🗑️ Trashfire StyxHexenhammer666 / Tarl Warwick - Oddball Occultist Neckbeard (who can make some interesting content) + his many scorned exes

[Leylon Sneed]

This is one instance where if he had just no showed, it might have worked out better for him than showing up drunk. It doesn't sound like he got those tests, it doesn't sound like his probation officer is being kept aware of his whereabouts, it doesn't sound like he's retained counsel. To top it all off he showed up wearing that fucking stupid hat.

 

[Stunner900]

This just proves what a narcissistic cunt she is,

Thank God her ex-husband has main custody of the kids.

 

[TheTurdReich]

This is one instance where if he had just no showed, it might have worked out better for him than showing up drunk. It doesn't sound like he got those tests, it doesn't sound like his probation officer is being kept aware of his whereabouts, it doesn't sound like he's retained counsel. To top it all off he showed up wearing that fucking stupid hat.

They would have still issued the warrant, he was meant to show up in person and the Judge has clearly been briefed on the Vermont situation as well. He was fucked no matter what.

 

[Dumbledore's Onlyfans]

Tarl now has 5 options:

1. Stay put at Mel's, get tased in the street outside her apartment and dragged back to Louisiana anyway
2. Styx and Mel's Louisiana Vacation Part Deux, a sequel to Styx and Sam's Louisiana Vacation (2023)
3. Abandon Mel, return to Louisiana alone
4. Return to Castle Warwick and command Mother to let him hide in her weed dungeon until the Vermont PD pick him up. The lockup in Rutland is probably better than the lockup in New Orleans anyway
5. Kill himself

WWSD (What Would Stolas Do?)

 

[Stunner900]

Tarl now has 5 options:

1. Stay put at Mel's, get tased in the street outside her apartment and dragged back to Louisiana anyway
2. Styx and Mel's Louisiana Vacation Part Deux, a sequel to Styx and Sam's Louisiana Vacation (2023)
3. Abandon Mel, return to Louisiana alone
4. Return to Castle Warwick and command Mother to let him hide in her weed dungeon until the Vermont PD pick him up. The lockup in Rutland is probably better than the lockup in New Orleans anyway
5. Kill himself

WWSD (What Would Stolas Do?)

6. He does kill self by cop

Edit: though let’s be honest Tarl doesn’t want to kill himself, he only uses the words as bait so he can control/manipulate Mommy and his BPD Hoe Harem.

 

[Leylon Sneed]

They would have still issued the warrant, he was meant to show up in person and the Judge has clearly been briefed on the Vermont situation as well. He was fucked no matter what.

He wouldn't have been able to piss the judge off by trying to bullshit them about the Vermont charges. When you start becoming a frequent flyer in certain courts the judge will recognize your case when it's on their docket, if you a generally candid with the court, this can work in your favor, when you try to bullshit them, skip court, pretend to have seizures and technical issues, they may not remember all of the details, but they do remember that you treated them like they were stupid. I have a feeling that even if his warrant is revoked because he makes it down to LA next week, he probably won't be getting a bond until his next hearing.

 

[White Christmas]

Tarl now has 5 options:

1. Stay put at Mel's, get tased in the street outside her apartment and dragged back to Louisiana anyway
2. Styx and Mel's Louisiana Vacation Part Deux, a sequel to Styx and Sam's Louisiana Vacation (2023)
3. Abandon Mel, return to Louisiana alone
4. Return to Castle Warwick and command Mother to let him hide in her weed dungeon until the Vermont PD pick him up. The lockup in Rutland is probably better than the lockup in New Orleans anyway
5. Kill himself

WWSD (What Would Stolas Do?)

Wow, he FKd himself again, in true narc fashion.

Time to turn his Nutty Tarl autobiography into the Diary of Tarl Frank.

He is so afraid of jail that he's going to be hiding out in this retarded jewish girl's attic for the next 10 years, living on goy slop behind a false wall, to hide from the cops.

Anne Frank at 12 years old had more balls than Thharl.

 

[General Insomnia]

He wouldn't have been able to piss the judge off by trying to bullshit them about the Vermont charges. When you start becoming a frequent flyer in certain courts the judge will recognize your case when it's on their docket, if you a generally candid with the court, this can work in your favor, when you try to bullshit them, skip court, pretend to have seizures and technical issues, they may not remember all of the details, but they do remember that you treated them like they were stupid. I have a feeling that even if his warrant is revoked because he makes it down to LA next week, he probably won't be getting a bond until his next hearing.

Probably doesn't help the judge's mood to see randoms show up in Zoom, some with names like Rutland Herald and Burlington Free Press.

Also, she's a black woman from the south, I can only imagine how much restraint it must take her to remain calm.

 

[TheTurdReich]

Probably doesn't help the judge's mood to see randoms show up in Zoom, some with names like Rutland Herald and Burlington Free Press.

Also, she's a black woman from the south, I can only imagine how much restraint it must take her to remain calm.

Anyone would be annoyed and tired of the fucking clown show dealing with the vampirate creates but knowing he's getting smacked around by a pissed off ebony queen makes it doubly hilarious

 

[Chongqing]

Tarl now has 5 options:

1. Stay put at Mel's, get tased in the street outside her apartment and dragged back to Louisiana anyway
2. Styx and Mel's Louisiana Vacation Part Deux, a sequel to Styx and Sam's Louisiana Vacation (2023)
3. Abandon Mel, return to Louisiana alone
4. Return to Castle Warwick and command Mother to let him hide in her weed dungeon until the Vermont PD pick him up. The lockup in Rutland is probably better than the lockup in New Orleans anyway
5. Kill himself

WWSD (What Would Stolas Do?)

I think the best thing to do would be to turn himself in to his home county jail / police station or whatever and hope that they keep him in jail there, keeping him out of New Orleans jail.

Surely he can't get on a plane to New Orleans right now to appear in court on Monday to get the bench warrant dropped because he would be stopped and arrested by TSA at the airport, right?

 

[TheTurdReich]

I think the best thing to do would be to turn himself in to his home county jail / police station or whatever and hope that they keep him in jail there, keeping him out of New Orleans jail.

Surely he can't get on a plane to New Orleans right now to appear in court on Monday to get the bench warrant dropped because he would be stopped and arrested by TSA at the airport, right?

He has an extradition warrant; any law enforcement he interacts with will send him to New Orleans to be dealt with.

 

[TerminalBlueIce]

I think the best thing to do would be to turn himself in to his home county jail / police station or whatever and hope that they keep him in jail there, keeping him out of New Orleans jail.

Surely he can't get on a plane to New Orleans right now to appear in court on Monday to get the bench warrant dropped because he would be stopped and arrested by TSA at the airport, right?

If New Orleans was uppity enough about him they would ask NYC or Rutland to put a hold on his ass once he was booked and back in the system pinging the other courts. I heard of a guy who was booked overnight in North Carolina for a totally new charge but because of an existing warrant in NY state, they sent a van down to scoop him up back to NY. Then they added $4000 in travel expenses to his court fees for his "transit."

 

[Locust Day]

I have a feeling that even if his warrant is revoked because he makes it down to LA next week, he probably won't be getting a bond until his next hearing.

An alias capias doesn't include a bond amount and, from what I'm reading, it customarily means the offender picked up on one is held without bond until their court appearance.

 

[Dumbledore's Onlyfans]

He has an extradition warrant; any law enforcement he interacts with will send him to New Orleans to be dealt with.

I imagine the transition into jail is much gentler from Rutland PD than it is in NYPD Booking. I'd probably try to get back to Rutland by road, although idk if I'd risk taking the bus. He can't rent a car. I'd try to convince someone with a car to take me, but I don't think he has anybody in NY who'd be willing to drive a toothless and stinky fugitive who is dressed like a pirate all the way to Vermont.

The real question isn't what I'd do, or any rational person would do, or even what Tarl would do. The real question is what Stolas will make Tarl do.

If New Orleans was uppity enough about him they would ask NYC or Rutland to put a hold on his ass once he was booked and back in the system pinging the other courts. I heard of a guy who was booked overnight in North Carolina for a totally new charge but because of an existing warrant in NY state, they sent a van down to scoop him up back to NY. Then they added $4000 in travel expenses to his court fees for his "transit."

The gentler handling available in Vermont is probably not worth $4,000 though.

 

[Ghostface Killah]

I imagine the transition into jail is much gentler from Rutland PD than it is in NYPD Booking. I'd probably try to get back to Rutland by road, although idk if I'd risk taking the bus. He can't rent a car. I'd try to convince someone with a car to take me, but I don't think he has anybody in NY who'd be willing to drive a toothless and stinky fugitive who is dressed like a pirate all the way to Vermont.

The real question isn't what I'd do, or any rational person would do, or even what Tarl would do. The real question is what Stolas will make Tarl do.

The gentler handling available in Vermont is probably not worth $4,000 though.

I'd do it for $2500 and a punch in his face. Mostly for the punch in the face though.

 

[break these cuffs]

Some more research material for Tarl about his soon to be peers. Here's an interview with a guy from Brooklyn who did a year in the parish jail. According to this guy they had 10 man cells and shit there is so wild dudes had handguns on em.

He needs to kiester his glock or at least a blunderbuss.

 

[Sweet Esther]

I'd do it for $2500 and a punch in his face. Mostly for the punch in the face though.

You might also get a souvenir... tooth.

 

[TerminalBlueIce]

State governments with any inkling of integrity will typically require their counties with jails to post a spreadsheet of their commissary items and prices so that totally assed out indigent inmates can have family order soap and toothpaste for them. The fact that they just make families cast money into this murky hole of third party jail banking companies without any transparency is going to rustle Styx's jimmies when all of his benefactors are asking why they have to install the shadiest unreliable Chinesium apps on their phone to talk with him in jail.
I hope you're reading this Styx. The commissary drop deadline day in Orleans Parish is on Wednesday so book yourself no later than Friday so you can spend your mandatory 72 hours in the drunk tank cells up front before they issue you your flippy floppies and laundry bag full of your spare onesie, towel, washcloth, and tiny Bob Barker soap and tootpaste and four inch toothbrush. If you ask guards nicely they will give you a shitty romance novel to read and a pen and paper (the pen is just a disassembled ballpoint tube only that you'll have to wrap the paper around so you you can use it with your hand and not just your fingertips). You'll need that to fill out your commissary order as you punch it in item by item in the pod phone. Don't be surprised if they fuck up your order.

 

[Tony Ducks]

Silly pirate. The Frenchies are few

Prison is much more highly regulated than jail.

The two quotes above are very accurate, and if Tarl has any common sense left (he doesn't), he should get on the first plane and show up tricorne hat in hand, begging for any sort of lenience he can get. I guess he can always fake another seizure and ask for a single cell due to being a gay, retarded vampirate, but i'm not sure that's going to work. Frenchies will be the least of problems. He might as well ditch Stolas and start praying to Jamal, cause i don't see any whites standing up for him. In prison, people are used to a certain routine. They want to go about their business and do their time. Especially on low level yards. Jails are fucked! People with DUIs and random petty misdemeanors are housed alongside chomos, rapists and guys with multiple murder convictions. Now throw in some gangs, some drugs and a pasty manchild from Vermont and let your imagination go wild.

 

[Lukie]

Something just occurred to me. As Styx has a habit of cutting himself they aren't going to give him a fabric jumpsuit.

Niggas are going to be ripping the paper rags off of him!