Life after prison - What happens if Chris is One Day released from prison

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Angry Canadian said:
Chris is going to kill himself within the first month of his incarceration. His delusions are going to amplify by orders of magnitude no one can even comprehend. He's going to sit there, staring at the white walls of his pod/dorm and he's going to go absolutely batshit. He's going to fixate on being deprived of his legos, and he's going to start believing that the only way to play with his toys again is to cross over into C-197

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Perspective: You are Chris.
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That’s all good and well but it takes considerable effort, planning and foresight to figure out a way to kill yourself in police custody. Unless Chris has the guts to gnaw through his own wrists he wIll be very much alive and captive for the foreseeable future.
 
People need to realize the prison and homeless systems already handhold incarcerated defectives to apply for SSI and any other benefits they are eligible for when they are close to completing their sentence in an attempt to keep them off the streets and causing trouble for others. He'll get his tugboat back and likely foodstamps as well so he can sustain himself on state funded instant frozen dinners. He'll likely have a counselor apply him for section 8 and we'll see the ghettochu saga begin.
 
Pointless Sperg said:
Chris is too cowardly to kill himself. Even if he managed to convince himself that 41%ing would send him to CWCville, I question if he'd be able to successfully kill himself unless given a tool like a gun that he could not fuck up with.
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He’d shoot half his face off and still live. People do manage to fuck up gun suicides.
 
Angry Canadian said:
Chris is going to kill himself within the first month of his incarceration. His delusions are going to amplify by orders of magnitude no one can even comprehend. He's going to sit there, staring at the white walls of his pod/dorm and he's going to go absolutely batshit. He's going to fixate on being deprived of his legos, and he's going to start believing that the only way to play with his toys again is to cross over into C-197

View attachment 2493667
Perspective: You are Chris.
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Weirdly I don't think Chris has the capacity to realize killing himself is an option. It just would not factor into his headspace. He may die stupidly but i don't think his mind as we have seen it would deliberately toss up an Hero as a potential activity.
 
ToroidalBoat said:
If Chris does go to the slammer, his DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS problem may be solved as his shitty diet may lead to that. Prison food may arguably be healthier than daily fast food. Also he may lose some weight, and they may make Chris get his rotten seaweed hair cut.

Nick Bate looks less disgusting after years in prison, so Chris may too.
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What is CWC's daily diet again?
 
ToroidalBoat said:
It was McDonald's almost every day.

Dunno what jail food consists of...
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It seems to be different from jail to jail, but if it's cooked by inmates, it's likely your off brand jello, two or three serves of root vegetables with some kind of meat and bread.

It could also be slightly more luxurious than just that, but with most prison systems it's not normally the case.

Edit: Actually upon further inspection it seems to me that you would recieve the same sort of food that you would have had in your typical school cafeteria, I suppose what makes this better (or maybe worse from his perspective) is that the school nutritional boards whilst being incredibly slow to adapt to more healthier dietary requirements, the prison system would likely follow suit as well, so his chances of scoring junk food like chips, sodas and candy for instance are slim to none.
 
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Can you imagine Chris getting into a fight over some dickhead in prison stealing his transformers and sonichu medallion?

Chris won't survive the general population in a prison unless he joins a gang or housed with 'high risk' offenders like pedophiles and rapists.
 
Pill Cosby said:
Can you imagine Chris getting into a fight over some dickhead in prison stealing his transformers and sonichu medallion?

Chris won't survive the general population in a prison unless he joins a gang or housed with 'high risk' offenders like pedophiles and rapists.
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I am not from USA , but in my country when you are locked up they will confiscate jewelry and give it back to you when they release you.

So my question for Burgerland Kiwis Is :
Did Jerkops take his shitty medallion or does he still have it with him?

'high risk' offenders like pedophiles and rapists.
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He is rapist, but he is only dangerous to those who can't resist and to himself
 
Radola Gajda said:
He is rapist, but he is only dangerous to those who can't resist and to himself
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I would bet good money that Chris interfered with his female pets. Not full on rape, but fingering them and gross shit like that probably as “practice” for when he found his sweetheart. Chris is so vagina obsessed he wouldn’t have any qualms doing something so disgusting, God knows what atrocious things Patti went through.
 
Cuntster said:
I would bet good money that Chris interfered with his female pets. Not full on rape, but fingering them and gross shit like that probably as “practice” for when he found his sweetheart. Chris is so vagina obsessed he wouldn’t have any qualms doing something so disgusting, God knows what atrocious things Patti went through.
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I wonder if to get Chris out of 14 BC, they had to bring in a priest to throw Fanta at him and yell, "The vagina of Barb compells you!"
 
Radola Gajda said:
So my question for Burgerland Kiwis Is :
Did Jerkops take his shitty medallion or does he still have it with him?
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Everything you saw Chris wearing when he was arrested is what he currently has (in jail storage). One of my theories about Chris's outbursts in court about "his stuff" wasn't the garbage at the 14 Branchland, but all the crap he left at the hotel, which is probably in a landfill now. Since he was on the run from the law, he probably packed all his magic rocks, all his jewelry, and I wouldn't be surprised if he had a bag full of his original art. A hotel cleaning lady looking at a bunch of scribbles that looks like a seven year old did it, isn't going to think twice about tossing it all.
 
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