💥 Trainwreck Gloria Tesch / Sofia Nova - Author of the Maradonia series turned Republithot

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IJustWantToSeeAttachments said:
I bit the bullet and shelled out the $3 to buy the e-book on Amazon. Getting through it is... difficult, but I've decided to do an audiobook to help ease the pain.
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You have the patience of a saint. I couldn't do that.

To the people who think Gloria isn't attractive, it's an eye of the beholder thing. Physically, yes, she's attractive I think, and she's got a nice body, but her personality is so off-putting that it negates her physical attractiveness. Also, she seems to have two, and only two facial expressions: Fake plastic smile and not-sexy-but-i-think-it-is stare, and that's off-putting too. I wanna see a pic of her when she's pissed off, just to see if she actually can express real emotions.
 
F. Hausdorff said:
Meh, the same "debate" comes up whenever people talk about buying Chris' medallions or whatever. At the end of day, Gloria isn't doing anything illegal, so if people feel that they have money to spend, so be it.
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It's not illegal and I have no problem with her trying to make a buck. I just don't want to be one of the people that's giving her the money.
 
Okay. I downloaded the Kindle app and previewed the book.

I haven't even gotten through all the chapters yet and already I can feel my brain trying to commit suicide and escape out my ear. This is bad. This is really fucking bad. It literally reads like a rough draft before it goes through any kind of editing.

The language is off. There's no real way to describe other than it sounds like somebody who doesn't speak English and does a word for word translation of the text into English with all the pitfalls and errors that come with that. Her spelling is off. I mean referring to the head of a school as the "principle"? Not just once, no she makes this mistake over and over again. And let me remind everybody that her Daddy is not only the co-author of this travesty but the editor as well.

People don't speak normally and when they do they all sound the same. It's almost as if the person writing this only used one voice.

Then there's the problem with Gloria... I mean Mary Sue... I mean Maya. We're told, several times, in the first chapter alone how beautiful she is. Joey only seems to show up when it's convenient for him to do so after all, the only person worth talking about is Maya. There's the mean girl who's job it is to be mean and literally that's her only defining characteristic. Maya suddenly gains a level in badass and kicks the bad girl's butt thus making her super popular at the same time. There's something about a party and them going to the beach.

That's the first four chapters. Other stuff might have happened in the meanwhile but I was having trouble concentrating as just about anything was more interesting than continuing to read this.

If the book is any indication of what is to come the movie is going to be so bad that it might actually move into the pantheon of "so bad it's good" movies.
 
Phil Ken Sebben said:
Okay. I downloaded the Kindle app and previewed the book.

I haven't even gotten through all the chapters yet and already I can feel my brain trying to commit suicide and escape out my ear. This is bad. This is really fucking bad. It literally reads like a rough draft before it goes through any kind of editing.

The language is off. There's no real way to describe other than it sounds like somebody who doesn't speak English and does a word for word translation of the text into English with all the pitfalls and errors that come with that. Her spelling is off. I mean referring to the head of a school as the "principle"? Not just once, no she makes this mistake over and over again. And let me remind everybody that her Daddy is not only the co-author of this travesty but the editor as well.

People don't speak normally and when they do they all sound the same. It's almost as if the person writing this only used one voice.

Then there's the problem with Gloria... I mean Mary Sue... I mean Maya. We're told, several times, in the first chapter alone how beautiful she is. Joey only seems to show up when it's convenient for him to do so after all, the only person worth talking about is Maya. There's the mean girl who's job it is to be mean and literally that's her only defining characteristic. Maya suddenly gains a level in badass and kicks the bad girl's butt thus making her super popular at the same time. There's something about a party and them going to the beach.

That's the first four chapters. Other stuff might have happened in the meanwhile but I was having trouble concentrating as just about anything was more interesting than continuing to read this.

If the book is any indication of what is to come the movie is going to be so bad that it might actually move into the pantheon of "so bad it's good" movies.
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I did laugh my ass off at the club of evil singing the mother earth song.
Its worth considering the books have gone through a couple of revisions and have only gotten worse.

Theres a pretty LOL worthy moment in the second book when Gloria warns us about the evils of salsa dancing.
 
F. Hausdorff said:
Excerpt of dialogue, perhaps?
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"Yeah, you are right Maya. I really feel it in my spirit and I can also see it with my inner eye that I have changed during this journey. I don't know Maya, how you feel, but I don't have the right words to explain all of the changes which took place within me, but when I look back and I see where we came from and how we were fighting at home in the normal world for all these dumb little things, like T-shirts, colored pencils, paper pads, books and... and... and... I realize that I grew inside of myself and that I am at least ten years wiser.

We see things mostly not as they really are, we see the things as we are or as we want to see them,"Joey said.


I copied exactly from the book (grammatical errors included). I did not put that last sentence in italics. Gloria did.
 
IJustWantToSeeAttachments said:
"Yeah, you are right Maya. I really feel it in my spirit and I can also see it with my inner eye that I have changed during this journey. I don't know Maya, how you feel, but I don't have the right words to explain all of the changes which took place within me, but when I look back and I see where we came from and how we were fighting at home in the normal world for all these dumb little things, like T-shirts, colored pencils, paper pads, books and... and... and... I realize that I grew inside of myself and that I am at least ten years wiser.

We see things mostly not as they really are, we see the things as we are or as we want to see them,"Joey said.


I copied exactly from the book (grammatical errors included). I did not put that last sentence in italics. Gloria did.
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The hell is this? This looks like the lower end of fanfiction.net's writing. I'm half expecting to hear some sperging about how Naruto loves Maya or some shit now.
 
Sweet and Savoury said:
It is painful to read, I could not get pass chapter 3

and I read Milton in high school!
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I have a friend who collects really terrible novels, mostly self published shit.
He made me read Gloria and Robert Staneks first books in return for helping me move. Its was torture and there was a test at the end.
I read the rest of the Maradonia series for laughs.
 
DykesDykesChina said:
https://youtube.com/watch?v=uusCDpy7HwU
Unfortunately the video quality is too low to reveal Gloria's facial expression clearly.
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Nice to see her handling criticism so well.

Theres a part of me that actually respects her for taking action rather than crying on the internet like the rest of the lol cows.
But its gloria and nothing she does is worthy of respect.
 
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Blarmination said:
Do we know that they were fighting over Maradonia though?
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Someone over on goodreads said it was actually due to her calling Gloria on all her false fame shit and the fact shes just some home schooled trust fund baby.
So not so much it being over Maradonia but more a case of Gloria being a massive fake and non-entity.
 
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When her writing "career" inevitably fails, she's got a great future as an underground fighter. Guys pay big money to see attractive women pound the crap out of each other. Is their any indication she faced charges over that? I mean, there were witnesses, a video, and it's pretty clear Gloria was the aggressor. Or did her parents once again shield her from the consequences of her actions?
 
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