Share Your School Stories - Weirdos, freaks, and idiots (self-inclusion optional)

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Not exactly a school story so much as a wonderful tail of post school karma. I used to get bullied a lot in high school, mostly because I was tall, skinny and not given to violence so I was an easy target. The main perpetrator was one of those people who could get away with ANYTHING, he had a way with words and two large an imposing friends who would back him up to teachers, whatever his excuse was. He made my life miserable. Fast forward fifteen years and I happened to find out the other day that he is now VERY skilled at what he does, which is being a nearly dead homeless heroin addict deadbeat dad with three kids by three ugly women.
At first I thought this was gonna be one of those copypastas where somebody pretends to tell their own story but they're actually telling a story of a famous character. I thought you were going to say you became champion of the wizarding world and one of the bullies friends blew themselves up with magic fire.

Still that is poetic justice at its finest my friend.
 
I had a teacher that one day just refused to come to work. Faculty called, county called. Basically told everyone to fuck off. We had a sub that only had the job to pay the rent while training to be an EMT that let us watch movies for the rest of the year.

That same teacher would also bring this bigass potted plant to and from school every day. I don't know why. Before she went AWOL she broke a foot after accidentally dropping the plant on it while taking it out of school for the weekend.
 
When I was a senior, there was this junior who was an overweight emo girl who liked me. She would always try to talk to me but i never gave the fatty a chance.
One day decide fuck it, I bet I can get some laughs so I talk to her.
She blabs about her shitty music and how nightmare before Christmas and Edward Scissorhands are good then tells me about her death journal and how she writes how she's going to torture and kill people from school because they're preps and what not.
i just nod and say alrighty then go home because I was only in school until 12.
She finds me on FB and tells me how much she likes me and if I'd like to be her boyfriend I just straight up tell her "nah nigga" next day find out from a mutual friend that she put me in her death journal and she would stare at me menacingly in the halls, she did this for about a month or so. The last thing i ever said to her was "you know I can walk faster than you can furiously waddle right?"
 
Reading recent posts involving substitute teachers, I feel compelled to share a few experiences of mine involving subs:

In 5th grade, our teacher would spend about a half hour after lunch reading to us from a book. Once the story ended, she moved on to another one.

At one point, she read us a story titled Thirteen Ways to Sink a Sub. Without being too spoilerly, the TL;DR summary is: a class decides to see what antics they can successfully pull off against their substitute teacher. Shortly after that story ended, most of my classmates decided to try the same thing the next time we had a substitute. Needless to say, everyone got in trouble, even those who didn't misbehave, and we all had to write the sub an apology letter. Interesting twist: the sub was the aunt of one of my classmates.
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At my elementary school, the 8th grade class participated in a 2-3 day retreat during the winter. The class was split in half so each half went on a separate retreat, the first half did it one week and the other half did it the following week. Best friends were deliberately placed in opposite halves so we would interact with classmates with whom we didn't regularly interact.

When the opposite half of my class was on retreat, we had a very heavyset sub teaching our class. During one of our morning classes, she presented our lesson and gave us our assignment. I finished it right away. I also managed to finish what other assignment(s) we were given before time was up, so I put my head down on my desk to be quiet and not distract everyone else until our next period.

The sub comes up to me and she insists that I need to finish my assignment. I told her I did. She then says I should work on my other homework. I tell her that's also done and she refuses to believe me. She once again tells me I need to do my classwork. As she walked away, I was so flustered, I blurted out something along the lines of, "I already did, tubby submarine!" She must not have heard me because it would have been an automatic detention or suspension if she did.
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In high school, I had an advanced writing class where the teacher was chill and loved by practically everyone that had her regardless of their label (prep, nerd, etc.). Because this class was an upper-level class, we were treated like college students where most of the time we were free to do as we pleased with our assignments so long as we met our deadlines. This included being able to go to the library or to our locker simply by writing our name on the board and our destination. She was so well-liked nobody ever abused the privilege.

One day, we have an older sub who might have had an Italian name and corresponding accent. He tells us what's in the lesson plan for us to do and half the class immediately signs out to go elsewhere. I wanted to go to my locker to get my class journal (an ongoing assignment where we had to write about certain topics on and off and got credit for what and how we wrote). He wouldn't let me, or anyone else left in the room, sign out at that point. I guess he figured somebody had to stay in class to keep him company.
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If I shared this in a previous post, bear with me. I'll focus more on the substitute teacher aspect here.

My senior year, I had Advanced Placement (AP) English. For brevity, I'll just say the regular teacher was rather mean. As a result, few students were disappointed when we learned she suffered an unexpected and major health issue that I believe ended her teaching career prematurely.

The only problem is that the school didn't have a long-term sub to replace her with, so the following weeks saw multiple subs come and go without really teaching us anything significant. Sure, we'd be asked to read or write something, but the instruction given was minimal at best. Eventually, we had what everyone thought would be our final sub for the year. She gave us an assignment to see where we were writing-wise and used that to develop a new syllabus and bullet points of what she wanted to see us accomplish. Of course, she gets replaced with two months before the end of the year. *sigh*

I believe our last sub got hired as the original teacher's permanent replacement. Despite her well-intentions and doing her best to work with us, the class was ill-prepared for the AP exam because each teacher emphasized something different (or nothing at all) and we struggled to deal with the ensuing lack of structure and consistency. When the AP exam came, I felt unprepared for the questions we were asked. It seemed like less than half us got a score high enough to earn college credit even though all of us were smart enough to pass at that level had we received the proper instruction.
 
At high school we weren't allowed footballs on the playground so had to use these 5 inch rubber balls instead, hard as hell. Pelted one which ended up hitting french teacher in the eye and she had to wear glasses to read after that. Felt well bad and she kept cursing at me in french for the next year with myself only understanding the occasional word here and there. Good times.
 
One day my sophomore year of high school my friend went to the restroom and on the wall found a hysterical picture. A paraprofessional at my school had his face replace the Hungry Hippos faces on the game board box. Guy was huge but we laughed our asses off and my teacher was such a cool guy, hid it in his desk so we can laugh at it whenever we want.
 
In gym class in 10th grade, we were playing volleyball that week and me and like 3 of my friends hated it so the gym teacher who was kind of a bitch let us walk on the upper track for the whole hour and we dared my friend to pole dance on a pole in the corner of the mezzanine. And the gym teacher noticed and got bitched at so much for it and me and my friend burst out laughing.
There was this kid who revolved his personality around being Gay and being a Wiccan, I had the displeasure of having him in most of my classes in high school, he would even ask guys if they liked men and by 10th-11th grade most of the school hated him mainly because he was such a creep and only was friends with the most non conformist including autists. Apparently he now works for a Music publisher in NYC.
Then In 11th grade the school backed up to a water tower where kids would notoriously smoke weed on the long half mile trail leading to it, one day me and my friend were fucking around after school walking around on it doing nothing, and a teacher comes up and assumes we were smoking weed and asks "where's our buddies" and we honestly didn't know, then he goes thru our shit and makes up empty our pockets and we were let go.
Back in 2007 in 7th grade My friend pretended to pole danced and humped a street sign so much that it fell down and a new one was put up a week later whenever I go past that street I always think of that. then I tried to get him to do it again but some guy comes out and starts screaming at the top of his lungs WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING YOU FUCKING BITCH MOTHERFUCKER.
Then a couple months later This girl got off her bus and I was standing on a corner and I startled her idk what I did, then she starts bolting and falls in the street then goes to her house and I had no clue who she was or where she lived, like 10 minutes later I'm walking down the next block and I hear someone say 'THERE HE IS" now and I look across the street and shes standing on her porch pointing me out and her dad is standing there wielding a baseball bat and I see him and sees me and I start sprinting like crazy and he starts to chase me "COME HERE BITCH" and He chases me for like 2 blocks then like 5 minutes I see his van circling a parking lot and I ran so fast home.
 
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At high school we weren't allowed footballs on the playground so had to use these 5 inch rubber balls instead, hard as hell.

In my elementary school, we could play touch football, but we had to use Nerf footballs for safety reasons. Of course, this didn't stop one particular lunch monitor from hassling us whenever she could. I'll call her MM (for mean monitor).

Our parking lot would be blocked off for the school to use for recess. The portion the upper grades used for football had a small chip or hole in the concrete. Any time someone found it while running and lost their balance, MM would make us give up our Nerf football because we were being "too rough" in causing a classmate to fall -- even if the person tripped on the hole of their own inattention without anyone touching him or her. One particular recess, MM took away our ball and then yelled at us for standing around and doing nothing. After we chose to play football with a snowball, she yelled at us again for that. wow

My 8th grade year, our parish priest came to our class to tell us that someone apparently found MM's home address, went to her house on Devil's Night, and flung bologna all over it and her family's property. He further said that if nobody came forward, he'd eventually start questioning us students one on one. When he commented that MM's family deserved to be treated fairly, my teen self had to bite his lip and not react in disgust. MM was far from fair on the playground - not that it justified a lame Devil's Night prank - so that comment struck a nerve, and I found myself wanting to be questioned just to tell Father that she would treat her kids and their classmates differently than the rest of us (and that was probably why someone chose to prank her family like that).

As an example of her double-standards, I was sent to school without a jacket one Spring day because it was 50-60 outside (10-15 Celsius). MM made me stand up against a wall during recess for not having a jacket, but she didn't discipline a student who was a classmate of her oldest kid despite that kid not wearing a jacket either. In short, she was the type who'd look for any reason, no matter how trifling, to yell at or punish someone during recess unless it was someone in one of her kid's classes - then, she'd turn a blind eye and do nothing.

Anyways, it turned out some 7th grader and his high school-aged brother were named as the alleged culprits behind the bologna incident. So, nobody in my class was questioned as far as I know. After the incident, my best friend at the time typed up a complaint about MM on behalf of our class with examples of some of the other things she said or did that our class took issue with. We did our best to make sure it had an appropriate tone, but our teacher threw it away upon reading because she didn't think it was appropriate for us to write it. This shocked us; our 8th grade teacher was rather cool and most of us liked and respected her a great deal. To have legitimate concerns dismissed like that demoralized us. Of course it didn't stop us from making fun of MM behind her back when nobody could see or hear it. :evil:
 
One of the teachers got busted for cheese pizza on his school laptop. I don't know if he was just that stupid or too cocky from not being caught for how long. I dunno what his "age preference" was or how old the kids in it were, but I'd guess pretty young considering he worked with about 15-17 y/o's so he probably wouldn't "tempt himself". Stupid bastard had tenure and was merely forced into retirement instead of being thrown to the wolves and ripped a new asshole in prison like he should have been. He has a son (Late edit: forgot to mention the son is a fucking adult man substitute teacher) who all the girls had suspicions of, and I guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
Between 8th-12th grade at least four girls got knocked up.
Some sped took a shit out of the toilet and spread it all over the walls of the bathroom. I'm talking all over. Stalls, walls, sinks, urinals, hazmat had to come in and it was roped off for a solid month or two.

Hick school.
 
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In middle school we had a shooting out side 10 feet way away at a basketball court over the rules of H.O.R.S.E. A week later it turns out a substitute teacher was involved in it and once they searched his car he found out he had 2 kilos of cocaine in his car. A half of month later one of teachers that gave him a recommendation was buster for having cocaine in her car. We also had speds chase a girl down a hall nude once.

In High School there was a point that there was so many fights that some of the teachers would take bets with the students on who would win. I had a friend once get caught in a pregnancy thing. The girl didn't know who the Father really was so she slept with a bunch of guys in a short period to try to trick one of them into thinking they where pregnant was kinda dumb.
 
One of the teachers got busted for cheese pizza on his school laptop.

At first I couldn't figure out why pizza on a laptop would cause trouble, unless the pizza somehow messed up the keyboard or laptop components.

Then, I realized this is likely a word filter for child pron. At least I got a good laugh out of this filter. :lol:
 
Went to the Art Institute (I know, rip off and for profit school) and one of the culinary students was dumb enough to mix bleach and ammonia. They had to evacuate the whole building, but I was in the main building and saw a firetruck and students gathered outside in the parking lot.

Of of the culinary students had a sister who was in summer school who attended the same high school I used to go to, and I'm not sure if she was ditching or got to leave early, but she was abducted and murdered while walking home.

In 4th grade, on the last day of school, I was playing 4-square and was mad when I got out, so I bounced the ball super hard and one of the other kids, who was pretty fat and was like a head taller than me even though we were in the same grade, started calling me a witch, so I fucking snapped and began to hit him as hard as I could. I don't really remember what happened after, just that I couldn't participate in the end of year activities and was put in the classroom with all the other bad kids (my teacher and the teacher who had that room often collaborated with each other and were known as the strictest teachers at the school, one was an old man who was my teacher, he was missing parts of his fingers, and the other was a woman who looked like a bitch). When you got sent to that room, the lights were all out and you had to keep your head down on the desk. We were supervised by this sub they always used who looked like Shaggy from Scooby-Doo but ugly and who always wore the exact same clothes every time we had him, a brown t-shirt and ugly brown pants, I thought he was a spaz.

In 3rd grade, I found a white rock that could mark up the blacktop, so I took to writing cuss words like "fuck" really big and I got caught. I got sent to the vice principal or principal, don't remember which, and they called my dad and I had to tell him what I did. I was crying because I hated getting in trouble.

I went to high school in the very early 2000's and I was constantly bullied by a few people in one specific teacher's classroom. One day, these wiggers asked if I was gonna shoot up the school and I told them yes, and they'd be the first ones I'd shoot. They shut up and never told anyone. Another girl who pretended to be my friend, was throwing Skittles at me and it pissed me off enough where I shouted I wish she'd get hit by a car at her. She acted so fucking scared and they sent us to a school counselor to work it out and she pretended like I said I was personally gonna kill her. Some stupid nog stole my graphing calculator which had some dead pixels on it. I didn't know he stole it until I saw him take playing with it so I asked to see it and said thanks for giving me back my calculator. He got pissed and so we both got sent to the office. A campus security guard showed in a mostly full golf cart because were at the farthest end of the school and the stupid nog took the last seat even though I was wearing a dress and a heels and the golf cart left me behind and I walked all the way to the office, saw no one, and joined my friends at second lunch. I got to skip the rest of class, but I was pretty upset by the whole thing.

This pretty long so I'll come back with more.
 
I was expelled from my high school sophomore year since I was letting other students give me blank VHS tapes so that I could return those tapes to them the next day with tentacle hentai on them. One of those students was exceptional enough to pop one of those tapes in the VCR that was in the classroom, then led the staff to me when he did not want to take the heat.

Still, I remember how fun it was back in the ‘90s when none of the video stores had any idea of exactly what they were selling to me back then. Looking back at it now, the whole situation was extremely autistic, with autism coming from everybody involved, including myself.
 
There was this trash family that went to my school. It was this fat blonde woman whose skin was as pink as a pig. She had three daughters, Anne Marie, Crystal and Carol. Sometimes when my grandfather didn't drive us we'd take the city bus since it was a bit of a hike to the school bus before we moved closer to my grandparents house. And fat mama would be on the bus being loud and obnoxious.

Now I didn't really feel like the girls were trash. Just their family. Every one of them got left back in early grades. Which should tell you something right there.

Anne Marie was supposed to be a year ahead of me. But she got left back in second grade. So we ended up in the same class.. I became friends with her and she wasn't dumb. I think she just failed math. I also sucked at math and we had to go to summer school together. It's the only subject I could never get the hang of.:(

So Anne Marie was the best off of these three girls. Just bad at one subject. It seems like the further down the line you went the worse off the kids in that family were.

Crystal was in my year but was left back in first grade. She was not very smart. A nice girl. But as dumb as a bag of rocks. I think the teacher was too hard on her. She had a lot of trouble comprehending directions. She once got in trouble for doing a coloring page wrong and I actually felt really bad for her. She colored a man's face purple. And the teacher comes over and tells her she was doing it wrong and starts yelling "When's the last time you saw someone with a purple face?"

This normally nice teacher had no patience for Crystal. Yet she was able to put up with a bunch of Polish immigrant kids who barely spoke English and were all vying for #1 class clown at the same time.:\

I was not surprised when Crystal got left back. My mom thought getting left back in first grade was bad. Especially since I became deathly ill that year and missed a bunch of school yet still got to the second grade just fine.

The school really lacked resources or give a damn for the learning disabled. Although we had CORA services I don't think these girls ever went. I went for math and my crummy home life. And I never saw those girls there or heard that they went. It was a great way to get out of that awful music class with that mean lardo teacher so I relished it.

The youngest girl, Carol, was in the same year as my brother. So two years behind me. Carol was the worst of all. She was true sped. I think she may have been borderline exceptional. She was left back in kindergarten. They usually don't do that unless you are so emotionally ill prepared for real school that they can't really do anything else. My brother had told me that she was left back because she was a baby. So coming from the mouth of a five year old that likely meant she acted like one. We had "babies" in my class too but we all made it to first grade. So Carol must have been really immature. Luckily for her she was also pretty small for her age and probably blended right in with the new crop of kindergartners. You know how hard five year olds can be on kids that still act like toddlers. Once you get to kindergarten that feeling that you are a big kid really sets in.

The next year Carol was in first grade and she seemed to have not really grown much if at all. She was very loud and ran around a lot. She was really immature but I guess they couldn't hold her back again. She was definitely very toddler-like and wore on your nerves fast.

I think the family moved away after awhile. So I don't know what happened to them.

But imagine you have three kids and they all get left back in early grades. I know parents whispered about them being the "dumb family". But the mom was dumber than dirt so what can you expect? Imagine Mama June. But getting even less oxygen at birth.
 
While going through some old files the other day I came across I photo I took of my high school logo back in my Freshman year. The logo was a never-ending source of amusement to us because around that year, the word broke out that there was some rather unintentional imagery in the design. A few things actually, as a lot of people swore that the pirate was smoking a joint. Appropriate, as we were a school with a notoriously high stoner population. But the real kicker wasn't that, it had to do with the pirate's hat. At first I thought people were just making shit up but once you see it you can't ever unsee it.

Not a :powerlevel: becasue this is a logo used by a bunch of high schools not just ours, but just to be safe I'm using one from another high school where the joke is most obvious.
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Do you see what all the commotion was about? Let's make it a bit easier to see.
a more obvious look at the logo.jpg
We were so proud of our joint-smoking flaccid dong-hat pirate. Our school was eventually forced to change up the logo after the administrators discovered said flaccid hat-dong (After about a year of wondering why people were drawing something dripping out of the hat), but all they did was remove the tear in the pirate's hat. So now they have an uncircumcised flaccid hat-dong whose exposed head will remain in the memory of students old enough to remember it.
 
While going through some old files the other day I came across I photo I took of my high school logo back in my Freshman year. The logo was a never-ending source of amusement to us because around that year, the word broke out that there was some rather unintentional imagery in the design. A few things actually, as a lot of people swore that the pirate was smoking a joint. Appropriate, as we were a school with a notoriously high stoner population. But the real kicker wasn't that, it had to do with the pirate's hat. At first I thought people were just making shit up but once you see it you can't ever unsee it.

Not a :powerlevel: becasue this is a logo used by a bunch of high schools not just ours, but just to be safe I'm using one from another high school where the joke is most obvious.
Do you see what all the commotion was about? Let's make it a bit easier to see.
We were so proud of our joint-smoking flaccid dong-hat pirate. Our school was eventually forced to change up the logo after the administrators discovered said flaccid hat-dong (After about a year of wondering why people were drawing something dripping out of the hat), but all they did was remove the tear in the pirate's hat. So now they have an uncircumcised flaccid hat-dong whose exposed head will remain in the memory of students old enough to remember it.

Haha, I was about to say this looked a lot like my old high school’s logo! I don’t think ours had the flaccid dick look, but it probably was the same besides that! In our school’s gym though, whoever painted the letters to our gym’s slogan that included “pirate’s” in it, painted it as “pirates’” and then painted over the mistake in white, meaning it’s still very much visible on that wall.
 
In my senior year, there was this one kid at our school (I think he was a junior at the time idc) He was this gay husky/pudgy looking guy. He went to the Vocational Tech school like the majority of the students during the morning and came back at the 6th period lunch. However, he was the only guy to go to the tech school for a cosmo license. He was known for being openly (and tbh radically) gay. Like this dude came into school everyday with over the top makeup that not even the thots at our school would wear (and they plastered their faces with it) He also shaved his eyebrows completely and wwould draw them on pink/blue or the gay flag idk. dyed his buzzcut hair in a tint of hot pink, talked like a retarded dragqueen (And on social media talked like a fucking baby)
ALSO HE WORE A FUCKING DRESS TO HOMECOMING I PISSED MYSELF WHEN HEARD ABOUT THAT

Well so apparently one morning when the VocTech kids were on their morning bus to the Tech school, he apparently TOOK A SHIT, YES AN ACTUAL LIVE SHIT at his seat, in the back of the bus. One of my friends was actually at the seat across from him and is like a PTSD victim when I try to ask him to explain what happened. Well apparently there was even a video of it , I never got to see it, but my friend had it and lost it after a while. I find this so fucking hilarious even thinking about it now.
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Soon, right after holiday break ended, He made the Voc bus wait for him because he had 'poop probs :((' again, some of my friends were really irritated because they just wanted to get to lunch and the bus actually ended up being super late, almost missing lunch.
Yea so my bf at the end of the day, on his schoolbus back home was talking to our other friends about the whole thing, my bf thinks the gay culture is disgusting (i mean same tho) and while talking and laughing about it with the others, A girl, who was the "shitkid's" friend, was on that bus, and recorded part of the converstaion and sent it to him on snapchat. You could hear my bf saying in the vid reffering shitkid as "Everything I hate about society all in one package". the girl recording put the caption as my bfs full name and where he lives in their neighborhood aswell.

So you know Shitkid is a big man... Freely posting the video on his public insta telling people to harrass him at his house, and making a 2 hour long insta live stream where he just walks around his house, petting his cat, and spreading bullshit garbage about how 'tough he is' and then instantly acting depressed because he isnt the GSA club president (my friend is and she's the most rational gsa member ever ) and then spurting on how he's going to fuck up my bf. all his instagram comments on the dox post were all supportive of him and calling him "BRAVER THAN A US SOLDIER".

my bf isnt a tough kid, he's not that type of guy to get into fights and just wanted this whole thing to die down. So when we got back to school on monday, he wasnt confronting my bf, he was honestly hiding scared behind the one girl and another girl.

so my bf got called into the principles office, and apparently, he didnt get into trouble luckily, apparently the principle even agreed with my bf. The girl got suspended for I think a week and got faced charges (?) for filming without consent. and shitkid got suspended for 3 days.

And what makes this whole story just fucking hilarious was that Shitkid supposedly dropped out of school shortly after and went to cyberschool because he was "Harrassed and Bullied"

The best part to me is obviously the shit story, but it makes the story a happy ending heearng the fucker got "Bullied into cyberschool"
 
Freshmen and Sophomores had to share lockers at my high school. Both of the people I shared lockers with were allegedly involved with things that led me to be questioned by the sheriffs office and local police.

The first one was "urban," and allegedly a gang member. We were one of those schools that bussed kids in from the city to be more diverse so I guess it was possible. He was actually a nice dude. The sheriff and school discipline officer questioned me and asked if I ever saw anything suspicious or alarming, which I didn't.

The second person was a gay kid who taped pictures of a Ford Windstar (a minivan) to the inside of the locker door. He just stopped coming to school one day. About a week after I last saw him, the police came to school and again I was pulled into a room with the school discipline officer. It turns out that he and his younger brother were calling in bomb threats to schools (we had about 4 at our school in the span of a month). They also set fire to a building at our local park. They wanted to know if he ever talked about his plans with me, or noticed him acting really weird, which I didnt. He did seem a little weird overall, but it was typical high school weirdness.

The only good thing to come of this was that the school discipline guy bought me McDonald's for lunch one day to thank me for my cooperation.
 
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