random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Oliver Onions]

Goes into pro wrestling which is automatically the gayest thing you can do but you know what pal, it’s your dream not mine.

I’m gunna keep reading there’s gotta be more to this than some gay wrestler getting tits.

I do own a lantern, actually.

 

[CansOfCant]

Does the 2nd ammendment cover weaponized autism?

 

[Kirk Van Houten]

If you're ever feeling bad about your appearance, the Farms are the place to go for a confidence boost. We've got cows of every kind of ugly.

 

[Gentlebastard]

I love the game of Chinese whispers they play that turns milquetoast liberal science journo into kiwi farms super soldiers.

He really does spend half his day yelling STEK at various AI programs.

now where is the one where she fell asleep with a dildo up her ass?

I support the extermination of people who remove their mufflers and then brap around like negros at midnight.

I remember Null saying he's Jewish

Sending blacks into Japan to terrorize them like this is a bridge too far, pearl harbor was like a hundred years ago get over it already and stop these attacks.

the fish are becoming entirely to cocky and we need to knock them down a few pegs

Well steven jobs tried to cure his cancer with apples, I'm not all the surprises his AI doesn't know what steak is.

Firefighters are the Swiss army knife of Emergency Services.

 

[CallmeCicada]

Girl you can't even read your own mind, that goes without saying

 

[Sawamura Simp]

Fat millennial women who are obsessed with consumable food mistakenly believe affection for culinary products or caffeinated piss equals a personality.

Pure mental illness.

I can't wait for Project 2025 to finally authorize Goku to drop the spirit bomb on Palestine

Your Likes: People with autism, Pokémon and Benito Mussolini

You're joining MAGA Country soon Canada! Only your NHL Players and Bret Hart are going to be spared from The Day of Rake.

Spoiler: Bonus

Trump is worse than Hitler, he is literally Voldemort therefore he's like Putin

 

[indomitable snowman]

Okay now arrest the fart fetishists

 

[DickMain]

Its like fight club but with more autism

 

[Dr. Butt]

Kill yourself, faggot.

 

[General Emílio Médici]

I have no real evidence to support this, but I'm also 100% sure I'm right.

Whatever this event was, it was what prompted Timmy to study philosophy and dedicate himself to answering the big questions challenging mankind, like whether or not it's ethical to rape animals.

I was like "That's an interesting point Stanislava. I have never considered that all Bosnians should be slaughtered like the pigs they are" and kept working.

 

[Dr. Butt]

"might knit, read HP and love anal"

JOSH IS A BLACK WOMAN?

 

[D_Tractor]

One of my life goals, as in it's on my bucket list, is to snort the cremated ashes of a jew as if it were cocaine, preferably from an alleged "holocaust" victim. So I'm extremely jealous of this ZOG cock sucking niggress. I am the ultimate antisemite. Nobody can hate jews more than me;

 

[Dr. Butt]

I once found a bathroom with a bunch of bean bags.

The state currently doesn't punish people for pre-crimes.

 

[TheRetardKing]

LEAVE ME ALONE, MOM! QUIT BULLYING ME, STEPDAD! *HYPERVENTILATES* I JUST WANT TO GET FAMOUS BY MAKING VIDEOS ABOUT WHY FUCKING ANIMALS IS TOTALLY ETHICAL AND COOL BEHIND A CARTOON PONY AVATAR FROM A SHOW FOR LITTLE GIRLS! I DON'T WANT TO GET A JOB!

 

[Inco G. Nito]

(This man BARBECUED AND ATE other men's testicles who got their nuts chopped off at a nullo home party.)

 

[Silver Higgs]

"BASED BASED BASED DEATH PENALTY BASED DEATH PENALTY FRIVOLOUS SENSELESS VIOLENCE POLICE BRUTALITY HUH BASED BASED YEAH YOU CALL YOURSELVES LEFTISTS AND YOU SUPPORT THIS?"

 

[UERISIMILITUDO]

Gee whiz I sure hope this Tor connection is good.

 

[Aunt Carol]

Life is so much simpler when you're not a fucking retard.

 

[CEO of Gay]

I'm now convinced you jerk off to Diglet.

 

[Rembrandt]

Also, astrology has its own trigger warning now?