random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[The Secret Sauce]

I went to California and I deported so many immigrants. In California they just let you do it. They almost deport themselves. I covered my face and everything.

 

[demicolon]

monitors it like a monitor lizard

 

[Click reply to view]

if I got put out of the Nazi propaganda business on account of being outed, I could always become a smut peddler, and start writing gay erotica

 

[Gentlebastard]

I'm not going to read the rest of the article. I want to live in my delusions that there's no way in hell something so retarded could be real.

If it were me I would've permabanned everyone who can't spell 'milquetoast.'

The ancient romans had a law where a citizen who was living especially poorly could be charged with bringing disrepute to Rome. This man brings disrepute to humanity.

I sentence him to a lifetime of being himself, the harshest possible sanction.

I actually get the realpolitik argument for killing the kids (can't leave survivors from the previous dynasty with a claim to the throne for loyalists to rally behind), but its one of those Machiavellian things you do and try not to draw attention to.

(he seems convinced his sack seam and taint are evidence of a vagina spackled over by his parents when he was a child)

Jack fought bravely for our country during Desert Storm in pizzerias across the West coast. And need it be stated that he's fighting multiple wars at any given time? Pizza wars, burger wars, fried chickenshit wars, four+ tours avoiding physical therapy...

I was just in the main news thread and saw that tweet with completely made up bullshit and thought "What a fucking bold-faced lie, and there will probably be some retard who believes it, even though the evidence says the complete opposite."

Well, here we have one such retard.

I always get a kick out of someone quoting a media report about whatever and saying "Why isn't anyone reporting this!" They are man, you just read the report about it

They're like sexist little aliens who've never actually left their spaceship before they started walking around in human skin, which makes the stage productions they call their lives both comedies and tragedies.

"A Tahoe is designed to kill a human in a Ford Fiesta"

omae wa mou shindeirou, child
you are already dead, stalker

After all that "look at me, I'm such a grateful person and good husband, watch me randomly almost cry" posturing, he couldn't even be arsed to find a good* picture of Tammy that he really likes (or is unique or new in some way) to show his viewers.

* Note: Photo may not exist. Terms and conditions apply.

I think I need to get screened for cancer after reading this tweet. Something hurts

 

[naaaaiiiiillllll!!!]

I demand to see the bottoms of those cookies.

 

[Rotollo 2]

Yes he was a bitter jobless furry loser sodomizing other men

 

[Aunt Carol]

That's weird Cherie, because when I summoned the ghost of L. Frank Baum, he said that you were wrong and belonged in a group home.

Just call people niggers and use the ignore button, it isn’t that hard.

"I am a robot alien baby who can only speak through a telepathic bird. Alien robot babies are blind and so am I so I can't leave. Let me just rain dolla-dollla bills on your dinner."

For you, the day Null graced your account with moderator privileges on the now-defunct Tumblr subforum was the most important day of your life.
For Null, it was Tuesday.

You're lucky Paganism didn't stick around for long enough to record Odin's thoughts on race relations.

 

[Mound Dweller]

Because this is the Catholic Thread I will refrain from calling you a racial or Homophobic slur

fuck you, you athority worshiping turbo-nerd. all your friends hate you. you have no idea what fun and joy is. kill yourself

 

[Spectate]

Sorry for the off topic. I’ve tried googling and well, google.
Are all furries gay?

 

[Stan]

We need an exorcist that’s had at least two years residency in ob gyn to deal with this ghost pussy.

 

[Neil]

1 week - Sending unsolicited feet pics in mass DMs while complaining about sexual harassment like a fucking dented retard.

 

[Slideshow Bill]

IF YOU DON'T BRING BACK BOOBS I'M GOING TO SUPPORT MURDERING THE HOMELESS

 

[Nguyen Van Phuoc]

These freaks are on fucking Kiwi Farms and all these legitimate stalker websites

 

[Betonhaus]

this woman is OLD, has WRINKLES, and i would NOT inseminate her dead eggs.

 

[Dr. Butt]

SAY IT WITH ME IN THE BACK, JUST BECAUSE HE """RESPECTED HIS BOUNDRIES""" DOESN'T MEAN HE IS ABSOLVED OF ANY ABUSE HE HAD! IT'S LIKE IF I RAPED SOMEONE AND I TOOK THEM OUT TO DINNER, DOES THAT ABSOLVE ME OF ANY WRONGDOING? YOU GUYS LOVE RAPE, JUST ADMIT YOU'RE A BUNCH OF DEGEN FUJOSHI'S THAT CANNOT HANDLE THE FACT YOUR BOYS LOVE SHIP IS THE DEFNINITION OF TOXIC RELATIONSHIP LIKE EDWARD AND BELLA.

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

I think Twiggs holds the key to this.

 

[Aero the Alcoholic Bat]

The real Null is a lot fatter than that lmao.

 

[Super Mario Brothers]

Built for BKC (Big Kiwi Cock)

 

[DenseDeerFather]

Ah yes; nothing daintifies a moon emoji face quite like an inflated goalie glove trotter hoisting up the bullfrog inflation sacs.

 

[Niggolash]

How the fuck is Juneteen not the 15th. Wouldn't it be Septemberteeth.