/horror/ general megathread - Let's talk about movies and shit.

[BiggerChungus]

At least it knew it was a shitty movie.

That's the #1 problem, it takes itself deathly seriously despite being goofy and nonsensical as shit. Halloween 1 and 2 were serious, but took themselves seriously. Characters didn't run around monologuing about morality, characters didn't act like braindead lemmings, Michael wasn't a cartoony invincible supervillain, and Laurie wasn't a one-note brooding bitch. The only character who got philosophical was Loomis, but it made sense for his character and he was a good enough actor to pull it off without looking like an awkward dumbass. The new ones are grim and srs bsns, but what happens onscreen is totally dissonant from that. Only the first one from a few years ago seemed to make at least a modest effort to not only present itself seriously, but be serious.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

That's the #1 problem, it takes itself deathly seriously despite being goofy and nonsensical as shit. Halloween 1 and 2 were serious, but took themselves seriously. Characters didn't run around monologuing about morality, characters didn't act like braindead lemmings, Michael wasn't a cartoony invincible supervillain, and Laurie wasn't a one-note brooding bitch. The only character who got philosophical was Loomis, but it made sense for his character and he was a good enough actor to pull it off without looking like an awkward dumbass. The new ones are grim and srs bsns, but what happens onscreen is totally dissonant from that. Only the first one from a few years ago seemed to make at least a modest effort to not only present itself seriously, but be serious.

Yeah 2018 was probably the only one that actually tried to fit itself into being somewhat similar in tone to the original since it actually knew to balance itself out and was aware it was a slasher.

Outside of the Michael scenes and certain others, Kills felt like a pretentious movie thinking it was giving poignant commentary about mob mentality which makes no fucking sense when the characters in-universe all know what Michael looks like from under the mask.

Then there's Ends which tries to be a pretentious "WHAT MAKES A KILLER" movie yet the killer is your standard incel who gets bullied by everyone that decided to copy his idol.

Though the pretentious tone makes sense if you consider that perhaps 2018 was originally the end but Blumhouse wanted a trilogy, combined with new writers for each film.

Like honestly Ends is probably the closest that there is to a creepypasta movie with one of those "Killer OCs"

 

[feral cat #6385]

Shut your fucking mouth.

It's the best series with over 4 entries as far as horror goes, only has two misfires (8 and X) and the formula is so easy you could make another 10 without fucking it up.

Though considering how every other series has been fucked over when rebooted, the only reason I'd accept the series being put on ice is to avoid a 40 minute flashback telling us how Jason was bullied for being non-binary and that's why he drowned and his trans mother had no choice but to avenge his death from his cis het killers.

Hard disagree on Jason X. It's cheesy but it's entertaining unlike the shitfest that is Jason Goes to Hell.

I would like to see a spinoff series where Jason kills Doctor Who. Takes the Tardis and uses it to go through time and space killing people in a variety of settings. Would be loads to fun.

Fuck off, Jason Takes Manhattan is a great movie, the only problem is that it was solved as Jason in NYC which is why people threw a shitfit, but if it had been called Jason Takes A Cruise 90% of the complaints about it would not exist.

The only "vs" movie we should mourn is Freddy vs Jason vs Ash

Now you are making me want to see Jason on The Love Boat. And maybe Jason Goes to Fantasy Island.

Agreed on the last point. Pinhead would have to show up at the end to tease the sequel. Biggest missed opportunity.

 

[I'm Not Racist Anymore]

Just saw Halloween Ends, and I have to say that I liked it as far as slashers go. It's pretty unconventional and unexpected at the least. This is coming from somebody who doesn't really care for whatever gets released for any of these horror franchises anymore. They all feel dull.

Really didn't like anything after Laurie shooting Corey. According to the leaks/older test screenings some sort of final fight was supposed to happen on the radio tower where Michael would've died. Corey would've barely survived, been taken by an ambulance, and would've killed everyone in there. Would prefer that.

 

[HodgePodgeRogerDodger]

The Exorcist probably is one of the best Horror Films ever made. Shot well, characters are good, and some of the cut dialogue is great. The horror is layered, the mothers fear for her daughter, the actual demon, and Father Karras own doubt in the face of evil.

I like Marron a ton. The cut dialogue where he tries to alleviate Karras’s fears about how the demon is using the girl as a weapon against them and plant doubt into them is good.
Exorcist 3 is pretty good, not as well put together as the first, but a good continuation.

I’d say it’s a lot like John Carpenter’s The Thing in how it balances surreal and alien horror with a more mundane horror. Powerless in the face of an unknown with Reagan in The Exorcist and an inability to turn to anyone in The Thing. No one is an idiot, they approach things in a manner like rational people.
I don’t want to sound pretentious, but they’re just well written with good effects. They’re a bit more refined then a slasher movie, to put it in a pretentious way.

 

[Ita Mori]

Just saw Halloween Ends, and I have to say that I liked it as far as slashers go.

HOW???
This film sucks as a sequel, as a trilogy climax, and as an individual film.

It makes Kills look like H2 and H2018 look like H1.

I just saw Halloween Ends. It really feels like they put two different movies and fused them together since the last act was the most watchable part of the film.

It's Child's Play 2019 all over again: someone had a script for a mediocre film but the studio execs wanted a brand to attach it to in order to sell more tickets; oh hey, look: it's Michael Myers!

Kills is at least decent slasher-porn if you ignore the stupid mental patient subplot.

Ends just has... nothing but really shitty drama. Michael's death in it is weak and shitty, especially when compared to the trap-house finale of the 2018 one and even Kills when the townsfolk corner him.

Kills at least does it's job of building Michael up as this impossible challenge for the heroes to overcome. Michael is at his most menacing by the end and it makes you wonder just how the fuck they can beat this monster killing machine...

Turns out they won't beat any killing machine; just an old geriatric hobo living the sewers and his sidekick budget Todd Howard.

"You can't defeat evil with brute force"
- Laurie Strode, 2018. Halloween Kills

-"lmao, gimme that fridge."
- Laurie Strode, 2022. Halloween Ends

 

[TV's Adam West]

Watched the new hellraiser. I liked they made it true to the source material by making it fucking agonizing to watch.
I'd go in detail and not just a shitty joke,, but the movie didn't give a fuck, so why should I.

 

[Ita Mori]

I get the vibe they intended 2018 to be a one and done,

Wrong. The original script detailed for a three and half hour movie or multiple films. There was always intended to be more than one.
2018 is better simply because there's more passion and everyone involved is enthusiastic about the project.
By film 3 everyone is tired and just wants to wrap it up, more so given Wu Flu and reshoots/rewrites.

This should've been all filmed back to back to back a la LotR.

 

[A Grey Cat]

Glad to see you made it back from the Pet Sematary. Watch out for trucks next time.

Well This is just for spooktober.

Watched the new hellraiser. I liked they made it true to the source material by making it fucking agonizing to watch.
I'd go in detail and not just a shitty joke,, but the movie didn't give a fuck, so why should I.

Can you believe Doug Bradley actually gave the new pinhead praise in a tweet? I wanna give the old man some leeway and say its a mix of senility in his old age, with a hint of desperation to stay relevant. (and from being under heavy latex for almost 20 years) but in this day and age how can you tell?

Haven't seen Halloween ends but from what I've read here unlike the last two it doesn't have much to offer. It's seems to only be worth watching along with the other two of the blumhouse films and only for completionist reasons. Like only if you plan on marathoning every film back to back for whatever reason. just so you can have the better or least mehdiocre ones to offer as a chaser.

My god this genre really has fallen from grace hasn't it?

I can't quote @TV's Adam West directly but I agree. Kill count does have some use as a time killer and I've found out about a few good films from the show but James himself?....He seems like a decent guy; got a wife, a studio, plenty of friends, met a lot of interesting people, and at least he's happy doing what he loves. But ffs James stop being such a soylent simp.

 

[Oats12345]

Well This is just for spooktober.


Can you believe Doug Bradley actually gave the new pinhead praise in a tweet? I wanna give the old man some leeway and say its a mix of senility in his old age, with a hint of desperation to stay relevant. (and from being under heavy latex for almost 20 years) but in this day and age how can you tell?

Haven't seen Halloween ends but from what I've read here unlike the last two it doesn't have much to offer. It's seems to only be worth watching along with the other two of the blumhouse films and only for completionist reasons. Like only if you plan on marathoning every film back to back for whatever reason. just so you can have the better or least mehdiocre ones to offer as a chaser.

My god this genre really has fallen from grace hasn't it?

I can't quote @TV's Adam West directly but I agree. Kill count does have some use as a time killer and I've found out about a few good films from the show but James himself?....He seems like a decent guy; got a wife, a studio, plenty of friends, met a lot of interesting people, and at least he's happy doing what he loves. But ffs James stop being such a soylent simp.

I think your being harsh on Doug Bradly. I hear that despite the new Pinhead being troon. The actor doesn't too bad of a job.

 

[FMW13]

I think your being harsh on Doug Bradly. I hear that despite the new Pinhead being troon. The actor doesn't too bad of a job.

Aren't the cenobites basically troons though?

 

[Oats12345]

Aren't the cenobites basically troons though?

In the orginal book from what I hear....

Yes.

 

[FMW13]

Can you believe Doug Bradley actually gave the new pinhead praise in a tweet? I wanna give the old man some leeway and say its a mix of senility in his old age, with a hint of desperation to stay relevant. (and from being under heavy latex for almost 20 years) but in this day and age how can you tell?

Hate to break it to you but in the book the Cenobites are Troons. Read the book myself years ago always found it kinda weird. Also at this point I think Doug Bradley doesn't care anymore he just seems to be glad that someone else is playing Pinhead better than the last two guys.

 

[A Grey Cat]

Hate to break it to you but in the book the Cenobites are Troons. Read the book myself years ago always found it kinda weird. Also at this point I think Doug Bradley doesn't care anymore he just seems to be glad that someone else is playing Pinhead better than the last two guys.

eh fair points all around maybe that was a bit too hard. If Bradley's happy enjoying his autumn years good for him.

 

[Doctor of Autism]

HOW???
This film sucks as a sequel, as a trilogy climax, and as an individual film.

It makes Kills look like H2 and H2018 look like H1.


It's Child's Play 2019 all over again: someone had a script for a mediocre film but the studio execs wanted a brand to attach it to in order to sell more tickets; oh hey, look: it's Michael Myers!



Kills at least does it's job of building Michael up as this impossible challenge for the heroes to overcome. Michael is at his most menacing by the end and it makes you wonder just how the fuck they can beat this monster killing machine...

Turns out they won't beat any killing machine; just an old geriatric hobo living the sewers and his sidekick budget Todd Howard.

"You can't defeat evil with brute force"
- Laurie Strode, 2018. Halloween Kills

-"lmao, gimme that fridge."
- Laurie Strode, 2022. Halloween Ends

God Ends was so stupid in how they handled the surviving strodes

Laurie went from an extreme survivalist but now is making pies and shit despite the fact Michael has killed even more people including her daughter and is on the loose.

Then there’s the grand daughter who should learn to be more skeptical yet apparently she dated an ugly bastard offscreen who was a dick and trusts Incel man and think he’s a good boy even after he flat out says he killed someone to her.

Seriously I get COVID was a thing but I don’t get why they couldn’t have made Ends take place on the same night like originally intended

 

[XYZpdq Jr.]

Finally saw Dracula 3000. Pretty impressive pile of shit.
Audio mix was poorly enough done that it made it tough to hear the bad dialog, which makes it a bit less easy to recommend as a crap movie, but it still brought a lot to the shit table

 

[White Devil]

Finally saw Dracula 3000. Pretty impressive pile of shit.
Audio mix was poorly enough done that it made it tough to hear the bad dialog, which makes it a bit less easy to recommend as a crap movie, but it still brought a lot to the shit table

So, I've always been a fan of Dark Prince : The True Story of Dracula even though it's not really a horror movie. It's pretty standard made for TV medieval fare but I've always enjoyed how cheesy it could be, I fucking LOVED RoboCop has an orthodox priest in that horrible wig and fake beard. The acting was cheesy and great and the ending, even though this is supposed to be a real historical piece and not supernatural, heavily implies that after Vlad Dracula is killed, he does rise from his grave to give credence to the myth.

That being said, why is it most Dracula movies are on the bad end of the spectrum?

 

[White Devil]

Double post but lol this fucking retard :

John continues to not get it.

 

[Ita Mori]

Sophisticated? Michael Myers is your source for sophistication and high art?
What's even sophisticated about it? Rob Zombie's Halloween did the same thing with Myers's backstory about a broken youth being the object of bullying and ridicule who snaps on those who erred him and becomes a serial killer.
"How much abuse can a person take before they snap?" Wow, big deep thunk here. Truly the philosopher theories of our time.

iT wAsNt A tYpIcAl SlAsHer; It ToOk RiSkS
Yeah so did H: Resurrection, and it sucked a fat one.

Flint's a redditor to the end; seeking sophistication and deep meaning in children's marketing and mainstream popcorn flicks.

Lmao Stephen King, the autist who considers Kubrick's The Shining (a much superior movie in every way that handles nuance and subtlety in manners Ends could only masturbate about) a terrible film... "basic taste" indeed.

 

[BiggerChungus]

Kills at least does it's job of building Michael up as this impossible challenge for the heroes to overcome. Michael is at his most menacing by the end and it makes you wonder just how the fuck they can beat this monster killing machine...

While he's definitely got plot armor out the ass in Kills, most of his unbeatable-ness comes more from how painfully retarded and incompetent every single character in it is. Victims just slowly walk up to him single file to get killed, cops and people with guns don't shoot him and again just walk straight towards him to die, the government's response to him consists of like three deputies and an old guy, and everyone is more concerned about making sledgehammer-subtle mob speeches than actually doing anything. Horror movie characters are generally stupid, but Kills has some of the stupidest I've ever seen.

The fact that as soon as someone (Laurie) actually acts smart and tries to kill him, and all it takes is a slit throat and he's done, makes me think Kills was meant to have been the ending movie but because of a forced sequel they had to redo it to make sure Michael survived.