random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Dr. Butt]

And then I followed the links and I realised, "Oh it's massacres that are funny."

 

[Aunt Carol]

Life and death are things you just do when you’re bored.

This isn't the first fic I've read where Viktor has had the hex crystals shoved up his vagina, but this one is really dragged down by the sheer moodiness and inconsistent characterization.

 

[Dr. Butt]

90% of all murders are "dude got shot/stabbed and died"

 

[Hitman One]

I don't even live in the UK but if I elaborated on the things I would do to these houses if I lived in that neighborhood they would still send Ofcom to my house to kill me personally.

 

[Dr. Butt]

The show isn't called "Owl Fucker".

 

[Sleazy Car Salesman]

Most of the time when I say racist shit, I'm joking. Not about Indians

My favorite ad of the 2024 cycle was, hands-down, that fucking ludicrous AI-generated one about JD Vance turning into robo-Hitler.

You can put down the alcohol but you can't resurrect the brain cells.

Politics shouldn't be in fish.

Is this how you got butthole cancer?

If I had orbiters this fucking dumb I think I'd leave the Internet in shame.

"Don't you talk about me you son of a bitch!"

"Who said that?"

"It's me, the Vore Connoisseur!"

Tis only a matter of time until Madame Zeroni orders some Latvian Stalker Peasant to carry Fatrick up a mountain every day to violently fuck his ass in vengeance for his crimes against her race

"Yer bang' ter rights, yer corblimey Audi Quattro!"

I plan to plead “not guilty” by reason of “self defense: fat faggot with bitch tits.”

Regular guys may get their cars stolen, his gets crushed under a meteorite shaped like a giant dildo.

Does AI have any applications outside of making cool wallpaper and poor quality porn yet?

At this point, I have nothing but absolute contempt for every race that isn't mine.

Wooks wike Ewon gaht pwayed again. Ewite humon capital, Musk. Bwong.

if he's not whipped then he's gay "bitch you're gonna identity as a man, wear male clothes, call yourself Jax and wear the strap-on i bought you!"

You think triple posters exist because theyre too busy gooning their little penor to Daisy's Destruction to just edit their fucking posts

Do you get a kick out of deliberately missing the point, or does it just happen?

 

[often puzzled]

I know it's her fetish content, but I don't have to be happy about it.

Is that cellulitis? That's so ratchet.

 

[CaddestSlown]

You're alright in my book, faggot.

Thanks! I'm glad we can get along. Cunt.

You're both retarded nigger faggots to me.

 

[Dr. Butt]

They couldn’t even comprehend a concept like Area 51 or The Bermuda Triangle. That is way too advanced for them.

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

indians be like "namaste fellow indian continent chads saars The Lord of the Rings is okay and all but the Prankeep Shitdeep trilogy is such a good better good Bollywood adaptation of the same thing in modern india world setting, you as all know Fistshit Cowdung and Grope Yermam are having be the best of actors known to all mankind, after all there is no topping of the Helms Jeet scene with Yermam riding of a motorcyle through downtown Mumbai very epic much, Saaron is best villain character idea of all, many women raped during production but this is all same as Hollywood slop pranka bingash [some more random shit written in jeetspeak like anyone fucking cares] shaggadabah doodoo bingbong if you get my drift brown brothers "

 

[Dr. Butt]

That shit is passion and sometimes passion looks a little gay, don't be afraid of it.

 

[Aunt Carol]

He’s likely to face rape by deception charges if any bloke realizes he’s fucking a man and not a family of raccoons fighting over ham hock in a garbage sack.

I have a feeling somewhere down the road we're going to end up gassing perfectly nice retarded and disabled people because these freaks have so completely poisoned the well of good will.

In German we have a word for people who only like penises or only vaginas: “Genitalpräferenz”.

 

[Miss Violet Beauregarde]

This is just futanari with extra steps.

 

[KiwiFuzz2]

Be a nigga like Batman but instead of fighting crime he is going to smashing a district attorneys car with a bat screaming like a retard.

I kept saying "sub-urban wait, urban but sub style, wait urban but like country style FUCK. no not suburban like the chevy sub-urban. motherfucker!"

That's the oddest phrasing I've ever seen of "gunshot wound"

Deliberately trying to obfuscate?

Incompetence with a thesaurus?

or ChatGTP at work?

You decide!

DO NOT WATCH PORN OF WORK DEVICES

 

[Clotso Coof]

Singapore is basically Judge Dredd + Race Realism: The City.

 

[Gentlebastard]

Wow, a woman that likes dick. How curious.

Idk why, out of all the gross shit on this site, this is the post that makes me feel sick to my stomach. I can handle the pictures in the SRS thread, but something about the description of how this pooner's infected vagina tasted was just too much for me.

They promised the drawing of the naked woman was "bawdy". I'm extremely disappointed.

He has such a schlubby, five-o'-clock-shadow, hamburger-chompin' look, but he speaks with the vocal equivalent of a raised pinky.

These details would be considered gratuitous and unbelievable if it were fiction. Like. I don’t know why this more than anything drove it home for me that those people live in a literal hell on Earth but good goddamn.

Of course the retarded robot is acting like a retarded robot. That's what it is.

May Vishnu and Muhammed both be tossed in the acid vats The Great Scientist Yakub threw his reject gene-splicing experiments in, nutsack first.

This is what happens when you live in constant unending mortal terror of being alone.

Oh right sorry, I forgot.

every knife wielding maniac has a magic phrase to get them to stop, you just have to figure it out before they stab you

 

[Dr. Butt]

I'm not a homosexual so why would I care about Korea?

 

[Coolio55]

kids have a fixation on the anus and everything to do with it from a young age, sometimes that never goes away

 

[Autistic Asparagus]

She would say NIGGER out loud if she wouldn't get her fat ass beaten to death.

 

[Dr. Butt]

That running gag of everyone wanting to buttsex Sonic in Free Riders was pretty lol. The furry bird sex not so much though.