on by niggers who call up.
It's not glamorous or anything, but $25 an hour is really fucking nice money.
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I fucking despise customer service with an anger of a thousand suns.
I'm just tired of job hunting. The constant ghosting, the insane nepotism of Indians and my distaste for their accent (if I answer the phone and I hear one, I will immediately hang up), and it doesn't help that trying to get experience is like pulling toenails. Sure, there's volunteering, but that's just employment with zero pay and benefits.
 
REGENDarySumanai said:
I fucking despise customer service with an anger of a thousand suns.
I'm just tired of job hunting. The constant ghosting, the insane nepotism of Indians and my distaste for their accent (if I answer the phone and I hear one, I will immediately hang up), and it doesn't help that trying to get experience is like pulling toenails. Sure, there's volunteering, but that's just employment with zero pay and benefits.
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There was a meme going around the other day that a CS Major decided to start arranging the interviews himself. He'd submit the resume, wait a couple days for it to get into the system, then call the company 'in response to setting up a time for the interview' as if HR had moved him forward. So long as the company is large enough, he claims it worked, over and over.

Having just finished a corpo job with a dementia-ridden HR lady, I believe him 100%. Give it a shot.
 
Lip Glossary said:
If you have a diploma or a GED and aren't a complete fucking autistic, customer service agent is actually a pretty good job. I mean I make $25 an hour and all I have to do is fix people's problems over the phone and get my retarded accent goofed on by niggers who call up.
It's not glamorous or anything, but $25 an hour is really fucking nice money.
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This is an okay stopgap job while you're looking for something better but if you drop anchor and consider it good enough to stay in long term it's soul crushing.
You just get paid to be yelled at by people with barely the brain power to wipe properly, micromanaged by people who are barely any better, and the rules on what constitutes "doing a good job" constantly changes so you're never hitting your goals.
I did it for years and the day I changed careers and left was the most liberating day of my life. I felt like one of the prisoners released from Bergen Belsen but with the added benefit of knowing that I am not a jew.
 
REGENDarySumanai said:
I fucking despise customer service with an anger of a thousand suns.
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Well there are two kinds of customer service. There is the front line of retards that you initially get, and then there is the actual customer service that when the retards can't help you they send you to. I'm the second one.
When you call customer service, those first people literally just go off a checklist of things and if you need more help past the checklist, that's when your call gets kicked over to me.
Fun fact also that not a lot of people know: when you are on hold for a different customer service agent, normally it's not because I'm on another call. It's because the programs they use are so fucking old and unreliable that I'm still waiting for your account to pop up on my computer so I can do something. So anytime you hear that "customer service is down" it means that the fucking shitty program that hasn't changed in 20 years went down and we have to go put duct tape on it, because they don't want to train old employees on new shit.
REGENDarySumanai said:
Indians and my distaste for their accent (if I answer the phone and I hear one, I will immediately hang up)
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Another fun fact: the company I worked for used to outsource completely to India. This is why they had to bring customer service jobs back to America, because people would hang up as soon as they heard an Indian accent :story:
 
I got the job with the post office. I've learned a christmas season is best for applying since they're understaffed for the amount consumer crap and gift cards shipped. So there's still time to apply right now. I had to go to one of the major mail hubs to get fingerprinted and had to use the Selective Service website to dig up my draft number, at my old work most of the women and some of the men were unaware there even was still a draft system.
 
Fanatical Pragmatist said:
Been on the job search myself, and I find it crazy how positions which I'm like perfectly qualified for and fit right in my career interest & both MSc & BSc quals will pass over cover letter's I've taken take to write out each individual line and make them as impactful as I can - yet the shit I care less about and have iffy qualifications for that have gotten me interviews off fucking CoPilot "please edit this cover letter to fit this job, please"
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Yea I just Ai cover letters now; fuck it, nobody's gonna read it anyway.

Is there a chance to get a job in tech without a LinkedIn profile? Like, everyone seems to DEMAND a profile, to the point where applications have a "required" tab for Linkedin.
 
I have been having the damnedest time getting a job. I can send in applications online and never get a call back. I go in and the hiring manager keeps informing that she wants me, but after two months of going back every week checking in i have yet to get the okay, and i am apparently still waiting as they never turned me down.

Im at my wits end.
 
Rules of getting a job.
1. Have enough bullshit achievements to look impressive, but not too many that it looks like you just put anything on there
2. Don't be a broke nigga, NEVER be a broke nigga. At rich nigga enterprises we try not to hire bitchless brokies
3. Be clean, don't be some greasy ass unshaven fag who looks like he's about tell his friend's not to come to uni tommorrow or some shi
4. Have that drippy fashion, nothing to crazy, but keep it fresh and unique. Maybe don't wear skinny jeans, but dont wear a dress
(Optional)
5. Be Transgender, or a cuck. Big companies love hiring people that are hated by their family and have no loved ones because it means they will not have any excuses to go off work, and can therefore spend more time making the company money.
 
Fanatical Pragmatist said:
Been on the job search myself, and I find it crazy how positions which I'm like perfectly qualified for and fit right in my career interest & both MSc & BSc quals will pass over cover letter's I've taken take to write out each individual line and make them as impactful as I can - yet the shit I care less about and have iffy qualifications for that have gotten me interviews off fucking CoPilot "please edit this cover letter to fit this job, please"
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Faestus said:
Yea I just Ai cover letters now; fuck it, nobody's gonna read it anyway.

Is there a chance to get a job in tech without a LinkedIn profile? Like, everyone seems to DEMAND a profile, to the point where applications have a "required" tab for Linkedin.
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I will caveat this with updating that I've accepted a job with an org which I sent in a hand-typed cover letter for.
 
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