Chris Livestream 4/16/2016 - Chris

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So, let me get this straight. The job I'm applying for is to cut up amiibos and glue them back together and repaint them. It's okay if I do a sloppy job and it looks like a 5 year old did it. If the glue doesn't hold and a piece falls off, that's fine as long as I include a note telling the customer to glue it back on. If I have bills to pay, I can spend all the money on that, and finish the amiibos later. Oh, and I get to go to free sex parties.

Sounds like a dream job. Where do I sign up?
 
So, let me get this straight. The job I'm applying for is to cut up amiibos and glue them back together and repaint them. It's okay if I do a sloppy job and it looks like a 5 year old did it. If the glue doesn't hold and a piece falls off, that's fine as long as I include a note telling the customer to glue it back on. If I have bills to pay, I can spend all the money on that, and finish the amiibos later. Oh, and I get to go to free sex parties.

Sounds like a dream job. Where do I sign up?

No, that's only when Chris makes them. You must make yours perfect, or he will refuse to put them on the site, netting you 25% of $0 profit until you fix the amiibo up to his expected standard.
 
Considering how many times he's dealt with jerkops and other authority figures over him solicitating with his attraction sign, it's a wonder he keeps insisting on doing this sort of stuff. Perhaps the fact that he's posting a video instead of going out with a sign in public clouds his judgement and makes him think that this sort of stuff is more acceptable in video form.

Of course, this is also in spite of the fact that many of his videos attract an inordinate number o trolls.

Although, if he were to hire/interview a female employee and come on to her in an inappropriate manner, he'll be in for a rude, saga-worthy awakening.
Chris does not tend to learn general lessons. He only learns incredibly specific ones. If he gets into a conflict with a manager for using an attraction sign, he might learn not to use the attraction sign in that location. He isn't going to apply that to using the attraction sign in general. Let alone other techniques for passive solicitation for sweethearts.
 
Why doesnt Chris take the Tugboat, go to a Brothel, and have a Sex Party that way?

Oh right, he wants it to take place in the stinky, dusty, confides of his unkepmt house with tall, tall grass and dumpy cars hiding the ugly 14BLC, and to fuck the fuckmommas with the Sonic Totem watching the party go down.

You know, instead of having the Sex Party in the lushious-looking brothel.
 
Why doesnt Chris take the Tugboat, go to a Brothel, and have a Sex Party that way?

Oh right, he wants it to take place in the stinky, dusty, confides of his unkepmt house with tall, tall grass and dumpy cars hiding the ugly 14BLC, and to fuck the fuckmommas with the Sonic Totem watching the party go down.

You know, instead of having the Sex Party in the lushious-looking brothel.

Chris is harboring under the delusion that he's a desirable belly dancin' lesbian with D-cups. So why should he pay for sex when it should be freely available? surely no woman can resist when he can go "anyway you desire".

But joking aside, I don't think Chris found paying for sex all that enjoyable or he would do it all the time. I think he wants more of the mollycoddling. He'd probably like it more if he took them on a "date" before fucking them. Pity Bob died because it would be hilarious to see him sitting in on Tom-girl Chris playing footsy with some crusty hooker in McDonald's.
 
But joking aside, I don't think Chris found paying for sex all that enjoyable or he would do it all the time. I think he wants more of the mollycoddling.
Like anyone else who has sex just because they have to have sex. Turns out the physical act is kind of empty when you're basing your whole identity on it.
 
Like anyone else who has sex just because they have to have sex. Turns out the physical act is kind of empty when you're basing your whole identity on it.

Well any of us who have had one night stands can confirm sure it sounds great when your drunk and horny but when you wake up in the morning with a stranger it feels dirty and cheap (especially so if you had to pay for it....not that I'd know..just guessing ). Sex with someone you love is something you can't put a price on
 
Well any of us who have had one night stands can confirm sure it sounds great when your drunk and horny but when you wake up in the morning with a stranger it feels dirty and cheap (especially so if you had to pay for it....not that I'd know..just guessing ). Sex with someone you love is something you can't put a price on
Your guess is pretty much on the ball.

I mean, bar hook ups are fine if that's what you know you want. But if you want someone to love you don't ever think sex alone is a substitute.
 
Don't prostitutes not even let you kiss them and shit or was that just in pretty woman lol and I remember his hooker story she gave him a blowjob with a condom on...that's just fuckin sad
 
Well any of us who have had one night stands can confirm sure it sounds great when your drunk and horny but when you wake up in the morning with a stranger it feels dirty and cheap

Disagree. It makes me laugh at them.
 
Seeing as Chris never responded to my application, I guess I'll share the sample figurine I made. I wasn't sure if he would like it or not, so I even offered to destroy it if it offended him. Still, no response. I made it in about 10 minutes to keep it on par with the quality he would expect from his own work.
 

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^ Honestly, assuming your time estimate is correct, that looks pretty nice for a 10 minute job and better than any Amiibo Chris has customized.
 
Seeing as Chris never responded to my application, I guess I'll share the sample figurine I made. I wasn't sure if he would like it or not, so I even offered to destroy it if it offended him. Still, no response. I made it in about 10 minutes to keep it on par with the quality he would expect from his own work.
Love those eyes!
 
It could be that you did such a good job on it that it makes Chris depressed that someone's better at it than him. I think he got a kick out of the idea that he was the "master" and had some valuable knowledge to impart to his "apprentice" and, as such, he won't contact anyone he can't "teach".
 
Not sure if anyone has posted this yet but whoever made this Chris announcement edit/parody is fucking BOSS. Love the names inside the stocks roller: coc, diks, tits, anal, borb.....................bwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ha ha ha ha ha.

The VHS'y look is lulz! Must watch.
 
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