Culinary Atrocities - Crimes against food

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Bugaboo said:
My Grandma literally has food in her basement from the year 2000, and she thinks it's fine to eat
Also yes, she has a resident evil fridge
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If it is canned or in a jar and the top doesn't bulge, it might not be bad. It might just taste bland.

Also I cannot think of cooking atrocities unless they are made of garbage or just are bad combinations.
 
Bugaboo said:
My Grandma literally has food in her basement from the year 2000, and she thinks it's fine to eat
Also yes, she has a resident evil fridge
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If Ashens is anything to go by, non-perishables (the name being somewhat of a misnomer, there are very few actual non-perishable foods that aren't salt, sugar or vinegar) can still be 'safe' to consume, - i.e. you won't get infected by it, but you might get some funky chemical reactions in your body when you eat it - if completely inedible. That said, this guy must have a stomach of iron given the average age of the out of date stuff he taste tests being between 10 and 40 years old.
 
Mettaton EX said:
That said, this guy must have a stomach of iron given the average age of the out of date stuff he taste tests being between 10 and 40 years old.
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Like freezer burned meat, it usually isn't a matter of safety but quality (although eventually meat does go actually bad). I.e. it probably won't kill you but it will be utterly disgusting.

There's an even crazier guy who eats shit from all the way back to the U.S. Civil War.

 
AnOminous said:
Like freezer burned meat, it usually isn't a matter of safety but quality (although eventually meat does go actually bad). I.e. it probably won't kill you but it will be utterly disgusting.

There's an even crazier guy who eats shit from all the way back to the U.S. Civil War.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=Ga5JrN9DrVI
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To be fair, hardtack pretty much qualified as a culinary atrocity even when it was fresh.
 
Cafe Mocha said:
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Point of order:
Haggis is generally regarded as Scottish (and they're more than welcome to keep it).
Jellied eels are poverty food and should be regarded as such.
Stargazy pie is Cornish, and they're fucking weird.
Breastmilk ice cream is weird, but it was intentionally made to be weird.
Marmite, yeah OK. That stuff's weird. I'm one of the few Brits that's largely ambivalent about it, TBH.

You want a culinary horror, go check out Black Pudding. It's delicious, but most people really can't hack what goes into making it.
 
MerriedxReldnahc said:
Yall ever heard of "cheese racing"? Basically the participants each toss a piece of processed cheese, plastic on, onto a hot grill and let it heat up so the plastic expands. Whoever's cheese explodes first wins. You get the added bonus of molten plastic adhering to whatever you try to cook next.
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I was worried cheese racing had to do with the spray cheese

https://webmshare.com/mPze8

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UncleMoeLester said:
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"Pasteurized process topping." It's actually illegal to call this stuff cheese. I once accidentally got it. It is shit.

Serves me right for being too lazy to shred some myself, but when I'm lazy now, I always look for the word "cheese" prominently on the package.
 
"Partially Hydrogenated Soybean Oil" is also the primary ingredient in that nasty fake chocolate that they sell at dollar stores too. You can make anything out of that crap.
 
Super Collie said:
"Partially Hydrogenated Soybean Oil" is also the primary ingredient in that nasty fake chocolate that they sell at dollar stores too. You can make anything out of that crap.
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It's practically poisonous and is basically concentrated transfat.
 
anyone want some bacon and cheese stuffed pizza burger?
bacon and cheese stuffed pizza burger.jpg


Or how about pineapple, banana and curry pizza?
pineapple, banana and curry pizza.jpg

pea-and-mayonnaise-pizza.jpg

hummer pizza.jpg
 
Tetraphobia said:
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A lobster died to make that pizza.

Gym Leader Elesa said:
I've never had tuna casserole, or known any family that makes it. Is it that common? Does it suck that much?
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Its actually very delicious if done right. Honestly one of my favs growing up. Its the poor mans seafood fettuccine alfredo. Just with Tuna and Egg Noodles rather then shrimp and fettuccine.
 
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heymate said:
Can we just sign a petition to Congress to get this crap outlawed? Or would that be unconstitutional somehow?

Never mind, I’m sure a bunch of people don’t mind this so-called “cheese”, so I guess it has to stay. Besides, nacho cheese isn’t real, and I like nacho cheese.
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I once knew a guy who was so disgusted by that canned nacho cheese sauce that the smell alone would make him dry heave. He worked at a movie theater that served nachos with the cheese sauce dispensed with one of those pump-style ketchup dispensers. One day the pump got clogged resulting in the dispenser becoming pressurized and blowing apart getting cheese sauce everywhere in the process. He immediately ran into the back room and started vomiting into the utility sink.
 
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