How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

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Dean Pentel said:
Do you need a sleep study
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I had one years ago. I don’t have any apnea, I just don’t sleep well.
I’m not overweight, my BMI is around the 21-22 sort of range. I am a bit anaemic, and I’m taking iron pills but it never seems to shift it much. Just into normal range and if you’re 0.01% above the lower range they don’t look further. I have no major health issues, I don’t drink, I don’t smoke, I don’t do drugs. I’m not on any significant medication. I don’t drink coffee or energy drinks.

I feel like I could sleep forever, I’m so tired. I should probably take some more vitamin d or something
 
Stuck in bed or in a chair more and more these days it seems,not quite sure where things are going to go for me and my health problems, i fear i am going to have to leave medical care to my parents for my issues and they are not exactly in the most sound of mind either with their own health.
Having an exceedingly rare health issue with nobody to talk to about it is doing immense damage to my mental health, and even if i could talk to someone the chance of them understanding what I am going through is next to zero.
Anyone i have tried talking to about it i have had to use vague metaphors and analogies to describe what it is like.
I fear for the future, for i do not know if i even have one. I pray, but i am scared.
 
Things are going bretty gud with the new gf and while my health efforts backfired somewhat, I’m pretty much confident in my ability to keep my health in check for the next weeks.

The main thing on my mind is work. I’ve spent more than 10 years in the same place and don’t have much motivation left. I think it’s time for me to return to my family, my friends, my roots. I’ve asked again to my current company for a transfer to another factory, close enough to my mother’s place (and way closer to my gf’s, nice bonus) but I don’t feel them too keen on that idea.

I really dread quitting, abandoning the ladder I’ve climbed up, losing its associated financial security and putting myself out there on a terrible market job (what the fuck I’m even going to do ?)
 
When husband and I started dating, he had this cat who always slept on the pillow beside him and the cat fucking hated that I had taken her pillow. In the middle of the night, this cat would go full savage on the top of my head leaving scratches and bite marks.
Eventually she and I got along and she was one of the most special cats.
 
Damn man I'm shitting my pants at my good bad luck. Got 2 interviews for a company with separate locations, one an hour away and the other down the street. Good job either way but the one an hour away wanted to hire me flat out after less than tens minutes on monday while the close one held shit close to their chest today. Interview went good and the interviewer even said I look forward to working with you as I left which feels like I'm in luck but I've known others who got the job on the spot doing the in person interview like I just did. It wouldn't be so bad if there wasn't a housing dead zone between the far away location and the place I currently live, partner works here and I'd feel like a major tool dragging them across state lines. Bah I know I did good and shouldn't be worried, I had even more qualifications for the close location so if the far one wanted me for less ya know. Just got that post interview dread now.
 
mostly been sleeping today and will probably continue to do so, i’m not even like 100% angry but I need to recharge before dealing with anymore of this slop society, people are just so proud of their own ignorance
 
WhoBusTank69 said:
I got tonsilitis. Fuck.
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Had that before, it was so bad i was having trouble breathing and my blood oxygen% was low so they cut em out fast. Hopefully yours isn't as bad.
 
Slowly trying to get healthier. It looks like in theory I could bike to work but I feel like I would die if I tried that at this point in my life. I could do transit for part of the ride but taking a bike onto the train during rush hour is a dick move and a monthly pass is expensive.
 
Betonhaus said:
Slowly trying to get healthier. It looks like in theory I could bike to work but I feel like I would die if I tried that at this point in my life. I could do transit for part of the ride but taking a bike onto the train during rush hour is a dick move and a monthly pass is expensive.
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Do it, just ride.
Give yourself plenty of time. Slowly ramp up getting faster and more days per week. If you really can't yet then do smaller rides in the evenings or weekends to get your stamina up.

This advice given to you from someone who now works from home, but did ride 4 days/week and would deliberately make the trip longer for more exercise as I could make it in 15 minutes if I needed to riding flat out. Which was only a couple minutes slower than driving.
 
I know this is something everyone deals with or is gonna have to deal with, maybe I've been mentally putting it aside for a while, but god at least in the here and now I at least have a plan for grieving and taking my time grieving for when my cat dies, but god it's awful just slowly watching her get worse yet still trying to tough it out. Her leg's getting weaker, but she's still trying to play with me like a kitten at heart and I can tell the confusion in her whenever she ends up hurting out of nowhere and then just runs someplace safe as if she can get away from it. I guess I'm mainly just hoping to God she doesn't think I'm the one hurting her.
 
On paper, good. Supposedly I can retire at any time, much earlier than normal.

Mentally I'm a wreck. If I did retire I'd have no life. I don't have many friends around here, never married or had kids (GF didn't want them), and I'm feeling increasingly isolated. This is one of the few places I can be something close to myself, because society is just plain whacked right now. My health isn't the best and unfortunately medications I'm on make a lot of common antidepressants not work, so I'm kind of fucked on that front.

Part me wishes I could be the kind of person who could really escape into fantasy through books or movies, or that being online was good enough. It's not.

Everything is fucked.
 
A ginger rascal stole my heart then crossed the rainbow bridge
You ask me if I'm devastated and I'll tell you, "Just a smidge"

That furry little bandit made off like quite the king
Wrapped around his little finger I'd have done most anything

The single thing I could not do was stop the hands of time
He is gone, and I am here, a sad and grief filled lime

-----

I lost my little guy to old age. Fuck it hurts. He was a good boy and I miss him so fucking much.
 
Gap Hag said:
Had that before, it was so bad i was having trouble breathing and my blood oxygen% was low so they cut em out fast. Hopefully yours isn't as bad.
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Not nearly, it's very minor but the 0-100 coughing and runny nose is inconvenient as hell during the day.
 
I had a dream last night that some guy was going to beat my friend's dog cause he didn't like the fact that she was standing there. I kicked him so hard in the back he became paralyzed and then he started a Gofundme to heal up, proudly disclaiming that he became paralyzed cause some "liberal" beat him up for trying to hit a "shitbull". I remember the description called on Kiwifarms, like the Gofundme description started with "Hello, my fellow farmers. Some woke liberal paralyzed me for trying to pulverize their shitbull. Don't be a dead-eyed degenerate and donate.". Null was the top donor, then that's when I woke up. I haven't had a hilariously absurd dream like that in a while.
long waters said:
I feel ya on this. As cringe as it may be considering I'm a middle aged moid, sometimes I do have shounen anime and stuff like Berserk or Vagabond on my mind when I work out.
Media can influence you for sure, so it's up to you to filter what you allow to influence you and try to be influenced by things that have good values. As lame and cringe as shounen anime may be in many ways, I think the general idea of "try hard and never give up" is a good message to spread and I think sometimes people need to be reminded of this at all ages.
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Growing up with MLP taught me a lot of basic empathy and I honestly think I would've probably been a worse person without it. And as psychotic as Movie Bob became, he's right that Mario sorta instilled this idea that even the common worker can save the world. And don't even get me started on how inspiring Sonic is.
 
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