What suicide methods are most likely to be lethal while avoiding major disfigurement?

[ididn’tchoosetobethisgay]

Open casket friendly. Suffering is not an important factor either way.

EDIT: I’m not dead and posting this was fucking retarded. I appreciate the comments of concern. It’s probably best I take some time away from here.

 

[ididn’tchoosetobethisgay]

Is there really going to be a big turnout to your funeral, though?

I doubt it. But I’m a first responder and I’d like to imagine my body remaining intact when I’m dead. I want to look like myself not some of the corpses I’ve been unfortunate enough to see. (Before you ask, no I am not in Law Enforcement)

 

[Mariposa2.0 LTE]

I doubt it. But I’m a first responder and I’d like to imagine my body remaining intact when I’m dead. I want to look like myself not some of the corpses I’ve been unfortunate enough to see.

Hooray for first responders. I'm a nurse, but I have a cousin who's a medic. The worst thing I've dealt with is Kennedy Butterfly Ulcers. Ya'll see some real shit.

 

[ididn’tchoosetobethisgay]

Are you okay?

No

 

[Unsane]

I highly recommend not going too soon in case you miss something.

 

[CowPox]

Come on now, that just sounds like an extra sexy Friday night. Not to mention the disfigurement that can be caused by hanging.

You don't hang, you just strangle, next to the pickles and French's mustard.

 

[The Tall Man]

That is one lizard like man, but I’m not sure that’s a practical option lol

Why is it not practical? Because his bodyguards might shoot and kill you?

 

[DankSmoker]

I doubt it. But I’m a first responder and I’d like to imagine my body remaining intact when I’m dead. I want to look like myself not some of the corpses I’ve been unfortunate enough to see. (Before you ask, no I am not in Law Enforcement)

Maybe you should take solace that you're not one of those clean-up guys, then.

 

[Blobby's Murder Knife]

No

Please don't do this.

 

[dick brain]

No

Wanna talk about it?

 

[ididn’tchoosetobethisgay]

You don't hang, you just strangle, next to the pickles and French's mustard.

In your vivid little fantasy about me, am I engaging in any sexual acts aside from autoerotic asphyxia?

 

[Xenomorph]

Spoiler: This

Living till 100 yrs old and dying peacefully in bed.

 

[Wine em Dine em 69 em]

Morticians can perform miracles with all sorts of fucked up corpses if that eases your mind.
Also don’t suicide bait here if that’s what you’re doing. Maybe you’d be more comfortable on Instagram or xitter if you want attention.

 

[Blobby's Murder Knife]

Morticians can perform miracles with all sorts of fucked up corpses if that eases your mind.
Also don’t suicide bait here if that’s what you’re doing. Maybe you’d be more comfortable on Instagram or xitter if you want attention.

And if he is serious, he can just DM me. I've never attempted suicide, but I sure as fuck have a lot of experience with people who have.

 

[ididn’tchoosetobethisgay]

Morticians can perform miracles with all sorts of fucked up corpses if that eases your mind.
Also don’t suicide bait here if that’s what you’re doing. Maybe you’d be more comfortable on Instagram or xitter if you want attention.

I wouldn’t ask about suicide anywhere associated with my real identity.

 

[The Internet Dick]

Anyone who's lived a life has gone through days almost too terrible to bear. The saving grace of such terrible days is they pass, and life gets better.

Life is worth living. Reach out to someone IRL.

 

[Xenomorph]

I wouldn’t ask about suicide anywhere associated with my real identity.

Ive been there, and when I tell you the moment the life started pouring out of me in the bathtub I was terrified and wanted someone to come save me and guess what someone did and a person like you saved my life.

 

[Fascist Frederick]

It doesn't matter, just pick a method and do it. A wise man once said: "A good plan executed now is better than a perfect plan next week". If you wait too long your self loathing might subside, strike while the iron is hot.

 

[Osama Bin Laden]

 

[Twinkie]

Why do you care how it looks, you'll be dead. Seeing you in the casket won't make your loved ones less upset.

 

[vomitusdeux]

anyone saying carbon monoxide is wrong. Have you ever seen the face contortion on those corpses? They do not have a low disfigurement rate, you will not look good in that casket.