🍽️ حلال Connor Bible - Everyone's Favorite Molly Ringwald loving, adoption hating, aspiring writer and bellybutton fucker

  • Want to keep track of this thread?
    Accounts can bookmark posts, watch threads for updates, and jump back to where you stopped reading.
    Create account

Which Connor is the most amusing?

  • Semi-Motivated Connor, aka "I've written 200 words on my new story and took a walk with my grandma."

    Votes: 127 13.2%
  • Depressed Connor, or "Give me one reason why I shouldn't blow my brains out."

    Votes: 73 7.6%
  • Edgy Rebel Without a Cause Connor, or "Shut the fuck up you stupid motherfuckering faggots!"

    Votes: 529 55.0%
  • Smug Pseudo-Intellectual Connor or "I've read Bret Easton Ellis, you guys!"

    Votes: 232 24.1%

  • Total voters
    961
You inspired me to do a reading of that post.

It's a little autistic.

Well, considering the source material. . .

also who the fuck would name a child "Jupiter"
though it's either hamfisted reference to the Roman god (whose wife was Juno) or the planet (& currently the spacecraft Juno is en route there to probe it or some shit)
basically it's Connor's way of reminding us how smart he is
 
Well, considering the source material. . .

also who the fuck would name a child "Jupiter"
though it's either hamfisted reference to the Roman god (whose wife was Juno) or the planet (& currently the spacecraft Juno is en route there to probe it or some shit)
basically it's Connor's way of reminding us how smart he is
I remember in a book I read in middle school there was a character nicknamed Jupiter because he was really big and fat. Maybe his character is based on himself, i dunno.
 
Well, considering the source material. . .

also who the fuck would name a child "Jupiter"
though it's either hamfisted reference to the Roman god (whose wife was Juno) or the planet (& currently the spacecraft Juno is en route there to probe it or some shit)
basically it's Connor's way of reminding us how smart he is
The worst part of this is that Jupiter is Juno's husband in the myths.

Could this be Connors subconscious working out some sort of Oedipus complex?

:ween: :alog:
 
I remember in a book I read in middle school there was a character nicknamed Jupiter because he was really big and fat. Maybe his character is based on himself, i dunno.
I remember that. It was a series called "The Three Investigators". Jupiter Jones was the brains of the operation, I think there was a guy named Bill who was the muscle and possibly another one called Bob. It's been a long time though so don't quote me on that.
 
Well, considering the source material. . .

also who the fuck would name a child "Jupiter"
though it's either hamfisted reference to the Roman god (whose wife was Juno) or the planet (& currently the spacecraft Juno is en route there to probe it or some shit)
basically it's Connor's way of reminding us how smart he is
Don't worry, I corrected that shit forever ago.

It's blasé but I think it's supposed to be. Juno and Bleaker end the movie as if nothing happened and that's life sometimes. The moral I got out of it is no matter what happens, be it pregnancy or divorce, you can still have control over your life.

ALSO! Jupiter was Juno 's husband, her sons were Mars and Vulcan.
 
I think Connor should work on giving Alphaboy some emotional weaknesses. I mean, edgy Kryptonite "dark rocks" and "anti-Alphamatter" make for a dramatic fight scene, but it'd be cool to see Zauzer, who's physically weaker, fight back mentally against Alphaboy. Teenagers are basically walking piles of instabilities, right? Play off how those are reflected in his abilities.
 
I think Connor should work on giving Alphaboy some emotional weaknesses. I mean, edgy Kryptonite "dark rocks" and "anti-Alphamatter" make for a dramatic fight scene, but it'd be cool to see Zauzer, who's physically weaker, fight back mentally against Alphaboy. Teenagers are basically walking piles of instabilities, right? Play off how those are reflected in his abilities.

I don't think Connor can grasp the idea of a character with insecurities and vulnerabilities. His narcissism and autism prevent him from understanding human emotions on anything other than a superficial level.
 
I think Connor should work on giving Alphaboy some emotional weaknesses. I mean, edgy Kryptonite "dark rocks" and "anti-Alphamatter" make for a dramatic fight scene, but it'd be cool to see Zauzer, who's physically weaker, fight back mentally against Alphaboy. Teenagers are basically walking piles of instabilities, right? Play off how those are reflected in his abilities.
But Alpbaboy is the hero. He's supposed to be emotionally stable and wise beyond his years. What heresy would dictate otherwise?

In all seriousness, I'm interested in this whole idea of a superhero known and publicized in the social media under his real name instead of an alias. Probably being optimistic but I'm holding out some hope here.
 
Connor Bible: Here's how I see it: we open with a helicopter fly over shot of Janus City, Illinois, while Frank Sinatra's Fly Me to the Moon plays.

Annnnd I'm out.

To be honest, I actually prefer the opening of Shinji SHAUN Sean getting ready for school and giving a minor introduction to his powers. I liked him seeming a little peeved at the power incontinence since it opened up some characterization and told us this is a regular occurrence for him much like waking up with a zit on your nose would be.

Don't go for movie stuff. Really, don't.

I think Connor should work on giving Alphaboy some emotional weaknesses. I mean, edgy Kryptonite "dark rocks" and "anti-Alphamatter" make for a dramatic fight scene, but it'd be cool to see Zauzer, who's physically weaker, fight back mentally against Alphaboy. Teenagers are basically walking piles of instabilities, right? Play off how those are reflected in his abilities.
I agree.
EDIT: no more powerleveling

Seriously, give Sean/Alphaboy some actual vices and insecurities, something that isn't necessarily physical. Especially since he's a teenager. It'd make him more relatable, which is what you want. You shouldn't try to go for the coolest thing ever; you should aim for what's relatable. That helps make it more memorable and the audience will be more likely to accept and identify with the character.

EDIT: I'd also like to add a little bit of advice I read that was being given to DisneyFan01 of all people.

Give Sean some core aspects of his personality, because honestly @Connor Bible you should be focusing on Sean right now instead of how movie-like you want to open your story. Who is Sean? What are some core things about him?
What does he believe in? (Beliefs that can change, and beliefs he will stick by no matter what.)

What makes Sean who he is? Focus on that and defining Sean's powers before you get into all of this other stuff.
 
Last edited:
here's your most recent screencap with today's hijinks!
[MEDIA=pastebin]pa8qymZw[/MEDIA]
:semperfidelis: My God, it's like everything that makes for an amazing Connor post rolled into one ball of spergery.

---"I came up here with for a more attention grabbing opening for Alphaboy." Edited for accuracy
---"He steps off the walkway and falls into the diamond hundreds of feet below. He doesn't come back up." No shit, Connor, anyone without autism knows that people who fall to their deaths don't just fly back up unscathed. In fact, I feel most people with autism are also aware of this.
---"I visualize it in my mind like a movie." "Connor, you shouldn't do that, it can really mess you up." "WOW I KNOW THAT JEEZ"
---"I CAME UP WITH A WEAKNESS FOR ALPHABOY ISN'T THAT GREAT"
---"I've been busy doing shit with my grandma :c"
---back to sperging about Molay Ringwood despite swearing off of her months ago

Connor should really just write screenplays, goddamn. Or movie reviews. I'd read the fuck out of those.
 
Maybe alphaboy's weakness can be how at night he is kept up with homoerotic thoughts and the villain can exploit that for a hot makeout scene
 
Connor can't seem to realise that liking a Facebook page of a director doesn't mean that they're friends with you and receptive towards you writing screenplays for him just because he's not massively famous or well known nowadays. His delusion that he'd make a screenplay good enough for somebody who used to be a director to use isn't much different from his delusions that everybody would jump at the chance to read Alphaboy because it's so perfect.

Connor does tend to go around in circles a hell of a lot, which I know is obvious to anybody who's read even a portion of this five hundred page thread. He's even still using the same old excuses for not getting anything done, primarily his one class taking over his life and having to help his grandma with her shopping.

I guess for that reason I find it hard to have any sort of sustained interest in him anymore. Or perhaps it's because ever since he told me he had fantasies about putting mini cameras in Molly Ringwald's button that I've lost my appetite in him.
 
Maybe alphaboy's weakness can be how at night he is kept up with homoerotic thoughts and the villain can exploit that for a hot makeout scene
Or much like his creator, Alpha boy has an overactive libido and compulsively masturbates furiously whenever he thinks about belly buttons.
 
Connor doesn't make money off his eccentricities like other lolcows do (Like Brianna Wu or Dobson). He's an unprofitable lolcow.
That being said, if Connor were to be locked up in a little glass room like a zoo animal I would totally pay to see him. "Stop tapping the glass you gutless motherfuckers!"
 
Back
Top Bottom