Dragon Age: The Veilguard - A woke disaster? Yep!

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Are u woke enough for this game?

  • Hell yeah, I want play it with my wife's son

    Votes: 170 9.4%

  • Nope, I need to suck more girlcock first

    Votes: 393 21.8%

  • Yasss, I identify as an autistic dwarf of color

    Votes: 377 20.9%

  • Nah, I rather play Fallout76

    Votes: 862 47.8%
  • Total voters
    1,803
The Ugly One said:
But enough about Star Wars already.
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Or He Man, or Star Trek, or Ninja Turtles, or Scooby Doo, etc.
Interestingly when they can't make a new character they'll rewrite a side character to the point it's unrecognisable from the original and thus "theirs".

The Ugly One said:
You have to strike when the iron is hot. The best Dragon Age game is still Origins, which is 15 years old. Inquisition is now ten years old and is widely regarded as bland and bit woke, but better than II, which is mostly reviled. A decade later, where is the demand for a new Dragon Age supposed to be coming from?
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Gamers have a weird ass issue where they'll obsess over a single game if it had enough hype, no matter how many shitty sequels it has. Like Vampire the Masquerade, that had an incredibly broken release and had to be fixed by fans, and everything that came afterwards is absolutely shit.
 
Tor Lugosi said:
I think Morrigan's subplot has the most amount of variations to it. The head Grey Warden during one of the big story missions changed depending on a couple of variables. Beyond that, it was mostly cameos and a handful of references.
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Who's ruling Ferelden depends on what happens to Alistair, but it's surprisingly irrelevant -- it doesn't even change the outcome of any war table missions, though it does change the flavor text of a few. Whee!

Who accompanies you and subsequently dies in the Fade is one of the game's most egregious fuckups when it comes to consequences. The original choice was going to be Hawke or the original Warden. But ... the Warden can be dead, and supposedly they couldn't figure out a satisfying way to do the Warden's voice. So the choice becomes Hawke or one of either Alistair or Loghain. Now that's still a pretty weighty choice, and I personally love the opportunity for Loghain to finally redeem himself.

Except ... Loghain can be dead (and I imagine many players if not most don't spare him), and making Alistair king is such a popular choice I really wonder how many people don't do it. Plus, Alistair can also be dead or exiled! So who's left? Who's most likely to end up in that spot?

Stroud. Some random Warden from DA2 who's only at all memorable because he's the one who saves your sibling if you brought them into the Deep Roads. I remember having absolutely no idea who he was during my first DAI playthrough, and I'd bet I'm not alone.

A complete waste.
 
Imagine paying 70 bucks to get fucking fucked on a video game. The absolute state of videogames in 2024 1000054646.jpg
 
Anyone remember when Aveline would always choose the boring guy at the office in spite of your attempts to flirt(whether you were male or female).

I like instant gratification as much as the next guy, but every character being entirely into the player is just nonsensical.

Mola Ram said:
Who's ruling Ferelden depends on what happens to Alistair, but it's surprisingly irrelevant -- it doesn't even change the outcome of any war table missions, though it does change the flavor text of a few. Whee!

Who accompanies you and subsequently dies in the Fade is one of the game's most egregious fuckups when it comes to consequences. The original choice was going to be Hawke or the original Warden. But ... the Warden can be dead, and supposedly they couldn't figure out a satisfying way to do the Warden's voice. So the choice becomes Hawke or one of either Alistair or Loghain. Now that's still a pretty weighty choice, and I personally love the opportunity for Loghain to finally redeem himself.

Except ... Loghain can be dead (and I imagine many players if not most don't spare him), and making Alistair king is such a popular choice I really wonder how many people don't do it. Plus, Alistair can also be dead or exiled! So who's left? Who's most likely to end up in that spot?

Stroud. Some random Warden from DA2 who's only at all memorable because he's the one who saves your sibling if you brought them into the Deep Roads. I remember having absolutely no idea who he was during my first DAI playthrough, and I'd bet I'm not alone.

A complete waste.
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It’s a consequence of video games having linear narratives at all.

They are never bringing the Warden back, a silent protagonist that you can customize a myriad of different ways with six different backstories. The best we can get is Leliana or Alistair or Morrigan referring to them.

Stroud is the place holder NPC-which makes the choice in Inquisition so much easier unless you really dislike Hawke or DA2 or you want to roleplay as caring more about the wardens.
 
Ishtar said:
Anyone remember when Aveline would always choose the boring guy at the office in spite of your attempts to flirt(whether you were male or female).

I like instant gratification as much as the next guy, but every character being entirely into the player is just nonsensical.
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I wasn't the biggest fan of the romance options for straight dudes in DAI, but I have to give them credit: those characters had defined sexualities. You can flirt with Dorian and he lets you down gently (and is suitably flattered); Sera laughs at you; and my favorite, everyone thought from her look that Cassandra was a butch lesbian, but she's straight as an arrow.

Maybe they didn't want any seething about that.
 
I believe a female inquisitor can actually say “you lead me on” in frustration to Dorian.

Cassandra is a secret romantic at heart, and BioWare does like it’s “ice queens or bitchy women that are secretly really soft and lovable” trope.
 
Holy FUCK this looked awful. It's like a mobile game. There is virtually no Dragon Age DNA to be found here at all. If Varric and Solas weren't present and you called this Dungeons and Dickholes, Revenge of the Bad Dragon, I would believe it.

I also love that the protagonist in this open ended RPG is constantly talking entirely on their own eighty percent of the time, with your choices just being "Yes," or "Yes, but slightly different." Especially loved how the protagonist is ready to throw their life away to save a random woman unprompted. Guess you can't be a bad guy this time. Thanks Bioware.
wtfNeedSignUp said:
Killing Varric after using him to get people to buy the game is so on-point for modern writers it's nearly guaranteed. Killing him immediately after the demo end is just kicking people in the balls.
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So it's yet another game where they brought in some childless wine-aunt to lead the development of a AAA game and her only idea was to turn it into one of the vapid fucking sitcoms she watches. Hilarious. The backlash to this is going to be astonishing.
 
wtfNeedSignUp said:
Or He Man, or Star Trek, or Ninja Turtles, or Scooby Doo, etc.
Interestingly when they can't make a new character they'll rewrite a side character to the point it's unrecognisable from the original and thus "theirs".


Gamers have a weird ass issue where they'll obsess over a single game if it had enough hype, no matter how many shitty sequels it has. Like Vampire the Masquerade, that had an incredibly broken release and had to be fixed by fans, and everything that came afterwards is absolutely shit.
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Gamers seem to have no sense of time or personnel. The people who did DA:O are gone. None of the human creativity that brought Dragon Age into being is still there to be tapped, it's all troons and fat dangerhairs. Perhaps it's because replaying a game makes it feel immediate again and makes it easy to forget how old it is. It's like how people still think Half-Life 3 can happen. The band broke up. It's gone. Valve is a services company, and Gabe Newell is a filthy rich old man surrounded by whores. But when you play Half-Life 2, it feels like 2004 again, and you forget just how long a period of time twenty years is.
 
The Ugly One said:
Gamers seem to have no sense of time or personnel. The people who did DA:O are gone. None of the human creativity that brought Dragon Age into being is still there to be tapped, it's all troons and fat dangerhairs. Perhaps it's because replaying a game makes it feel immediate again and makes it easy to forget how old it is. It's like how people still think Half-Life 3 can happen. The band broke up. It's gone. Valve is a services company, and Gabe Newell is a filthy rich old man surrounded by whores. But when you play Half-Life 2, it feels like 2004 again, and you forget just how long a period of time twenty years is.
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Reminds me of how people got so worked up over the Fallout show and how it handled House and New Vegas. "They've destroyed any chance of a New Vegas 2!" Kids, that horse has been dead for years.
 
Mola Ram said:
Reminds me of how people got so worked up over the Fallout show and how it handled House and New Vegas. "They've destroyed any chance of a New Vegas 2!" Kids, that horse has been dead for years.
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That should have been painfully obvious when outer worlds dropped. If anyone had hopes for a NV2 after that, they're actually retarded.
 
Tablet County said:
Who'd have thought that the gay man with the curly moustache with a persecuted homo backstory would've been one of the best characters in the game?
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Apart from his Very Special Episode ... About Homophobia personal quest, he's one of the best companions in the game. I was really hoping with the focus on Tevinter he'd be a returning party member, but alas.

Inquisition, for all its flaws, might be the last hurrah for BioWare games with companions you actually cared about. I don't even know the names of most of the ones from Andromeda, and these ones look to be a solid mass of cringe.
 
I think Baulders Gate 3 is really going to set a precedent for party based story RPG's where all companions are"Player Sexual". In an effort to make everyone feel accepted and please everyone, they've made every companion feel a lot less of a defined character.
 
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