/horror/ general megathread - Let's talk about movies and shit.

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How did creepypastas ever become a thing? There were a few rare hits, and yes, all media has those in a flood of low-effort dross. But looking back, who ever thought this Patrick Tomlinson-tier garbage was scary?

I remember they had to make a separate site for crappypastas, parodypastas, and trollpastas.

Maybe I'm being a chronological snob? Nobody thinks the OG Frankenstein or Nosferatu is pants-shitting scary anymore, either.
 
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Among "interesting" watches there's the 2020 film "History of the Occult", in part staged as the last episode of an Argentinian TV news magazine in the 1980s, setting out to expose links between the corrupt government and a coven.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=vJdBnQeiTfI
It was a slow burn but i liked it. There was also another recent argentinian movie called Aterrados. Nothing groundbreaking but i liked some of the haunting scenes a lot.
 
Frankenstein is terrifying compared to haunted Nintendo cartridges
Here's one for ya: "Purging Mario". Everyone who writes or posts a Haunted Cartridge/Pokepasta gets hunted down and murdered by a man in a Mario costume.

OOOOOOOOO
 
WRONG, NIGGA!

1: I said "horror story" and not horror film implying feature length.

2: You forgot about motherfucking Creepshow 2!

View attachment 5459105

Turn in your horror fan badge because it's over. You're done. Time to go watch Five Nights At Freddy's with the rest of the sheep and then you can discuss your absolute poseur taste with horrorfan89.
Brunoooooooooo, you forgot about Terror in Topanga from the 1983 movie Nightmares. Everyone remembers The Bishop of Battle part of that movie, I always remember the story with the giant rat that looked to cute to be a monster.

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Brunoooooooooo, you forgot about Terror in Topanga from the 1983 movie Nightmares. Everyone remembers The Bishop of Battle part of that movie, I always remember the story with the giant rat that looked to cute to be a monster.

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Oh, Nightmares. I saw that one. I remember that one for the videogame segment with Emilio Estevez and the final segment with the giant rat in the walls of a family's home.
 
Oh, Nightmares. I saw that one. I remember that one for the videogame segment with Emilio Estevez and the final segment with the giant rat in the walls of a family's home.
Yeah I saw it as a kid and remember the giant rat being more scary then it was. They tried to make up this lore for the rat with the exterminator guy having an old German book on it.
 
I did something deeply wrong on many levels, and I'm sorry. I've seen Doctor Sleep before, and I bought the (cheap) Blu-ray in order to see the director's cut after LowRes Wünderbred declared it to be his podcast's most hated film for the 300th episode. I know.

But as I said a couple of weeks ago, I don't hate this movie! It isn't great by any stretch, but, again, it didn't offend me the way I expected it to. And this is my confession of a great sin of taste. I am sorry.
 
WRONG, NIGGA!

1: I said "horror story" and not horror film implying feature length.

2: You forgot about motherfucking Creepshow 2!

View attachment 5459105

Turn in your horror fan badge because it's over. You're done. Time to go watch Five Nights At Freddy's with the rest of the sheep and then you can discuss your absolute poseur taste with horrorfan89.
Oh so 2 instead of 1?

Also you didn't even name Roadgames. Weak. Eat my sausage nigga.
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I saw an article about a film called Men and it sounded good. More like Meh. It's got a good concept. Woman trapped in a weird English village where every guy is the same guy and they're all after her. But it's so plodding and boring. There are long stretches where nothing happens, there's no dialog and all you see is scenery of forests, an apple tree or a dead deer ect... Then finally this weird guy will appear and chase her and she literally does nothing of note. She just calls her friend or wanders around the village some more until another sameface weirdo appears to stalk her.

Then weird stuff starts happening like lights going off and people suddenly disappearing. I thought it was going to take some weird turn like Bottom Of The World where the relationship between the couple isn't what you think it is at all and something completely different is really going on. But it was just a boring marriage where the guy has a tantrum over a divorce and an heroes off the roof.

It's full of weird symbolism and was just 3 deep 5 me. Also mpreg. Instantaneous death inducing mpreg over and over again. That's the climax. It's gross and disturbing and the end makes no sense.

Midsommar is also a slog. Like a slow burn is good sometimes. But a lot of these newer weird horror movies are more like cold, clammy slogs. I like weird movies. But how much Swedish countryside scenes with zero going on do I need before something actually happens. I'm an hour in to a three hour movie and the only "horror" element I've seen is a kid with a deformed face. It's just hippies talking and some guy who won't shut up about getting tick bites. I think I'm going to take an intermission and finish tomorrow. Why do people say this movie is great? Am I missing something?
 
https://youtube.com/watch?v=-U-h7R1UZH8
How did creepypastas ever become a thing? There were a few rare hits, and yes, all media has those in a flood of low-effort dross. But looking back, who ever thought this Patrick Tomlinson-tier garbage was scary?

I remember they had to make a separate site for crappypastas, parodypastas, and trollpastas.

Maybe I'm being a chronological snob? Nobody thinks the OG Frankenstein or Nosferatu is pants-shitting scary anymore, either.
At this point, it feels like any horror story published on the internet is getting called a creepypasta.
 


Terrifier 3 teaser. Bring it on. I hope the director makes sequels for all the holidays. That way if Eli Roth's Thanksgiving shits the bed at least Art the Clown can have a try at it.
 
Alright. Finished the director's cut of Doctor Sleep (2019). I guess it was worth what I paid for it.

This is my second time seeing the movie, and even though the DC has more footage (and I'm not exactly sure what was added), it basically feels the same. Maybe better than the theatrical cut?

Blasphemous or not, if you're going to make this (good, if not perfect) script, you have to recast all the all characters, and that part feels fine. It's bold, but it's somehow respectful. They're not playing caricatures of the original actors even if they kind of look and sound like them. That's an accomplishment.

Rose the Hat and The True Knot (lmao) are kind of lame in practice, though conceptually as energy vampires they're fine. I love Rebecca Ferguson, but she was not right for this role despite how good an actor she is. The things she does are evil as hell, but she's not scary. Maybe she was directed poorly? I dunno. And we never really learned much about the other members of the group, and that sucks because we spend too much time with them if that's how Flanagan's going to play it. I'm sure that's why they focused on Snakebite Anni, to stand in for the rest of the "nameless" members. (Sidenote: Anni really should have been played by an actual teenage actress. It would have be far more effective and disturbing.)

But they're okay and not the worst part of the film, which is fairly strong in the first 3/4ths. What bothered me a lot more in this viewing was the decidedly indulgent stuff at the end. Make sure audiences know this is a "true" sequel to the Kubrick film, sure, but it should have had an even lighter touch than it did with the memberberries. Danny talking to his father at the bar is great stuff, and the Overlook "waking up," that's cool. I like the idea of using the place as a spiritual trap. But the iconic ghosts show up one too many times to deliver their signature lines, and it just goes on too long. It would have been better if the movie had used that setting even more sparingly. That would have been bold and masterful, to have that stuff and use almost none of it.

Also, the actual "Doctor Sleep" scenes are incredibly strong and emotional, and I wanted more of it. Just give me a tiny, soundless montage of Dan helping other people find their way out of this plane. And, oh yeah, somehow tie that shit into the ending, because it just disappears, thematically, after the hipster crew shows up. WTF?

And did Danny really have to die for this girl at the end? It might have worked if we saw more of their relationship with each other, maybe their pen pal messages back and forth for years in another "time passing" montage. You don't really get a sense of who they are to each other. Or maybe who they are period. (Abra is a cringe as fuck character name, also.)

Yeah, I'm bitching a lot, but I like the movie. It's just got a lot of rough edges when you step back and look at it... Maybe I'll read the book?
 
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