/horror/ general megathread - Let's talk about movies and shit.

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Yesterday's movie was Byzantium and... it fucking sucks. Didn't even mean that as a pun, I don't get why so many people raved about it so much or said it was one of the best vampire movies of the last decade or so. The only redeeming value of this movie are Gemma Arterton's tits, and that's about it. Literally the only reason you're supposed to care about the two vampires is because they are good looking, if they were 300 pounds shaniqua no one would have watched it, or would have rooted for them to get killed. It's fucking emo to the point it's cringe, the only positive to all the flashbacks from 200 years prior is all the corsets and that's about it. What a waste of time. 1/5

Hoping V/H/S/94 is gonna make up for it, I fucking loved part 1 & 2 (and did not even remember there was a third part until someone mentioned it yesterday)
 
When we were kids this was scarier than most horror movies.

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trent said:
I'm watching the Phantasm movies at the moment because i'd never seen them before.

Just finished the third one and they are truly awful so far.
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The Phantasm movies are fascinating, like a celluloid fever dream. Each other builds on the previous ones, like waking up when you're still asleep. A dream within a dream. Nested nightmares the are illogical and unreal, but never the less so terrifying.

That is the horror of Phantasm, the sense of incomprehensible evil from beyond, banal but at the same time hopelessly esoteric.
 

Here Comes Hell, a campy microbudget flick that goes all Evil Dead-ish in a British manor house setting out of a 1930s Old Dark House movie after a séance goes wrong. One's tolerance for not-so-good cheesy acting and cheap practical/digital FX will decide if you can’t stand this or have a decent time. Myself, I admired the attempt even though I felt not all of the elements worked.
 
Watched Antrum : The Deadliest Film Ever Made last night and I have to say it was a massive disappointment. The music and concept were cool, the two actors weren't terrible, but the execution and overall plot were just bad. The movie is fucking boring and it looks like it was shot as a high school film project.
 
BrunoMattei said:
Is Sam Raimi even really a horror director? Aside from the Evil Dead trilogy all that's left is Drag Me To Hell. You could reaaaallllly stretch it with Dark Man which has some horror elements. It's like saying John Landis is a horror director even though he only directed 2 movies (and 2 episodes of Masters of Horror but I digress).
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Sam Raimi mainly gets lumped in with the horror directors because the one big horror contribution he made was the friggin' Evil Dead trilogy.

horrorfan89 said:
I feel the same way about Tim Burton, in his entire Career from 1985 to today only these films could be considered straight up horror; Beetlejuice, Edward Scissorhands, Sleepy Hollow, Corpse Bride, Sweeny Todd, and Dark Shadows. and some of those you kinda gotta stretch to consider horror. Edward Scissorhands is more a drama and only becomes more akin to horror in the last act, Sweeny Todd's a musical, and Corpse Bride's animated and more on the dark comedy side.
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At least with Tim Burton, he's got the whole weird goth thing going for him and early horror overlapped with the gothic genre both in film and literature.

MoffAlbert said:
The only things I've watched this October so far that count as horror movies are Ringu and Kwaidan. I'm hoping to watch the Hammer Dracula movies with my wife. Maybe the 90's Francis Ford Copolla Dracula, too. I've never seen it and heard mixed opinions on whether it's good or not.
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Coppola's film is my favorite adaptation of Dracula and is one of my favorite vampire movies of all time alongside Martin and The Lost Boys.

horrorfan89 said:
tonight's 31 for 31 entry is Dracula (1931) feel kinda bad for the universal monsters, they've hit a major rough patch recently. The attempt to bring them all back and together in the "Dark Universe" with 2017's the mummy was a total flop, then the follow up was the 2020 version of the invisible man.
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Honestly, I think something like the Universal Monsters would be the kind of thing best brought back by an independent filmmaker and take advantage of the fact most of the monsters are either from the public domain originally or can be easily genericized. Monster Squad did that fairly well.

Basically, someone needs to save up the money and do their own low-budget Dark Universe equivalent. Hell, you can even bring in other public domain stuff like Night of the Living Dead or The King In Yellow in there as well.

I'm honestly surprised The Asylum didn't try that angle given their love of mockbusters and exploiting the public domain for all it's worth.
 
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MoffAlbert said:
The only things I've watched this October so far that count as horror movies are Ringu and Kwaidan. I'm hoping to watch the Hammer Dracula movies with my wife. Maybe the 90's Francis Ford Copolla Dracula, too. I've never seen it and heard mixed opinions on whether it's good or not.
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Christopher lee is up there with the man himself bello Lugosi in terms of definitive draculas, as for the coppola version....eh it's very love it or hate it. The casting is often considered the biggest "WTF moment" of it. 90's post Bill and ted but pre matrix Keanu reeves as a brirish Johnathan Harker....yeah there's a reason people used to say they could almost see him holding back the urge to say "dude," or "brah" at the end of each line.
 
Internet War Criminal said:
Yesterday was v/h/s/94

fucking waste of time, they had to go and make it political, fuck that shit 0/5 complete waste of time.
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Wait, what? I don't see anything political about it, unless you mean the last segment. I only saw the characters as your normal fictional racists, not real-life racists.
  • Storm Drain: Pretty good and solid. The low budget hurts the monster design, but its creative enough to ignore that. Surprisingly unexpected funny ending.
  • Funeral: VERY slow to get going, really average. Run-of-mill zombie flick. But me skipping through parts where nothing was happening made it look like the zombie wanted to protect her from the tornado. No idea if that was what happening or I missed something during the skips, but I prefer seeing it that way- makes it interesting and sweet.
  • The Subject: Doesn't fit the movie in general, but pretty good in itself. Weaker than the creator's previous work Safe Haven.
  • Terror: A really fun romp when it gets going, same points as The Subject. Interesting vampire blood stuff and design, and interesting how he blows himself up as payback for the torture. Shame we don't see him much.
  • Warparound: Worse than Viral. Absolute shit. I find myself skipping them.

The low budget can make the CGI effects really noticeable and the segments are a mixed bag par the norm as the series, but its still an enjoyable popcorn flick. If I have to say the worst one of 94, definitely the Funeral one.
 
watching John Carpenter's Christine and one thing i noticed about it is, well it's actually pretty tame by most horror movies of the 80s. I've heard the only reason the movie even got an R rating, was because Carpenter added in a bunch of characters randomly dropping F bombs or crude humor and a few reshot scenes to add more blood in, and yeah if you edit out some dialogue and tone down the deaths Christine could almost pass for PG (there was no PG-13 rating till 1984)
 
Redwood Massacre Annihilation had the potential to be a great movie, but the ending was fucking terrible. It ruined the stakes of the story, any mystery about the killer in the dumbest way possible, and ruined the lore of the killer.
 
I'll get back to V/H/S/94 later but first I wanted to discuss yesterday's movie, Headless (2015).

Uh. Yeah, I'm not sure I know what to say. I don't remember the last time I saw a movie that was so... mean-spirited. I mean, from the movie description alone, I guess I shouldn't have been surprised but I guess I've become blase when it comes to horror:

"A masked killer goes on an unrelenting spree of murder, cannibalism and necrophilia."
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My thoughts were "Sure, whatever, how fucked up can it be? I bet it's gonna be some pg-13 shit". Instead it's a lot more like a cross between Henry, Portrait of a Serial Killer and shit like Mermaid in a Manhole. The first 20 minutes include a girl being kidnapped, brought to a barn where she's attached, at which point he proceeds to undress her, fuck her with a machette, graphically cut a breast off, cut her legs off, show them to her, then cut her head off, leave with the head, go back home, take a spoon and take out an eye, then eat it while it drips over himself, then fuck the head. And then the movie gets worse.

It's disgusting, it's trash, the acting is terrible, it's something you shouldn't watch sober. So the rating is either 5/5 if you want to watch the kind of shit I wrote in the spoiler, or 0/5 and stay the fuck away.
 
We watched The Thing (1982) last night and I was remarking to my wife how firearms are actually illegal via treaty down there. I'm not sure if they were back in the early 80s but they sure as hell are now. I was also telling her how those research stations turn into complete fuck fests because they're stocked with almost nothing but alcohol and DVDs.

Tonight, I'm going to show her one of my personal favorites; The Burning.
 
Re watched the original Halloween last night. Its impressive how slow boil it is. A lot of film focus' on myers presence as a background event while fleshing out his targets, a lot of times he's just watching them in the distance. He is very much a person shaped hole in the universe and the ambiguities about his nature, motives and typically his specific location when he's off screen really up the tension.
 
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