Dragon Age: The Veilguard - A woke disaster? Yep!

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Are u woke enough for this game?

  • Hell yeah, I want play it with my wife's son

    Votes: 170 9.4%

  • Nope, I need to suck more girlcock first

    Votes: 393 21.8%

  • Yasss, I identify as an autistic dwarf of color

    Votes: 377 20.9%

  • Nah, I rather play Fallout76

    Votes: 862 47.8%
  • Total voters
    1,803
Rockzo said:
Tarsh: Straight up asks if Rook wants to have sex with her.
Rook: Admits to a fantasy where they get pushed into the wall.
Tarsh; Proceeds to kabedon and then neck kiss and growl at Rook, who likes this.
Get this face:
View attachment 6590328

There is so much wrong with this scene. Tarsh has no intimacy. Just straight out asking for sex like talking to her mother by saying she's "non-binary". There's no tact or personal connection to Rook in the scene.
Take Morrigan and Leliana for example. Morrigan flirts with a male Warden by saying her tent is cold & the Warden can tell her to get a thicker blanket and Leliana talks in circles with a female Warden where she drops hints but said Warden is too dense and wants to write in a Journal instead. Humanizing connections that lead up to the scene, building intimacy.
All gone because Tarsh just straight up asks for sex.

Second thing about the scene, takes away player agency. They may initiate the romance but it's Tarsh that's dominating the scene. Maybe some people like this sort of thing and want to get dominated by a 8 foot tall Qunari but that doesn't appeal to me. I think Sera in Inquisition was like that if you went Qunari in that.

Third, Rook is utterly passive in the scene. Tarsh leans over in a very aggressive masculine manner. Then growls to show how feral she is and people are supposed to find this appealing.
View attachment 6590364

Once you realize Tarsh is a self insert, everything makes sense. An OC specially created and self inserted into the story. This is fetish fuel for the writer to remind you of who's in charge and you as the player through Rook have no input into the scene at all.
Click to expand...
I get that the schtick is that this Tarsh character is meant to be socially inept or whatever but so was Alistair only he was charming. This is like if Alistair was a robot.
 
Rockzo said:
untitled-png.6590328
Click to expand...

This looks like a still from a nightmare so bad you want to either wake up, or just die so it stops. Jesus Christ!
 
I’m just relieved Alistair seems to be dead from the blight or whatever so they don’t have some awful ruination of his character as well. Are Cullen or Cole in this one or do they just pretend they don’t exist either
 
El-ahrairah said:
I’m just relieved Alistair seems to be dead from the blight or whatever so they don’t have some awful ruination of his character as well. Are Cullen or Cole in this one or do they just pretend they don’t exist either
Click to expand...
Stop mentioning better characters. They might just release a DLC that makes your worst nightmares come true.
 
Rockzo said:
Tarsh: Straight up asks if Rook wants to have sex with her.
Rook: Admits to a fantasy where they get pushed into the wall.
Tarsh; Proceeds to kabedon and then neck kiss and growl at Rook, who likes this.
Get this face:
View attachment 6590328

There is so much wrong with this scene. Tarsh has no intimacy. Just straight out asking for sex like talking to her mother by saying she's "non-binary". There's no tact or personal connection to Rook in the scene.
Take Morrigan and Leliana for example. Morrigan flirts with a male Warden by saying her tent is cold & the Warden can tell her to get a thicker blanket and Leliana talks in circles with a female Warden where she drops hints but said Warden is too dense and wants to write in a Journal instead. Humanizing connections that lead up to the scene, building intimacy.
All gone because Tarsh just straight up asks for sex.

Second thing about the scene, takes away player agency. They may initiate the romance but it's Tarsh that's dominating the scene. Maybe some people like this sort of thing and want to get dominated by a 8 foot tall Qunari but that doesn't appeal to me. I think Sera in Inquisition was like that if you went Qunari in that.

Third, Rook is utterly passive in the scene. Tarsh leans over in a very aggressive masculine manner. Then growls to show how feral she is and people are supposed to find this appealing.
View attachment 6590364

Once you realize Tarsh is a self insert, everything makes sense. An OC specially created and self inserted into the story. This is fetish fuel for the writer to remind you of who's in charge and you as the player through Rook have no input into the scene at all.
Click to expand...
This entire game seems like shit tier self insert fan fiction written by autistic teen virgins who collect mental issues off of tik tok.
 
Mola Ram said:
The cornerstone of liking this game seems to be sunk cost and mental illness. Ghil Dirthalen, who's been doing Dragon Age videos for years now, drops her review, and the last couple of minutes of it need to be heard to be believed. "[voice literally choking with tears] I know Veilguard wasn't perfect, but it was perfect for me." Quelle horreur!

https://youtube.com/watch?v=rcTvs_Wg1kk
Click to expand...
I think she came out after the game's announcement and said she helped the devs with all the lore shit.
No wonder she'd be hurting having her name, heart and soul tied to this pile of shit.
 
I always wondered if the faggots whining about boob armour are too dumb to actually notice that, aside from non western games, boob armor stopped existing in gaming for over a decade by now, or/and they don't actually play anything from the last decade so they still think boob armor exists.
 
I guess I would be the target audience in terms of being a “tourist.” I have never been into rpgs, but just downloaded witcher 3 and dragon age inquisition just cause I heard the hype. Played on ps5 again I’m a casual. Also love all forms of gow Greek and Norse.

Putting aside the woke stuff, the companions here look like they fucking suck. There’s no best girl leiliana or Josephine or a triss/ciri type. I’m not into fat girls or trannies. So can’t romance any. The dudes look generic. That’s my biggest reason not getting it. So I have no interest in them.

Also I know being a sports guy how much the frostbite engine fucking sucks.

I just started listening to the vows of vengeance podcast cause it looked interesting. Lmao Nadia/Elio/drayden are more compelling characters than any of these characters I have seen in play throughs. That podcast seems darker than the game. Would have loved to have seen them, but instead we got all the uglies and generic dudes
 
BlankSpaceBaby said:
SPOILER if you romance the dapper necromancer.
He's not human. He's... wait, how does one fuck that thing?!!

Vid here to avoid thumbnail spoilage: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZsMNvW__DPw&ab_channel=NaughtyGaming

ETA: What is with the ugly onesies these characters wear as underwear? Makes me also miss the white panties in the first game.

Second edit: Looks like NikTek has this game on their radar. YAAAS MAWMA.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=jKKzvmNon_8
Click to expand...

Hooked on phobics said:
Oh FFS. I thought undertale fags wanting to fuck papyrus was cringe, but that was a cartoon skeleton so more dismiss-able as general autism. This is literally wanting to bone a boney boner. Even setting aside faggotry, the hell are you going to do with a skeleton, stick it between the ribs and call it a ribjob?

I hate this game even more now, and didn't think that was possible.
Click to expand...

Should I bother to spoiler this? I don't know if anyone genuinely cares enough, but can we address the big skeletal elephant in the room...

I actually thought Emmerich was the best of a bad bunch where companions were concerned. He's a dignified older gay man with shades of Vincent Price in his appearance, I can get behind that (if you'll pardon the expression) - though personally, I think he just should have been an older Dorian. Dorian as an old queen, because let's be honest, that's Dorian's final form. I wonder if their decision not to do that has something to do with the modern day LGBT+ movement's Peter Pan syndrome-esque obsession with youth.

But boning bones? I didn't sign up for that.
Thanks for not disclosing your true nature until it was too late and making me a necrophile.

How do you kiss him? He's got no lips!!
 
Last edited:
@Miriam Margoyles He did confide in Rook. Early on he blabbed his issues to Rook - because that's what you do to strangers, of course -
and he's very, very scared of dying to the point of phobia. Luckily, there is a bunch of super secret cabal of lich supreme that is willing to help him become one of the immortal protectors, so yay, now he can be a lich, he don't have to confront his worst fears, and he can bone, ahem, Rook until Rook dies of old age or something.

IMO, this is the most memorable romance, maybe for the wrong reasons, but the visuals are straight out Disney, Emmrich voice actor isn't bad (even if the lip movements rarely sync with the lines, sigh), and the romance arc is not too formulaic.
 
Actually, the more that I think about it, I think I know the reason why Emmerich is a new character, as opposed to just an older Dorian (which I still think would've been better).

Dorian was a bitch.

And not in a Twitter approved, sassy "YAAAS QUEEN" kind of way.

If Dorian didn't like you, he'd just be a total sarcastic arsehole. And we can't have that in BIoware's new super magic best friends simulator.
 
I have serious doubts about that SmashJT story; I'll believe it when I see it.

Ever since Endymion "broke" the Ubisoft story, everyone suddenly has an inside connection to AAA studios now. They're all Doomcock now, I guess.
 
This is the first time I see this part past the first few seconds. It was ridiculous but now that I see the whole scene, jesus fuck.
If this long scene was posted already, sorry.


 
Rockzo said:
Tarsh: Straight up asks if Rook wants to have sex with her.
Rook: Admits to a fantasy where they get pushed into the wall.
Tarsh; Proceeds to kabedon and then neck kiss and growl at Rook, who likes this.
Get this face:
View attachment 6590328

There is so much wrong with this scene. Tarsh has no intimacy. Just straight out asking for sex like talking to her mother by saying she's "non-binary". There's no tact or personal connection to Rook in the scene.
Take Morrigan and Leliana for example. Morrigan flirts with a male Warden by saying her tent is cold & the Warden can tell her to get a thicker blanket and Leliana talks in circles with a female Warden where she drops hints but said Warden is too dense and wants to write in a Journal instead. Humanizing connections that lead up to the scene, building intimacy.
All gone because Tarsh just straight up asks for sex.

Second thing about the scene, takes away player agency. They may initiate the romance but it's Tarsh that's dominating the scene. Maybe some people like this sort of thing and want to get dominated by a 8 foot tall Qunari but that doesn't appeal to me. I think Sera in Inquisition was like that if you went Qunari in that.

Third, Rook is utterly passive in the scene. Tarsh leans over in a very aggressive masculine manner. Then growls to show how feral she is and people are supposed to find this appealing.
View attachment 6590364

Once you realize Tarsh is a self insert, everything makes sense. An OC specially created and self inserted into the story. This is fetish fuel for the writer to remind you of who's in charge and you as the player through Rook have no input into the scene at all.
Click to expand...

How tall is Patrick Weekes? Do we think he wishes to be the dommy mommy? 🤔
 
El-ahrairah said:
I’m just relieved Alistair seems to be dead from the blight or whatever so they don’t have some awful ruination of his character as well. Are Cullen or Cole in this one or do they just pretend they don’t exist either
Click to expand...
I'm really surprised Cullen isn't in this game, he was probably the most popular pairing in the fanfiction scene where most of the fanbase seems to congragrate. Just searching the dragon age inquisition stories there's like 15,000 different ones between the Cullen and the different variations of the Inquisitor.
 
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