How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

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stick said:
The first oral surgeon I saw wanted to do one or two at a time, but insisted on the IV sedation.
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I’m really afraid of IVs too and have simply had to deal with them with the various lovely chronic illnesses NEVER got used to them.

I mean like full panic, about to shit pants start crying stupid baby mode about IVs. And I’ve had hundreds of those stupid things

But for some fucking reason, and I have no idea why, the IV sedation I had for my impacted wisdom teeth was literally nothing. I was dreading it and putting it off for a while too, and when it finally happened it was like “oh that doesn’t even hurt” then before I know I was awake and already recovering

I think because I told them I was really nervous somehow they made it kick in faster than usual. Out like a light, woke up with a numb mouth

I don’t know if that means anything of comfort but wanted to share
 
Unnecessary Surgery Land said:
I’m really afraid of IVs too and have simply had to deal with them with the various lovely chronic illnesses NEVER got used to them.

I mean like full panic, about to shit pants start crying stupid baby mode about IVs. And I’ve had hundreds of those stupid things

But for some fucking reason, and I have no idea why, the IV sedation I had for my impacted wisdom teeth was literally nothing. I was dreading it and putting it off for a while too, and when it finally happened it was like “oh that doesn’t even hurt” then before I know I was awake and already recovering

I think because I told them I was really nervous somehow they made it kick in faster than usual. Out like a light, woke up with a numb mouth

I don’t know if that means anything of comfort but wanted to share
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Thank you, that does help, actually. Good to hear it straight from a fellow pants-shitting IV baby.
 
Otterly said:
I feel flat. pessimistic, very little hope for the future
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Not to religisperg, but this quote helps me when I'm feeling a bit down about the outside world.
 
Otterly said:
Do Americans routinely have their wisdom teeth removed even if they’re not causing problems?
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Yes and it's weird and dumb. I kept all my wisdom teeth, they're completely fine, I've got the rest of my teeth, too, and I plan to go to the grave with all my teeth intact, because fuck you, dentistry, you gay niggers aren't going to take my teeth away.
 
Ehh, old friend that became someone i have no shred of respect for is trying to reach out. His girlfriend is in my DMs trying to get friendly with me. I'm sure she has ulterior motives.

Tired of all this shit, not the drama above. But the day by day annoyances. Used to think growing up was an ascension into more worthwhile, responsible thinking, but 30 years into this shit it feels like the average adult is still the same immature teenager but with years of excuses and pride to justify their shitty childish behavior.

I am very tired.
 
Rocket-fueled Wheelchair said:
I used to have these when my blood pressure was high. Like a whoosh-whoosh feeling in my head whenever I moved my head too quickly. Not sure if this is what you’re experiencing but it doesn’t hurt to get your pressure measured if it’s been a while.

Thread tax: my mood is going down again. I saw a dead adolescent seagull laying on the sidewalk and it ruined my day. I have a Lindt Creme Brûlée chocolate bar from Christmas I’m trying to get through and I’m having my first diet soda of the week.
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That sounds like it could be pulsatile tinnitus, it's a real fucking bitch.
 
Feeling depressed as hell. Hoping that it'll pass soon and I get an energy boost to act.
Paranoia Machine said:
Ehh, old friend that became someone i have no shred of respect for is trying to reach out. His girlfriend is in my DMs trying to get friendly with me. I'm sure she has ulterior motives.

Tired of all this shit, not the drama above. But the day by day annoyances. Used to think growing up was an ascension into more worthwhile, responsible thinking, but 30 years into this shit it feels like the average adult is still the same immature teenager but with years of excuses and pride to justify their shitty childish behavior.

I am very tired.
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Yes, high school never ends.
 
stick said:
When I work up the nerve to set up an appointment with the new oral surgeon I'm going to ask them about it. I've never had it before, do you think that would be sufficient to chill me out if the next guy also determines that IV sedation is the only way? It's a phobia and a sensory thing for me.
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On what basis did that surgeon determine that a nerve was too close so you need iv sedation? I had 3 out just a year or two ago (one was erupted, two impacted and not erupted & required cutting into the gums) and did it with a local anesthetic. Took like 30 seconds (ok maybe 60, idr, but I do recall it was a total, surprisingly, nothing).

Eta: that said, I think I've lost a filling. Fucking hell.
 
So I've been at my job since October. My team has been understaffed the whole time and has had some turnover issues as of late. As it stands my team is 4 people: myself, the guy hired a month after me, an Indian woman, and our manager who is also an Indian woman. See the problem already? Needless to say having 50% of my team, including the manager, being Indian women has been this job absolute hell. I wasn't trained or onboarded at all and they act offended whenever I ask something.

My manager in particular shows zero appreciation for anything I have ever done and takes any opportunity she can to berate and belittle me. After months of weekly 1-on-1 progress meetings, on Friday my manager told me that I'm basically getting PIP'd next week, which is basically a long, formal offramp to fire me. I won't miss this job or the people, but I still don't want to lose my job, especially in this fucked up job market.

But I do have an ally in the form of a (white man) director guy, and I'm talking to him next week about an open internal position that he is the hiring manager of. He sent me and the newer hire some learning materials to look over (which my manager took offense to me studying) and I mentioned we had never done anything like lunch and learns, to which he basically says "that's because you need to have a good manager to do lunch and learns."

Tl;dr never work for a Pajeeta total jeet death NOW
 
I'm angry at a lot of people and a lot of authority figures that allowed me to grow up being treated like fish chum. When do you just stop caring? It's been years.
AMHOLIO said:
I ATE KOREAN FOOD AND MY COLON IS PAYING THE TAX
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You're a regular in the Wolfertinger thread... I'm going to hold back from making a scat joke.
 
Getmeout said:
I'm angry at a lot of people and a lot of authority figures that allowed me to grow up being treated like fish chum. When do you just stop caring? It's been years.

You're a regular in the Wolfertinger thread... I'm going to hold back from making a scat joke.
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That anger is useless unless turned toward productive means. It's one way to show that in the end, you had the last laugh. They'll continue being worthless while you yourself are not.
 
Glaust said:
That anger is useless unless turned toward productive means. It's one way to show that in the end, you had the last laugh. They'll continue being worthless while you yourself are not.
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It'd be easier if it wasn't still affecting me. I still have to be near my mom, and she hasn't changed a day. She just stopped getting physical cause she knows she won't win in a fight with a 20 yr old who's significantly taller than her. She still talks to me the same though, and it's angering cause it's like, have you not learned a single lesson.
It's like everytime I try to move on, she reminds me.
 
Getmeout said:
It'd be easier if it wasn't still affecting me. I still have to be near my mom, and she hasn't changed a day. She just stopped getting physical cause she knows she won't win in a fight with a 20 yr old who's significantly taller than her. She still talks to me the same though, and it's angering cause it's like, have you not learned a single lesson.
It's like everytime I try to move on, she reminds me.
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Then she is a lost cause, sorry. Focus on yourself, as much as you can with it still affecting you. You're never going to get her approval: what about YOUR own approval? Once you have this, everything else builds on.
 
Getmeout said:
I'm angry at a lot of people and a lot of authority figures that allowed me to grow up being treated like fish chum.
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The world will not be kind to anyone. The world is hard, uncaring, and harsh. Don’t seek approval from anyone else or you’ll be disappointed.
AnOminous said:
I've seen the future, sister. It is murder.
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Love’s the only engine of survival
 
Otterly said:
Love’s the only engine of survival
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An aspect of love is fighting and killing to defend what you love, just sayin'. That feral pack of rapists roaming around doesn't really have a love language and don't respond to it.
 
Nothing is wrong. I spent my Saturday with my folks, as we usually do, and came home exhausted because anything outside of my own four walls taxes me greatly (to my unending annoyance.) I wound up going to bed at 10PM, insanely early by my standards, and I slept through until 4AM, took a sleep aide and went back to sleep.
I told myself yesterday that I wanted to spend my Sunday being proactive with my chores, to get a head start on the coming week. Did I? Not really.

If nothing is wrong, and I slept well all night, why do I feel like something is wrong. I have a knot of anxiety in my stomach and a voice of un-reason in the back of my head. The very thought of checking my spam email is causing me great anxiety for zero fucking reason. It's not the action itself, but rather gaining momentum enough to commit to the action that's causing my system to go into overdrive.
I wanna cry. Nothing is wrong. Nothing. stupidstupidstupid
 
PetiteFeet said:
The very thought of checking my spam email is causing me great anxiety for zero fucking reason. It's not the action itself, but rather gaining momentum enough to commit to the action that's causing my system to go into overdrive.
I wanna cry. Nothing is wrong. Nothing.
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Obsessive compulsive thinking/rumination often comes with anxiety. Your brain is likely being afraid because it's trained to be in high alert state. Reassure your brain that we are in relax mode, calm down. It won't succeed fully today or tomorrow, but practicing can get it back down.
 
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