random_text.txt / Random Quotes - Back in the day it was literally a text file on the webserver called random_text.txt and now it's a whole thing.

[Oliver Onions]

What a legacy this man has built.

 

[Kirk Van Houten]

A proper gentleman tucks his boner after 10 and/or in mixed company. Sorry for giving away one of our man secrets but it had to be pointed out.

 

[DickMain]

Literally every time I hear something about this big dumb retard it's about him being a bigger and dumber retard than ever before.

 

[Axiom.]

There's no anime toddlers in Son of the Mask.

 

[oopsie doodle]

"Big Bird's aching cloaca" is possibly the most islamic collection of words I've read. Props to him for using accurate anatomy, though.

 

[JustSomeDong]

This is the case that never ends.
Yes it goes on and on, my friends.
Rusty started suing not knowing what it was
And he'll keep on suing Josh forever just because:

This is the case that never ends.
Yes it goes on and on, my friends.
Rusty started suing not knowing what it was
And he'll keep on suing Josh forever just because....

 

[Gentlebastard]

I been reading a lot of retarded things on this website, but this one has to be the most retarded thing I've read this year.

This nigger is quoting Nutty professor like she was presenting a science paper

I just looked outside my window and saw JK Rowling leap from atop a horse-drawn chariot and bury some kind of medieval flail into the head of a passing androgynous person, as a supporting company of bowmen chanted behind her "41% is 59% too low. The Neinfagsgruppe shall right the wrongs".

He's like that obnoxious autist kid I knew when I was 10 who literally spoke in nothing but family guy quotes

That's the best part of prison, the new friends you'll make and the novel situations you'll find yourself in.

I just love knowing there's moms and grandmas shitposting here. Makes me smile everytime, so fucking wholesome.

I had read it originally but I went back for a reread. What an insight into a navel gazing over educated whore.

Edit: I'm retarded. Have I ever told you I'm retarded?

Trisha Paytas is repulsive, but when I heard about her OnlyFans, you better believe I was looking that shit up out of morbid curiosity.

I throbbed with vengeance in my personal area if you know what I mean

Parrots are known for their plumage but in a pinch they're also a great chicken substitute.

No one believes this, but an elderly lady fainted once when she saw my penis.

Thank you for your autism.

I’ll call your black Allgemeine SS uniform, and raise with a white SS summer dress uniform

If a random "famous" person called him fat I'd coom.

THE COURT CONFIRMS THAT PATRICK WAS TOO FAT TO HANDCUFF!

 

[Topaz Eyes]

the specter of a dying medically fragile grotesque creature-child looming over them constantly

 

[Peepeepoopoo Witch]

I can tell you unequivocally that none of my ghosts and astral children are racist.

 

[Day of the Cope]

Thanks cancer!

 

[derpi]

What a fucking wretch... Jesus. View attachment 6583841
Even after getting caught, he's still using AI to fulfill his sick impulses. Yet they'll continue to insist it's not connected to pedophilia. I've said it a bunch of times at this point, but we really need to bring back hanging.

“Big bird’s aching cloaca” from here.

 

[CaddestSlown]

"ＢＬＡＣＫ ＬＩＶＥＳ ＭＡＴＴＥＲ！ ＢＩＸ ＮＯＯＤ！"
"Kids! Get away from the windows! They're throwing poo! Please God, save us!"

 

[PhoBingas]

Come on, 96,566 is not enough woman-hate threads you party pooper

 

[Tablet County]

Holy hell, people can't even shit on a tranny game in peace

It's true narrative freedom where you can be the gayest trans antifa soldier or macrodosing on Hitler particles for the Absolute/Baal.

 

[CEO of Gay]

They are snakes, and I deal with snakes the same way my mum does; Scream in absolute fear while hitting it with the garden hose.

 

[cherrysour]

They could be the “before” photos for a depression awareness campaign.

I’ve never read someone so good at saying nothing at all.

Periods are a bitch on amphetamines.

 

[Syzyg]

Every day the portal to hell gets wider and people seem insistent on prying on it with comically large crowbars

 

[Azdy]

Check at about 3:30 to 5:00 in the video from your screenshot and Mike talks about how he likes to masturbate to the Sesame Street theme song as part of his diaper wearing ritual. This is beyond bad. It's extremely disturbing.

 

[Dead Gay Muppet Gangbang]

This isn't a meme edit, he is that fat.

 

[Tablet County]

"Nit because I'm tough, but because things make you mad yhar shouldn't." - Nick Rekieta

Imagine if each of your testicles were stretched out, then encased in a sphere of armor.

I still love the image of him looking like fat Chinese DarkSydePhil munching on a carrot.