Red Letter Media

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Favorite recurring character? (Select 4)

  • Jack / AIDSMobdy

    Votes: 257 24.0%
  • Josh / the Wizard

    Votes: 77 7.2%
  • Colin (Canadian #1)

    Votes: 460 42.9%
  • Jim (Canadian #2)

    Votes: 230 21.4%
  • Tim

    Votes: 386 36.0%
  • Len Kabasinski

    Votes: 208 19.4%
  • Freddie Williams

    Votes: 274 25.5%
  • Patton Oswalt

    Votes: 27 2.5%
  • Macaulay Culkin

    Votes: 541 50.4%
  • Max Landis

    Votes: 64 6.0%

  • Total voters
    1,073
RLM's problem is falling for mystery box storytelling and not doing their jobs as critics because of Lucas derangement syndrome.

In 2015, nobody expected that Disney would blow four billion dollars on acquiring Star Wars, then allow its writers to set up mysteries to which there were no answers. The expectation was there had to be a series bible or outline that would provide structure and conclusions to whatever questions the first installment posed ... because if they didn't do that, then you were going to get trainwrecks like The Last Jedi and The Force Awakens The Rise of Skywalker. And that would be suicide.

That this turned out to be exactly what happened is one of the great entertainment scandals of the 21st century, and I'm very sorry the Great Oracles of Milwaukee failed to predict it.
 
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In 2015, nobody expected that Disney would blow four billion dollars on acquiring Star Wars, then allow its writers to set up mysteries to which there were no answers. The expectation was there had to be a series bible or outline that would provide structure and conclusions to whatever questions the first installment posed ... because if they didn't do that, then you were going to get trainwrecks like The Last Jedi and The Force Awakens. And that would be suicide.

That this turned out to be exactly what happened is one of the great entertainment scandals of the 21st century, and I'm very sorry the Great Oracles of Milwaukee failed to predict it.
Rlm could have looked at the state of Bad Robot Trek at that time, which was Into Darkness, which tbf, they did say it was bad, but assumed it was a one off, not a pattern.
 
Rlm could have looked at the state of Bad Robot Trek at that time, which was Into Darkness, which tbf, they did say it was bad, but assumed it was a one off, not a pattern.
Star Trek Into Darkness - released in 2013.
Disney bought Lucasfilm in 2012.

So RLM should have predicted the consequences of Disney's purchase based upon a movie that would have been released a year later?

it wasnt dry wit. the conversations were jsut random times when they would speak on it, such as a BoTW discussion and it gets brought up. please dont ask me where in the 1000+ hours of BoTW content this happens as i cant pin point it.
Really? They guys have never made dry, sarcastic jokes in the film-talk episodes?

And then watch the conclusion where they say that it's like good Rock music. They make jokes, but they liked it.
I say again - special kind of autism.
 
In 2015, nobody expected that Disney would blow four billion dollars on acquiring Star Wars, then allow its writers to set up mysteries to which there were no answers. The expectation was there had to be a series bible or outline that would provide structure and conclusions to whatever questions the first installment posed ... because if they didn't do that, then you were going to get trainwrecks like The Last Jedi and The Force Awakens The Rise of Skywalker. And that would be suicide.
Yeah....this is a lot of why I find myself affording clemency to the milwaukee heathens with regards to how extraordinarily poorly aged their hopium predictions were at the time.

As I have sperged myself many times, including this very thread, the idea disney with all its money and connections and S tier writers/directors/producers on speed dial would fuck up orders of magnitude worse than the prequels was never even considered, with the bleakest predictions being a competent but generic and beige stream of mostly acceptable pap.

I mean if anyone wants to see just how fucking different the vibe was back then just fucking look at this retard and his take circa late 2013.
1740595749751.png

This past decade has been one long and miserable exercise in learning that the most well funded, respected, experienced and accredited professionals in their industry or institution or polity can and will fuck things up worse than the most retarded and penniless fucking autist on furaffinity
 
I know necro'ing a post that's nearly a year old is faggot behavior, but this:

Its like if they were food critics who gave glowing reviews of a forgettable starter dish because they had high hopes for the main course and dessert, only for the main course to just be a towering mound of nigger shit from which an AIDs infected hobo leapt out to forcibly assfuck the customer while yodelling dixieland, and the dessert to be a comically large bowl containing the semen and haemorrhoid pus of every special needs person in the city of Gary IN collected and fermented over a three and a half week period

... is pure poetry.
 
In 2015, nobody expected that Disney would blow four billion dollars on acquiring Star Wars, then allow its writers to set up mysteries to which there were no answers. The expectation was there had to be a series bible or outline that would provide structure and conclusions to whatever questions the first installment posed ... because if they didn't do that, then you were going to get trainwrecks like The Last Jedi and The Force Awakens The Rise of Skywalker. And that would be suicide.

That this turned out to be exactly what happened is one of the great entertainment scandals of the 21st century, and I'm very sorry the Great Oracles of Milwaukee failed to predict it.
It was also expected that the new trilogy would have to be better than the prequels because whoever would get the project would be answerable to a higher power who want to make money, while Lucas made movies for George Lucas. Instead, Kennedy had a similar approach, letting the directors have more power than was necessary, and it screwed up everything.

I'll defend Abrams in that The Force Awakens, for all its issues, did set up an interesting premise for a trilogy and got people excited for where it was going, while also evoking the feeling of the old movies. Was it perfect? Hell no. Did it do what it was supposed to do? Yes. Had someone else, even Joss Whedon, gotten the job of doing episode eight and built on what was happening, episode nine would have rivaled Endgame for how hyped everyone would be to see what was coming. But the job went to Rian Johnson, a man who is infamous for enjoying pissing off his audience just because he finds it fun.

And as you said, no one saw it coming because what fucking retard would do something that stupid.
 
And as you said, no one saw it coming because what fucking retard would do something that stupid.

It's worth remembering that whatever its shortcomings, The Force Awakens predated the trend of weird studio resentment toward the fanbase, and going out of their way to alienate their traditional audience. That would really start the next year with Lady Ghostbusters, only for The Last Jedi to perfect the formula. TFA was so obviously structured to cater to fandom (in a hamfisted, unsubtle way) that the followup pulling a Ghostbusters truly came out of left field.
 
It's worth remembering that whatever its shortcomings, The Force Awakens predated the trend of weird studio resentment toward the fanbase, and going out of their way to alienate their traditional audience. That would really start the next year with Lady Ghostbusters, only for The Last Jedi to perfect the formula. TFA was so obviously structured to cater to fandom (in a hamfisted, unsubtle way) that the followup pulling a Ghostbusters truly came out of left field.
It was borderline. The media was in full feral mob mode and obsessively turning any random troll on xitter into a weeks long international witchhunt and moral panic as it had been circa gamergate. I remember distinctly being near ground zero when the "FILTHY NAZI BIGOT FANBOY NURD BABIES ARE OUTRAGED AT THE FIRST STUNNINGLY BRAVE BLACK MAN IN STAR TREK WARS!!!" campaign kicked off over trolls calling Boyega a nigger and I actually traced shit back myself to the accounts that kicked it all off and it was literally two accounts with less than a dozen followers created a week or two beforehand. After release there was also the mass choreographed media backlash against anyone calling Rey a Mary Sue, and while I do not remember anyone Disneyside specifically joining the mob I suspect this was where the notion they could bury any and all criticism by screaming bigot or manbaby at the critic started to percolate for them....at least when it came to those involved with the movies.

With regards to those involved with the nu-EU however well.....you had Chuck Wendig and he started squealing and shrieking about how anyone who didnt like his shitty books, which were the literal foundation of said nu-EU as they were the first official disney approved canon followups to the OT, was a nazi bigut nurd yadda yadda yadda you know how this ends.
 
The old star wars book were not good but compared to this...
https://youtube.com/watch?v=UxKojvQqI0g
Ah yes.....the fart orgy that they specifically retconned Princess Leia as having attended and officiated, a fact that upon discovering caused one of the last fleeting freakouts I had about how shit Star Wars had gotten before I finally came to peace with the franchise I once loved shitting itself to death....literally in this case.

I say one of the last because....well there are a fucking lot of these nu-canon lore nuggets we stumbled accross on that thread as we watched the franchise die screaming and shidding before our eyes. For example and quoting myself here, the fact that Tarkin was having a gay affair with stormtrooper TK-421 (i.e. one of the troopers killed in A New Hope who had their armor stolen as a disguise)


Tarkin explicitly wanted to bring him as arm candy back to meet the emperor and be housed in a penthouse where TK-421 could peg Tarkin whenever he desired. Tarkin wanted to blow up yavin specifically because of his death and the subsequent lack of pegging he received.

He also liked to fard and/or shidd in his armor and luke specifically noted this while wearing it, as shown here on wookiepedia....because this is all 1000% canon
1740612316408.png

Again though.....tip of the fucking iceboig here....lord almighty this shit positively buck broke us as we endured it all in real time
 
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Again though.....tip of the fucking iceboig here....lord almighty this shit positively buck broke us as we endured it all in real time

I am very proud of the fact that I have not watched more than brief clips of any post-TLJ Star Wars, and I say this as someone whose first theatrical experience was A New Hope during one of its pre-Return of the Jedi rereleases. I really don't think any franchise has been mismanaged worse or more irreparably, although what I've heard about Doctor Who might give it a run for its money. This stuff about Tarkin is new to me, and I can only shake my head in disgust.
 
In 2015, nobody expected that Disney would blow four billion dollars on acquiring Star Wars, then allow its writers to set up mysteries to which there were no answers.
I did that in 2015 the exact moment I found out that The Darth Vader Ripoff was Han/Leia's kid, the moment they put that "twist" to to paper was the exact moment that all chance of any good in the sequel Trilogy died.
 
I did that in 2015 the exact moment I found out that The Darth Vader Ripoff was Han/Leia's kid, the moment they put that "twist" to to paper was the exact moment that all chance of any good in the sequel Trilogy died.
See, I think they could have thematically done something about nature vs nurture vs fate (this is a series with a predefined Chosen One after all). But nah.
 
See, I think they could have thematically done something about nature vs nurture vs fate (this is a series with a predefined Chosen One after all). But nah.
Nope.

The moment Discount Vader was a Skywalker the entire Trilogy was fucking doomed the fact that they had to go to the "EBIL SKYWALKER TO BE REDEEMED" plot proved that they had no functional ideas to make anything new or interesting in the setting, compare The Legacy EU where we had over 20 Books before they pulled Jacen Solo to the Dark Side.
 
towering mound of nigger shit [...] AIDs infected hobo [...] comically large bowl containing the semen and haemorrhoid pus of every special needs person in the city of Gary IN collected and fermented over a three and a half week period
This is how I see Star Wars pages in my RLM hatewatching sanctum.
So many pages.
Like cheese through the MATI thread.
 
At this point, Nemesis is a better movie than 09
lol. lmao even.

Nemesis deserves the deployment of an actual "History Eraser Button," Ren & Stimpy style, if for no other reason than letting Troi briefly drive another Enterprise (with predictable results) and managing to make the climactic space battle between two of the most heavily-armed and powerful starships in Star Trek history -- both in pristine condition and prepared for combat before the engagement -- the most boring fucking thing ever shown in a movie theater. I legitimately still don't know how they did it.

B-4? Picard on the dune buggy? The useless forcefield surrounding the warp core, which fails instantly (taking the warp core with it) the moment the Enterprise is hit with the first shot in a battle they knew was coming? The Picard clone who needs blood transfusions to live? The bomb that melts the entire Romulan senate all at once? The massive death ship constructed by Romulan slaves that nobody ever noticed? Hardpoint-mounted phaser and disruptor banks that just "run out" after awhile for some reason? Admiral Janeway? "Self-destruct is offline"?

C'mon dude, at least '09 had a few funny moments and some decent acting (particular the tragically-underused Karl Urban's McCoy). Nemesis was an unrelenting heap of shit.
 
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