🐮 Lolcow Jeffrey Leibowitz / Not Dead Yet

[Robert w'E'd Leef]

Horrible way to go out

 

[Hitchhiker]

The problem generally with snakes as pets is how fast they are able to bite. I've watched people handle snakes, and one time a guy got bit. It was so fast that no one watching actually realized it happened until he showed us the bite mark afterwards. They also sometimes will just refuse food for no reason, so you can't tell if they are terminally sick, or just being assholes.

Snakes are literally inherently designed to be dangerous to things that fuck with them. If you don't bother them they are perfectly chill, I've had a couple close encounters with wild Rattlesnakes, and they just mosey on out of the way when they see me coming.

If you want a snake-like pet get a skink. They are very silly creatures with funny little legs.

 

[Big moth tiddies]

Idk what it is with reptiles, but this hobby attracts just so many weirdos and "Hey, look at meee" types, it's kind of insane.

That's because choosing a reptile as a pet to begin with oftentimes starts as seeking attention. Otherwise there's no reason to choose an animal that requires much more attention, care, and maintenance as reptiles when you can just get a dog, cat, bird, or fish.

"Dur hurr, look at me, I have a gecko that requires me to keep this specific area of my house this temperature, and if I make one mistake it gets an infection or if I fuck up in one small way, it's dead and gone forever!"

That's not to say they all are attention seeking whores, but that's often why do it in the first place. KingCobra JFS is a perfect example, even though bearded dragons are relatively easy to take care of when it comes to reptiles.

RIP to my nigga, Puff.

 

[cuddle striker]

That's because choosing a reptile as a pet to begin with oftentimes starts as seeking attention. Otherwise there's no reason to choose an animal that requires much more attention, care, and maintenance as reptiles when you can just get a dog, cat, bird, or fish.

"Dur hurr, look at me, I have a gecko that requires me to keep this specific area of my house this temperature, and if I make one mistake it gets an infection or if I fuck up in one small way, it's dead and gone forever!"

That's not to say they all are attention seeking whores, but that's often why do it in the first place. KingCobra JFS is a perfect example, even though bearded dragons are relatively easy to take care of when it comes to reptiles.

RIP to my nigga, Puff.

I had a friend/coworker who had geckos in this beautiful entire wall aquarium, or terrarium, not sure what it's called. full of plants and such. they had a dinner party for a few of us from work and I'd never seen anything like it and had no idea they had any pets until then.

the lizards were fairly cute but aggressive, they said they didn't handle them, just built the enclosure for them to keep them.

something like those complicated salt water fish, I think. they had no snakes though.

from reading more about this today, there's an entire community of what I can only call "Snake Freaks", they're keeping venomous snakes and molesting them in various ways. There is some overlap with the whole exotic pet trade people but I can't tell how much.

A community watch on these people might be pretty funny. They get attacked a lot, on camera.

 

[Manimal House]

Sounds like you're a rat.

Now you got me thinking that snake people are Bossmanjack.





I mean, if you like snakes then cool, but some people who really like them sound exactly like pitbull owners who can't comprehend why most people tend to avoid that breed. It's the same shit, either you like them or you don't:

 

[Endangered Species List]

This guy is just one of many in this community from the impression that I've gotten.

It’s insane how even the big people in the community are highly controversial.
Brian Barczyk (5.62M subscribers)(dead)
JayPrehistoricPets (6.06M subscribers)
Chandler’s Wild Life (2.77M subscribers)
Snake Discovery (3.18M subscribers)
GoHerping (612K subscribers)
Taylor Nicole Dean (1.9M subscribers)

Also, on the topic of snake youth-in-asia, anyone else remember when this happened?

'Heinous' Killing of Snakes Puts Spotlight on Florida Wildlife Officers​

Spoiler: Excerpts

FWC officers are authorized to euthanize wild reticulated and Burmese pythons, a species that was prohibited in Florida in 2021 because of its invasive nature. But when they conducted an April 6 raid on a reptile facility in Sunrise, Florida, they mistakenly killed a pregnant boa constrictor that was worth $100,000, along with 34 captive pythons.

An FWC spokesperson told Newsweek that Bill McAdam, the Sunrise facility's owner, relinquished the snakes to that FWC and requested the FWC officers euthanize the pythons. But Parker said that can't be true because McAdam wasn't on the scene.

Officers euthanized the pythons at the facility in Sunrise after battling legally with snake breeder Chris Coffee, who legally owned more than 120 pythons before a 2021 Florida law made ownership illegal. Before the law's passage, Coffee had obtained a special permit to keep and sell the snakes.

After the law passed, the FWC gave Coffee five months to find a new home for the pythons. At the end of that time, Coffee still possessed more than 30 of them, and officers gave Coffee an ultimatum: Either allow them to euthanize the snakes or he would go to jail. Coffee gave the officers permission to euthanize the pythons, but he warned them not to kill a pregnant boa constrictor kept in the same area, which is legal in Florida. The boa was owned by McAdam.

Officers then began euthanizing the pythons, which was filmed by Coffee on his phone after he left the room. Several minutes into the video, which was posted on YouTube by USARK Florida, officers pulled the pregnant boa out of her cage and killed her as well. The snake writhed in the background as the officers looked at one another, one with his hands on his head in apparent shock, when they realized they had killed the wrong snake.

Coffee is off-screen during the video, but he can be heard reacting to the devastating news when officers tell him they killed the boa constrictor, which McAdam had owned for 11 years and named Big Shirl.

The FWC's website says it uses a device that shoots a bolt into the snake's brain, thus "humanely" killing the reptile. The website instructs officers to follow a two-step process. The first step renders the reptile unconscious, while the second destroys its brain.

But according to Coffee, the entire process was inhumane. At the start of the video, the officer administering the bolt admits he's handled only one python in the past. Another officer asks if he needs to "practice" the fatal maneuver, to which a third officer said, "He doesn't need to practice."

Besides the boa, the video shows some of the other snakes writhing after they were shot. FWC officers held up one of the dead reptiles and posed for a photo before dumping the carcass in a large trash can.

 

[Culled]

anyone else remember

Yeah, I do.
I had heard about it from Clint's Reptiles ( He seems like one of the better/more responsible channels overall, even though he had that Chandler idiot on his Black Mamba episode and also got one of the wobble Pythons iirc).
Fucked situation all around and if I remember correctly that Coffee guy made a serious effort to rehome all the snakes he could but there were just too many of them for the time he had. I really hated the attitude these officers displayed and feel bad for the snakes.

GoHerping (612K subscribers)

I didn't watch all of his videos, not even close, but he always seemed very "animal well being first". He's considered controversial?
Probably doesn't matter much anymore since he stopped doing reptile content after his business went broke, but surprising to me regardless.

 

[Grundlejungle]

That's because choosing a reptile as a pet to begin with oftentimes starts as seeking attention. Otherwise there's no reason to choose an animal that requires much more attention, care, and maintenance as reptiles when you can just get a dog, cat, bird, or fish.

"Dur hurr, look at me, I have a gecko that requires me to keep this specific area of my house this temperature, and if I make one mistake it gets an infection or if I fuck up in one small way, it's dead and gone forever!"

That's not to say they all are attention seeking whores, but that's often why do it in the first place. KingCobra JFS is a perfect example, even though bearded dragons are relatively easy to take care of when it comes to reptiles.

RIP to my nigga, Puff.

>fish and birds
>easy
Oh shit nigger, are you retarded?

 

[Paper Machete]

Otherwise there's no reason to choose an animal that requires much more attention, care, and maintenance as reptiles when you can just get a dog, cat, bird, or fish.

A lot of reptiles are super easy to care for, especially snakes. Many of them only require regular cage cleaning and a mouse once a week during summer and less often during the winter months. Many exotic reptiles and amphibians are on par with fish. They're animals you have because you like looking at them and their enclosures are part of the appeal when decorating the house. I would say, if you can't have a kick ass enclosure for them then I don't really get it. Because they don't really enjoy interacting physically with people and they're not an animal you can have out of their enclosure without strict supervision. So it's a lot of effort for a conversation piece. You can find supplies for cats and dogs really cheap, even forego bedding if you're okay with them using your furniture. Exotic animals all require more expensive set ups and can't just let them loose in the house.

 

[RodgerDodger]

It wasn't always illegal to export Australian native snakes out of the country. I think the laws changed in the 1970s, but don't quote me on that. In theory, all Australian native animals overseas are descended from captive bred individuals that were exported before it became illegal; in practice that's far from the truth, however.

This wanker's snakes being euthanised doesn't make much sense. There are nutjobs in the US who collect taipans and other very deadly snakes, apparently they are extremely rare and expensive animals, it surely wouldn't take too long to find someone who would happily take on unwanted animals. Even if it took some weeks, many snakes can go that long without food or water without too much trouble. If it's true that they were all euthanised, I suspect that they were either in very bad condition, or he didn't have the necessary licenses and couldn't provide proof that they weren't smuggled into the country in someone's underwear.

They euthanize non native venomous animals in Florida for good reason. They have more than enough problems with the local shit and non venomous invasive shit. And Florida Man is a thing for a reason. If it is stupid Florida Man will do it, collect it or attempt to breed it.

Back in the day I was one of the first in on a house fire of one of these nuts. His whole house was filled with tanks of rattlesnakes, venomous spiders, scorpions, everything. A cop had pulled him out and even gone back in to get his Cat and Dog. When he started begging her to save his snakes and spiders she drew the line. We ran out in an emergency Evac when we found his collection of vintage hand grenades, mortar shells and artillery ammo. No the snakes were not rescued. And especially not the spiders. That one still creeps into my nightmares. Needless to say there was also a crap ton of drugs.

 

[Cave Fisher]

Three pages in and he's already in what might be his lolcow series finale.
Just another example of what happens when you keep an exotic animal that's designed to fuck people up because you think you can domesticate it like a cat or a dog.

 

[Bucephalus]

Back in the day I was one of the first in on a house fire of one of these nuts. His whole house was filled with tanks of rattlesnakes, venomous spiders, scorpions, everything. A cop had pulled him out and even gone back in to get his Cat and Dog. When he started begging her to save his snakes and spiders she drew the line. We ran out in an emergency Evac when we found his collection of vintage hand grenades, mortar shells and artillery ammo. No the snakes were not rescued. And especially not the spiders. That one still creeps into my nightmares. Needless to say there was also a crap ton of drugs.

It had to have been an electrical fire, right?

I'm assuming he had them all in one room, because these types usually have a "reptile room" where all the tanks are stacked on top of each other. Then each of the critters must have had a heat lamp, and then a normal lamp next to it. That's two wires, two outlets, per tank. If he has a bunch of them, the only way he's going to get that working is with a power strip or a multi-plug adapter. And if he keeps that running 12 hours a day, or God forbid 24/7... incredibly easy to overload the circuit and start a fire.

 

[Big moth tiddies]

>fish and birds
>easy
Oh shit nigger, are you retarded?

Many birds and fish are very easy to care for. In fact the problem with some birds is that the fuckers outlive their owners. I'm obviously not referring to some exotic birds and tropical fish that requires a ton of upkeep, but minnows, goldfish, and bettas are all easy to deal with.

Many exotic reptiles and amphibians are on par with fish. They're animals you have because you like looking at them and their enclosures are part of the appeal when decorating the house. I would say, if you can't have a kick ass enclosure for them then I don't really get it. Because they don't really enjoy interacting physically with people and they're not an animal you can have out of their enclosure without strict supervision.

See, that's the difference between a responsible owner and attention whores who want to pose with their snakes and take retarded pictures for reddit and shit. I have no problems those people. People like King Cobra who just want to walk around all day with a lizard on their shoulder or drape a python around them are the ones I have an issue with.

 

[Bucephalus]

This wanker's snakes being euthanised doesn't make much sense. There are nutjobs in the US who collect taipans and other very deadly snakes, apparently they are extremely rare and expensive animals, it surely wouldn't take too long to find someone who would happily take on unwanted animals.

Think like a cop from Hickville, South Carolina for a second.

You have been called to the scene of a home of a man who has recently been hospitalized due to a venomous snake bite. You don't know which one is the "in-land Thai-pan," but you know that one of these snakes poses an immediate threat to human life. And you're no ophiologist, but you think you can make out a couple of rattlesnakes and cobras in those tanks, and you've seen enough movies to know you definitely don't want to play snake charmer with them.

Based on the evidence in front of you, are you:

1. Going to start collecting the live snakes as evidence, possibly opening you or your fellow boys in blue up to the same fate as the poor bastard in the hospital?
2. Going to try and auction them off to another nutjob, potentially opening your department up to a wrongful death lawsuit?
3. Going to take a shovel from his garage and "clear the scene" first?

 

[Neetness]

Many birds and fish are very easy to care for. In fact the problem with some birds is that the fuckers outlive their owners. I'm obviously not referring to some exotic birds and tropical fish that requires a ton of upkeep, but minnows, goldfish, and bettas are all easy to deal with.

See, that's the difference between a responsible owner and attention whores who want to pose with their snakes and take retarded pictures for reddit and shit. I have no problems those people. People like King Cobra who just want to walk around all day with a lizard on their shoulder or drape a python around them are the ones I have an issue with.

Betta aren't that easy to care for, they're just hardy fish and difficult to kill. It's a bit of work to have them thriving.

 

[Shark Fin Flippers]

Betta aren't that easy to care for, they're just hardy fish and difficult to kill. It's a bit of work to have them thriving.

There is no such thing as an "easy to care for bird" either. Except maybe pigeons (which are domestic animals btw). Their social needs far outweigh what most people can give them. Just because they aren't actively dieing does not mean they are healthy nor thriving.

Same with bettas. People probably think Betta fish are easy to care for because they see them stuffed into tiny empty bowls all the time, which is pretty much torture for them.

As someone else said, reptiles and fish are more like hands on decor, or like any other hobby, more than they are pets.
Some animals can still form "bonds" with their owners, but they don't love you like a dog does.

Nooooo, I think I remember the Urban Rescue Ranch guy hanging out with him a few times. I didn't know anything about this guy and seeing him mess with animals for no reason is really infuriating.

Stupid nigger brought a fucking pitbull to his ranch recently, and watching the video flip from him snuggling all over a clearly uncomfortable pit over to a close up of little baby beevo actually made me shutter. I hope he doesn't try and keep it for a livestock guardian....
He also seems to be taking a page out of that reptile guys playbook, and fucked around and found out by getting bit by his mini caimen pretty badly by actively taunting it.
Not to mention he needs to get his fucking animals neutered.

That being said I do love the guy and think he is doing really well at what he does and is doing a good thing, but I hope he doesn't start getting as stupid as these other crazy animals tubers.
Rant over back to lurk mode

 

[Echo_Doge]

Snakes are like the most passive lazy ass animals around, I dunno why you would think of them as assholes. they are just chill bros who like to sleep under rocks and eat mice and rats.

Like most animals, this varies hugely depending on the breed.

I've personally found Copperheads and Water Moccasins to be aggressive assholes that will actively chase people and animals when they're hunting. Just because they can.


Back on-topic, any update on this moron?

 

[Marche]

That's because choosing a reptile as a pet to begin with oftentimes starts as seeking attention. Otherwise there's no reason to choose an animal that requires much more attention, care, and maintenance as reptiles when you can just get a dog, cat, bird, or fish.

"Dur hurr, look at me, I have a gecko that requires me to keep this specific area of my house this temperature, and if I make one mistake it gets an infection or if I fuck up in one small way, it's dead and gone forever!"

That's not to say they all are attention seeking whores, but that's often why do it in the first place. KingCobra JFS is a perfect example, even though bearded dragons are relatively easy to take care of when it comes to reptiles.

RIP to my nigga, Puff.

Honestly snakes are like one of the most easy ass pets to keep, even more so than a dog or cat.
You give them a heater and light on a timer, clean their shit which they only do like once a week and feed them a mouse or rat every week or so depending on the species and thats it.
Kinda like fish in a way that they are just there in the tank except you can actually touch them and get them out and let them wiggle around on your floor if you are into that.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

Of all the times for AR to not be around, had to be when some retard manhandled a taipan wrong. Would've liked to have gotten her take on this.

Also while Google Imaging taipans to look for some cute pics, happened upon this old story about some 19-year-old Aussie who got bit by his pet taipan.

 

[TractorGirl]

Shovel came in handy this morning, only good brown snake is a dead one.