💥 Trainwreck Gloria Tesch / Sofia Nova - Author of the Maradonia series turned Republithot

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ActualKiwi said:
Car-washing scenes generally look better when you're not trying to do it with a limp hose and no water pressure..
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I wonder if that's intentional symbolism aimed at Gloria's intended audience, i.e all the Kengle-aged pervdads slobbering after her.

Peace and Harmony said:
I feel that we have an almost sacred duty to make this video famous on the level of "Friday". The world must know of this sublime masterpiece.
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Becoming viral would be a godsend to them. "Friday" was mocked to shit by people like us, but look at where Rebecca Black is now.
 
Phil Ken Sebben said:
I really want to say it's the worst music video I've ever seen. Glo Glo has no flow, charm, charisma or anything approaching talent. And yet with all that I've still seen worse. How sad is that? The best thing you can say is that it wasn't as bad as this:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=akL23VhXptc
It's still a terrible video though.
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Thats IceJJFish though. Its clearly a joke video. He even talks normally in one of his other videos
 
Another great comment (which will likely be deleted soon) on her video. (I have the screenshot; can someone please tell me how to use kiwi farms to host files?)
Cuck Norris said:
Pretty irresponsible to just be tossing money to the wind when your family is getting evicted for never making a mortgage payment, ever.
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ETA: Thank you @January Cyst!

And, along with Cuck Norris, we have a bonus -- Kengle!
 

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He Sets Me On Fire said:
Hold up, wait - Is she saying she's not into white guys? Or just "basic" white guys?
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Can someone explain to me what "basic bitch" and "fuck boy" mean? The first I don't understand at all and the 2nd should mean "faggot" in the caribbean and parts of africa but I think middle school kids have decided it means something else in 2016.
 
ChuckSlaughter said:
Can someone explain to me what "basic bitch" and "fuck boy" mean? The first I don't understand at all and the 2nd should mean "faggot" in the caribbean and parts of africa but I think middle school kids have decided it means something else in 2016.
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A "basic bitch" is a girl with no taste. The stereotype is Ugg boots, pumpkin spice lattes from Starbucks, and a preference for Taylor Swift.

A "fuckboy" is a guy with a very inflated sense of his own sexual appeal. He often has multiple photos of himself posing shirtless in front of the mirror on his OkCupid profile.
 
VLAD said:
A "basic bitch" is a girl with no taste. The stereotype is Ugg boots, pumpkin spice lattes from Starbucks, and a preference for Taylor Swift.
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That sounds like gloria if she lived somewhere with snow. Why people got to be racist against my people? Hasn't whitey suffered enough?
 
You can't even rent a 2007 unless it's a supercar most places, they used one of her friends cars. Renting a sweet really sweet convertible is like 300 max most places, I wouldn't really fault her for being stingy but the song is called convertible and the focus is someone else's "good value"-teir convertible.
upload_2016-1-13_18-10-24.png
 
Muscle Bra said:
And if you really received legal advice to cover the car's logo, I would hope that it would be to blur the logo, instead of superimposing an emoticon on it.

Stay classy, Glo-Glo.
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Yeah.It's really not that hard to set a mosaic filter to video like that...especially when the car's not even moving most of the time.
 
Clown Doll said:
Becoming viral would be a godsend to them. "Friday" was mocked to shit by people like us, but look at where Rebecca Black is now.
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The difference here being that Rebecca Black has a history of laughing at herself (like religiously watching and later appearing on Daily Grace even after Grace totally bashed both "Friday" and "My Moment") and seems like an overall decent enough kid who just wanted to be in a music video like every other young teen on Earth.

I mean seriously, I'll buy this girl a drink when she turns 21.

Saturday person.jpg


So yeah, the Tesch bitches don't really deserve to go viral.

Charles Kinbote said:
"Just legal reasons" View attachment 68214
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So she's just shying away from addressing the fact that they made it look like the car had an orgasm while she was washing it? What the hell is with all the ejaculation imagery, anyway? The water hose, the unicorn dildo things. I expect as much from a trashy music video, but what confuses me is how it's always Glo-Glo doing the symbolic ejaculation instead of being the one ejaculated on.

I dunno, I might be reading too much into this...
 
Peace and Harmony said:
New obsession?

View attachment 67762

kek

https://youtube.com/watch?v=yDqdF5-qRBM
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This is the most college-presentation-y thing I've ever seen. For some reason teenage girls tend to use certain mannerisms when giving school presentations, and this video is a concentrate of said mannerisms.
BTW I do not think you can learn a sport by hearing someone talk about it in a video.

Vicious.ink3 said:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=FXlUwCFo7VI
It has arrived.
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This has more musical talent in it and also more sex appeal:

 
I want to believe that they're intentionally going for shitty production value, but at the same time, I know that the Tesch clan just isn't that clever.
 
I attempted to transcribe the lyrics. Corrections would be welcome.
Convertible
Convertible
Convertible
Got my hair blowin' downwind.
Speedy drop-top
Doin' hun'red on the freeway
In case I get caught
By a cop.
I'm not worried.
I never get a ticket.
I'm always lookin' better than you.
Now get widdit. Ung!

Think about it.
You wanna ride with a driver,
Spendin' all that cash,
Come join the upper class!
Come and ride it. Ung!
You won't deny it. Ung!
Wanna get with this?
Try'n'a be like this?

Uh oh ooh.
Uh. I'm comin' through.
What'cha gonna do?
Ridin' in my new way (???) [0:57]
Bumpin' to some cool shit (???) [0:59]
In my convertible.

Ride my convertible.
In my convertible.
Lookin' so fine in my convertible.
In my convertible.
Ride my convertible.
In my convertible.
Lookin' so fine in my convertible.
Ride ride ride ride ride.

Ay!
Wanna watch me go all fast?
Wanna watch me go all slow?
My girls and I turned up,
threw our hands up like "Whoa!"
Drivin' down the causeway,
Passin' by some palm trees,
Chowin' down on a cheeseburger--
Man, I love them cheeseburgers!

Oh wait. I be like Rick Ross?
You can call me your new boss.
Passin' on the left
While I'm passin' to my right,
And my Aviator shades
Are keepin' out the light.
Ung! They're just keepin' out the light.

'Cause I'm GoldiLocks
with Lil Red
Seein' green for days,
Not catchin' reds.
I'm passin' on this yellow,
waivin' bye--oh, hello.
Livin' life, just doin' me,
Post Facebook, for all to see
My convertible and me.
My convertible and me.

Malibu.
I'm comin' through.
Whatcha go'n do?
Ridin' in my new way (???) [2:22]
Drivin' with some cool chicks.

Ride my convertible.
In my convertible.
Lookin' so fine in my convertible.
In my convertible.
Ride my convertible.
In my convertible.
Lookin' so fine in my convertible.

Bass in the trunk make the ceiling go missin'.
Bass in the trunk.
[Mix]

Convertible, convertible,
lookin' so fine in my convertible.
 
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