How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

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Thank you, and agreed but since I'm not in danger, It's all a waiting game where I am making my plans for a smooth transition. i appreciate you fuckers telling me that I am worth better, I have never believed it until recently :P
Im shit at quoting posts and I'm drinking tonight so fuck it to high hell.
As another site often says, stack your coins. I'm going to add start collecting copies or images of every single account, positive or negative; see what you do and don't have access to and get a plan for access; collect passwords; download statements; find out the cost of things for any life on your own; inventory everything; move personally important or valuable things to a safe place; talk to a lawyer; talk to a therapist; find a woman's divorce group, and create a plan and store it and everything related to the above offsite. And if possible make sure someone - anyone - knows what's going on. Not your mom or sister, though.

Whatever you ultimately decide, do these things at least as a hedge/ protection. I've learned the hard way myself and have helped/ advised a lot of women over the years. If nothing else, making sure you know exactly what is what is empowering. It may feel OTT or overwhelming, but it is worth it. Worst case, you do nothing with it...but you know you can if needed.
 
Im shit at quoting posts and I'm drinking tonight so fuck it to high hell.
im not trying to step on any toes, but i noticed that a lot of your posts mention drinking/getting high. this could be a definite strain in your marriage as well. not only is it expensive, but it can keep one from taking care of responsibilities, and i highly suggest that you limit it to special occasions.
also, its good that you arent in physical danger, but he is abusing you financially, and in the long run, this can be pretty harmful as well.

all that aside, i wouldnt let him get away with buying you gifts with your own money, anymore, and i would tell him that hes going out tomorrow and finding a job, and no more video games until he mans up and starts providing for the family.
i hope things get better for you, you deserve way WAY better than this, and he sounds like a massive loser. :heart-full:
 
Can’t say I like Winston Churchill much but the following advice is valid: when you’re going through hell, keep going.
That's a good quote, I'll have to remember that!
I randomly re-add people on Steam from years ago, shoot the shit, see a spark of chance to re-socialize, then, no fucking matter how much of a lifeless neet they are, it falls through.
I've tried talking to old friends on Steam on a few occasions, but it always seems to fizzle out. In part it may be me that's bad at talking, or I guess maybe they don't care that much. As they say, it takes two to tango.
Maybe slight PL, but I'm old enough and have lived in the same town for long enough that I'll run into someone I've met at a neighbor's party or the gym or something pretty often. When I don't remember who they are I feel embarrassed. Then I begin to wonder if they think I'm snubbing them, and feel more embarrassed. Your situation is really NBD.
I have had a similar issue with work acquaintances. I think the way my memory works, when I meet someone new in a work context I remember them only for the day or two that we interact, and then forget all about them. But then when I run into that person again at some conference or expo or some other event, and they remember me but I don't remember them, it's definitely awkward.
 
It's all a waiting game where I am making my plans for a smooth transition.
Documents in a safe place. Anything it’d hurt you to lose quietly placed at a friend’s or in storage. Bank account set up to quietly and slowly build up some buffer cash.
Agree with others saying cut down on any drinking or getting high. I know it’s a release but it leaves you vulnerable. Get all your ducks in a row and I know you say he’s not physically violent but be prepared for the possibility at the point you leave.
 
I hate this shithole town so much. There's not much to do, no one can do anything right the first time, and every business is seemingly trying to scam its customers.
 
Got a new part-time worker. Two days later:

Ladies and gentlemen, we're one man down.
1767958474322.png

This is never going to end.
 
Work is real strange rn, boss just had some crazy medical attack and is gonna be on rest mode for like 6 months. Everyone else is getting sick af but I already survived the flu wave back in December. Its nice to have the time to stand out at work but I've been noticing my co workers giving up on tasks half way through and vanishing to do easy work. Makes me look good but I don't really want to stand out too hard with this over time ridden job. On the other hand home life is strange af too with my partner going through personal shit thats really digging at his self confidence. I wish I could do more for him and not have my mind always try to make it personal but its just one of those times I'm gonna have to wait out. He has his goals in place and just needs to reach them, which 100% he can but I know how the job market is right now. He doesn't feel like a provider and has always wanted to be one for me and of course for himself but this time his dad really gave him one of those string cut moments that made him feel like a loser. He doesn't feel worthy of a lot of things right now, from hobbies to sex, which makes it hard to not feel personally bothered. I know he can achieve what he wants and trust him to do so, he just doesn't trust himself.
 
Feeling slightly less miserable. I got some good news in my mail, though: the leasing company got my mail and will warn the schizo one final time.

If she does more shit, the case will be put before what we here call the "Rent Board" which is meant to handle disputes between tenants and landlords legally.

Hurray.

Come, ya schizo. Knock on my windows some more so we can kick you out!
 
Feeling slightly less miserable. I got some good news in my mail, though: the leasing company got my mail and will warn the schizo one final time.

If she does more shit, the case will be put before what we here call the "Rent Board" which is meant to handle disputes between tenants and landlords legally.

Hurray.

Come, ya schizo. Knock on my windows some more so we can kick you out!
Holy shit, i really hope this works out for you and the crazy bitch will be gone soon! I mentioned how i had similar problems with some neighbours once (who are long gone by now) and my landlords gave zero fucks and did nothing despite me and a lot of my other, more normal neighbours pretty much complaining on the daily. Until those neighbours eventually stopped paying rent, then shit moved very fast all of a sudden. I still remember how happy i was seeing these people standing in front of the house with all their shit packed up. Fucking subhumans, how hard is it to be a good neighbour?

Tt: Took a new pain medication i got prescribed yesterday. Was out and about for too long and my back was hurting more than usual, popped one of the pills and went to sleep for 14 hours straight. Back still hurts a bit but it is manageable, gonna exercise for a bit now. I'm trying to quit alcohol completely again but i am already seeing myself buying yet another bottle of gin tonight, i am just so fucking bored all day because i can't do much due to my messed-up back and being drunk alleviates at least some of the boredom. Still, i am reaching levels of drinking again that are, while not really concerning, too high for my liking.
Talked to my mother earlier today, her birthday is coming up, asked her if she's doing anything. Old girl seemed kinda depressed lately (heck, the last two years if i am honest) so i wasn't surprised when she told me she's doing fuck all for her birthday. Told her me and GF will come over no matter what she says so she better have something prepared for us. Turning the tables on that that tough love shit i had to live through as a kid around big time :story:
 
Today was supposed to be brief and simple. I made a single 'quirky' comment to nobody in particular and I got a desk-slamming semi-outrage response that was immediately killed by ~facts and logic~, yet not before trying to drag me for said comment for 5 mins. And even then the retard didn't back down. Any other person would've just said "oh lol lmao maybe it's-". God this job is grating on me. I tried being quiet and just working but clearly I failed. From now on I will literally just, not say a thing cause clearly I can say nothing right to this hag.
When I don't remember who they are I feel embarrassed. Then I begin to wonder if they think I'm snubbing them, and feel more embarrassed. Your situation is really NBD.
Any normal person wouldn't give two shits if you stared into their eyes and said "I don't know who you are". In this day and age, simply showing interest in another person, for any reason, from any standpoint, you're doing better than most.
I've tried talking to old friends on Steam on a few occasions, but it always seems to fizzle out. In part it may be me that's bad at talking, or I guess maybe they don't care that much. As they say, it takes two to tango.
It's the universal truth but sometimes it's nice to be surrounded by people who go on/offline and play games if just to imply there's a chance you might be friends at some point. Even if you won't, and they don't reply, and they're set to offline. Shit, the other day a long-time 'friend' removed me (one who stood me up every time we had a chance to play games) and it was oddly freeing. No longer having to try to converse on some level. No wonder I got hooked on removing people. Remove the 'potentially, maybe' in favor of freeing up those 25 mins of my day.
 
We have a new-ish employee that just isn't cutting it at the job, and as a result my workload has increased. That part is fine. I can adapt. The problem is that some of my other coworkers can't. I get along with all of them on a professional and personal level, including the new hire, so it genuinely pains me to hear them bitch about or to the new person. I know it's probably just me placing too much stock in work relationships when I really shouldn't, but I'm a sad sack and don't have much else. I take it very personally and feel like I need to be the one to fix it, but I can't stop other adults from bickering and I shouldn't CARE that they're bickering. It's just the vibes, man. The vibes are bad when they used to be good, and I don't like it! I'm so stressed out at work all the time now. I just want all of the people I like to like each other. :(
 
Any normal person wouldn't give two shits if you stared into their eyes and said "I don't know who you are". In this day and age, simply showing interest in another person, for any reason, from any standpoint, you're doing better than most.
Man, that sounds grim when you put it like that.
 
Still dealing with the other manager that runs to the boss every time I do something "against the rules", while when the other managers do the same thing and don't get that treatment. God forbid a white boy knows how to run a shift.
 
God forbid a white boy knows how to run a shift.
Damn, you don't look like the cute animu girl in your pfp and you are male? Fantasy destroyed.

I am nursing my third gin right now (because of course i do) and it's just 7PM, i already feel fucked up like 2AM. I need to get this shit in check. Sorry for sounding like @wry wrangler right now :story:
 
A couple of months ago my mother let me in on a secret - she wanted to purchase tickets for a theatre concert about a local band that both of my parents like.
Today is the day of the concert, so I'm dogsitting. I offered it because I feel better about their dog being in my care for the evening and night, and because it means they don't have to worry about anything except for the weather and getting my recently hip operated mother in and out of the car.
He's a now 5 year old french bulldog, and he's a menace but I love him nonetheless. He gets along with my dog, who is a senior dog and doesn't care to play with him except in very rare situations, so I have to play with him which I don't mind at all.

Two dogs in the house means I have more background noise than usual. It really helps with keeping the existential dread at bay. 10/10 would recommend, except don't get a frenchie if you are sensitive to smells. They fart a lot.
 
I am nursing my third gin right now (because of course i do) and it's just 7PM, i already feel fucked up like 2AM. I need to get this shit in check. Sorry for sounding like @wry wrangler right now :story:
Yeah, you need to get it in check or you'll end up like Forsaken Wanderer.
 
Yeah, you need to get it in check or you'll end up like Forsaken Wanderer.
I have known the touch of a woman before so there's no chance of me ever ending up like that :story: I just called him out on some inane shit he said in a thread (something about women only being into men with giant dicks, predictably retarded statement from him) just yesterday and i have yet to wait for a response by him.
 
I've finally meen medicated for my ADHD and so far its been good. Its been, a little quieter in my head and I can actually focus and remember important tasks. Plus I just bought a house which I love and ive been making good money in 2025.

Work has been easy and I've just been crusing for the most part. I make my own schedule so I choose to work hard now so I can be lazy later and still get paid about the same.

I will say I am so fucking tired of politics, actually not even just politics but honestly the sole focus everyone has on one horrible thing after the next. Its so exhausting and I'm tired of bad things, of course involving trump, being brought up in my friends group chat. It happened not to long ago and I've muted that chat for the time being because I dont wanna hear about ICE right now.

Luckily I can say for the most part thats my only real gripe right now so I'm just trying to enjoy what I have going on. I hope as many people as possible here can do the same sooner rather then later.
 
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