The Official Tomb Raider Grieving Thread - Including the sad, pathetic 2010s trilogy.

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Do we really need a new reboot?

  • Yeah, I think it's about that time

  • No, the franchise is dead.

  • NO, A FOLLOWUP WHERE LARA PREACHES BOUT SLAY QUEEN DEFEATING EVIL ORANGE MAN

  • who cares, square enix killed another franchise

Results are only viewable after voting.
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Hooligan Handgun said:
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A TL;DR for those who don't want to read through this:

Crystal Dynamics are trying to add the reboot lore to the originals, which actively contradicts the everlasting fuck out of it due to the reboot lore being written by a Tumblrina. Of course, the reboot niggerfaggots are shilling & starting up gaslight squads & being eager to appeal to triviality with anyone taking issue with Crystal Dynamics trying to fix what wasn't broken to begin with.
 
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I quite like the remastered trilogy. Aspyr did a great job. The controls aren't that bad.

I can imagine the concept being so utterly foreign upon release, control scheme wise. Not having joysticks and having to rely on the d pad button things would do a number on your fingers.
 
Scarlett Johansson said:
I quite like the remastered trilogy. Aspyr did a great job. The controls aren't that bad.

I can imagine the concept being so utterly foreign upon release, control scheme wise. Not having joysticks and having to rely on the d pad button things would do a number on your fingers.
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Now you just need the perfect controller to go with it...
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Quarterback Rex Grossman said:
Apparently Lara is gay (or bi, same thing) in the new Netflix series that supposedly bridges the gap between the shitty reboot games and the original Core games. Just a reminder it's been 21 years now since we had a game featuring Classic Lara, and we'll likely never see her again.
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i think they said they were interested in doing a new game but it got screwed over after embracer group failed to get that sweet saudi money

edit: i was talking about the wrong game. that was deus ex. i mean, they may have said the same thing for tomb raider as well, but idk
 
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Quarterback Rex Grossman said:
Apparently Lara is gay (or bi, same thing) in the new Netflix series that supposedly bridges the gap between the shitty reboot games and the original Core games. Just a reminder it's been 21 years now since we had a game featuring Classic Lara, and we'll likely never see her again.
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It gets worse. And you can thank the writer for making it woke.
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But someone on /v/ had to turn it into a meme template.
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Quarterback Rex Grossman said:
Apparently Lara is gay (or bi, same thing) in the new Netflix series that supposedly bridges the gap between the shitty reboot games and the original Core games. Just a reminder it's been 21 years now since we had a game featuring Classic Lara, and we'll likely never see her again.
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i literally dont understand these people. the entire concept of bisexuality literally is just there for sex appeal, because guess what it's inherently unthreatening to dudes who already jack it to the idea of lara scissoring samus. these people are just horny retards who think it's some epic own that a character created for cooming is now being coomed to by them too. it's bizarre, at the end of the day youre not talented and youre bitchless
 
Scarlett Johansson said:
I quite like the remastered trilogy. Aspyr did a great job. The controls aren't that bad.

I can imagine the concept being so utterly foreign upon release, control scheme wise. Not having joysticks and having to rely on the d pad button things would do a number on your fingers.
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It's great and completely binary in nature. Run to a ledge, stop, jump back once, run and jump. Perfect execution every single time. The only way you can fuck it up is if you're hasty or have to "manually" gauge the distance, which is the intent later on. Only times I actually died. Only used modern controls on the big skelly boy cause I was going for pistols only and limited saves. Ironically, the second game having no limited save achievement, I lost interest.. now that I should just save every 5 mins and play without stress and regret.

Fuck. Ive been looking for a "my" franchise for ages and TR was close with the remaster. I don't mind generic ubisoft slop unlockathons so the survivor trilogy was alright by me. Now, giving her borderline flat tits, a constant urge to be bisexual, and trying to force modern shit into the old games? Nah. Ill stick with my remaster and leave it at that.
 
BetterFuckChuck said:
i literally dont understand these people. the entire concept of bisexuality literally is just there for sex appeal, because guess what it's inherently unthreatening to dudes who already jack it to the idea of lara scissoring samus. these people are just horny retards who think it's some epic own that a character created for cooming is now being coomed to by them too. it's bizarre, at the end of the day youre not talented and youre bitchless
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I disagree on one point. Lara Croft was not created for cooming.
In the original games, she is portrayed as cold as ice, with no mention of her sex life whatsoever. She isn't designed as some bimbo in a skimpy outfit but rather as a sexy female hero.

While some of the buzz around Lara at the time certainly emphasized her sexy design, it's different from characters like Eve from Stellar Blade, whose alternative costumes clearly mark her as masturbation material. Lara's outfits never made her look like a bimbofied whore.

With AAAA gaming pushing ugly characters and slant eyes making "fuck dolls," the art of creating an attractive character who doesn't look like a whore has nearly vanished in gaming.

In a sense these pinko weirdos have sexualized Lara and turned her into the Tumblr version of a Bimbo.
 
BetterFuckChuck said:
i literally dont understand these people. the entire concept of bisexuality literally is just there for sex appeal, because guess what it's inherently unthreatening to dudes who already jack it to the idea of lara scissoring samus.
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Not me. I always ship her with the only man worthy of her.
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Or her canonical girlfriend, Witchblade.
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The funny thing is Lara has always been in control of her sexuality. She isn't exploited. She fucking shoots the player for perving in the shower lol.
 
"Unified" Lara is such a stupid term. They aren't unifying anything. They are just making a new reddit-approved version of the old '90s character, complete with gayness, smaller boobs, and super dark skin. When was Lara ever considered Latina until recently? We all knew about the Laura Cruz thing way back when, but she was supposed to be based on the designer's (stacked?) white British sister. At most she had a tan from adventuring or whatnot, but in the last game they gave her a dark brown pigmy mom with no tits who looks Guatemalan. Wouldn't it make more sense for Lara to be part Spaniard or something, and thus still white?
 
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