UK British News Megathread - aka CWCissey's news thread

https://news.sky.com/story/row-over-new-greggs-vegan-sausage-rolls-heats-up-11597679 (https://archive.ph/5Ba6o)

A heated row has broken out over a move by Britain's largest bakery chain to launch a vegan sausage roll.

The pastry, which is filled with a meat substitute and encased in 96 pastry layers, is available in 950 Greggs stores across the country.

It was promised after 20,000 people signed a petition calling for the snack to be launched to accommodate plant-based diet eaters.


But the vegan sausage roll's launch has been greeted by a mixed reaction: Some consumers welcomed it, while others voiced their objections.

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spread happiness@p4leandp1nk
https://twitter.com/p4leandp1nk/status/1080767496569974785

#VEGANsausageroll thanks Greggs

7
10:07 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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Cook and food poverty campaigner Jack Monroe declared she was "frantically googling to see what time my nearest opens tomorrow morning because I will be outside".

While TV writer Brydie Lee-Kennedy called herself "very pro the Greggs vegan sausage roll because anything that wrenches veganism back from the 'clean eating' wellness folk is a good thing".

One Twitter user wrote that finding vegan sausage rolls missing from a store in Corby had "ruined my morning".

Another said: "My son is allergic to dairy products which means I can't really go to Greggs when he's with me. Now I can. Thank you vegans."

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pg often@pgofton
https://twitter.com/pgofton/status/1080772793774624768

The hype got me like #Greggs #Veganuary

42
10:28 AM - Jan 3, 2019
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TV presenter Piers Morgan led the charge of those outraged by the new roll.

"Nobody was waiting for a vegan bloody sausage, you PC-ravaged clowns," he wrote on Twitter.

Mr Morgan later complained at receiving "howling abuse from vegans", adding: "I get it, you're all hangry. I would be too if I only ate plants and gruel."

Another Twitter user said: "I really struggle to believe that 20,000 vegans are that desperate to eat in a Greggs."

"You don't paint a mustach (sic) on the Mona Lisa and you don't mess with the perfect sausage roll," one quipped.

Journalist Nooruddean Choudry suggested Greggs introduce a halal steak bake to "crank the fume levels right up to 11".

The bakery chain told concerned customers that "change is good" and that there would "always be a classic sausage roll".

It comes on the same day McDonald's launched its first vegetarian "Happy Meal", designed for children.

The new dish comes with a "veggie wrap", instead of the usual chicken or beef option.

It should be noted that Piers Morgan and Greggs share the same PR firm, so I'm thinking this is some serious faux outrage and South Park KKK gambiting here.

 

[Kofi Drinka]

My brother's kids go (extremely reluctantly) to a school that sends out e-mails like this. They make a big fuss about kids not attending for "invalid" yet "understandable" reasons, while refusing to address the biggest reason for their non-attendance is absolute terror over the fact that the school refuses to do anything about a dozen kids literally tearing the place apart every day.

Typical Anarcho Tyranny shit. Glad Restore called it what it is.

The BAFTA stuff has me laughing at the moment. All the "empathetic" left dog piling tourettes man. I watched his old stuff and found it funny and informative. You felt for the kid and even for Johnny at times. I'm not one to get teary eyed over documentaries but they're extremely well made. The fact that all the NIGGERS and faggots don't understand tourettes and can't understand he is disabled shows the real "empathy" on the left.

I'm not going to claim I have the most empathy in the world (RIP Salsa and the midget avatars) but tourettes is infamous and funny. Putting it in the victim olympics is stupid. He's just going to shout nigger at you if you control him and then what? He'll shout it again if you hit him. He's going to become an infinite nigger machine. He's unstoppable.

I do hope that this means I can take him out of school during term time for a cheap holiday, on the basis that he had, what was it again, Emotionally Based School Non-Attendance. They wouldn't fine me for that would they? It'd seem awfully judgemental. I was just trying to cheer him up!

He has the sad brain. We need to spend a week in a caravan in Wales to cheer him up.

 

[Overly Serious]

The BAFTA stuff has me laughing at the moment. All the "empathetic" left dog piling tourettes man. I watched his old stuff and found it funny and informative. You felt for the kid and even for Johnny at times. I'm not one to get teary eyed over documentaries but they're extremely well made. The fact that all the NIGGERS and faggots don't understand tourettes and can't understand he is disabled shows the real "empathy" on the left.

If the poor guy had just managed to force out a "My..." before his utterance, he might have gotten away with it.

 

[Otterly]

Tbf every time I read people's posts I am imagining that their avatar is speaking to me. Idc you do sound like how I imagine that woman would sound. Otterly does indeed look like a real otter in a lab coat. Salsa does sound like warwick davis. I have to give you all different voices like a primary teacher reading a book for the class. All I'm saying is kofi drinker's avatar is a black man. So.

What do you do when people change their avatars? Does it provoke an existential crisis?

 

[Kofi Drinka]

If the poor guy had just managed to force out a "My..." before his utterance, he might have gotten away with it.

I think it's funny they think nigga is a different word to nigger. It's not, it's just their chimp lips can't pronounce things correctly so Ask because Axe. Er because Ah. So Nigger is said Niggah. But chimps gonna chimp

What do you do when people change their avatars? Does it provoke an existential crisis?

I assume they're a new person. I can never remember usernames.

 

[Heinrich Maneuver]

Bangladesh Court Orders Interpol Red Notice for Tulip Siddiq

Guido can reveal that according to reports circulating in Bangladesh a court in Dhaka has today ordered an Interpol Red Notice for the arrest of Tulip Siddiq MP. Siddiq has been convicted multiple times in absentia of corruption in the acquisition of property…

Siddiq has always denied all allegations against her. Dhaka Metropolitan Senior Special Judge Md. Sabbir Faiz issued the order after a request was filed by the Bangladesh Anti-Corruption Commission. The ACC alleges that Siddiq is destroying evidence relating to her case…

There are currently 6,458 live public Interpol Red Notices, whose purpose is to notify police forces across the globe about internationally wanted fugitives and request that they are arrested pending extradition. Any extradition processes are in the hands of Shabana Mahmood…

I wonder what Mr International Law will do about this then!

 

[Comfort Cumfart]

So how fucking castrated britbongs are that these finds haven't sent people on the streets to find and hang these paki scum?

 

[LXXVII Brigade]

I live in Scotland. My choice is either SNP or Labour.

I have never liked tactical voting.

Scottish politics is so fucked you are always going to have to tactical vote. It's either Independence or Union. The problem is that the SNP are a fucking cult. Half of their voters genuinely believe that everything is Westminster's fault and that YES is the only way to fix it. They are so entrenched in Holyrood that the entire Scottish Government bends around them. I'm just glad that their own immigration stance is fucking them over in the long term.
Basing Scottish Nationalism on Civic rather than Ethnic grounds is also fucking retarded. Scotland is separate from England because we're a distinct Ethnic group and we fought time after time to prove that distinction. Letting in boatloads of immigrants is ironically enough just going to turn us into ("Modern") England. So much for the Scottish National Party.

I assume they're a new person. I can never remember usernames.

MiW is looking at this post and taking notes.

 

[teriyakiburns]

So how fucking castrated britbongs are that these finds haven't sent people on the streets to find and hang these paki scum?

I don't know. Why aren't you executing politicians in the street when they're mentioned in the epstein files?

 

[Otterly]

Idc you do sound like how I imagine that woman would sound. Otterly does indeed look like a real otter in a lab coat.

Well, I can confirm I am not an otter, although there are some key similarities, and that @Overly Serious isn’t a woman, nor does his head rotate.
I cannot confirm if @Chunky Salsa is a midget, perhaps he’s been playing the long game and will reveal he is in fact Warwick Davies in the thread he keeps just getting out of having to make.

MiW is looking at this post and taking notes.

It’s usually quite obvious when people come back under a new name. You get used to how people write, I’m sure you chaps have all sorts of textual analysis tools too.

 

[Heinrich Maneuver]

MiW is looking at this post and taking notes.

If any lurkers need a username please call yourself 'Not Made in Wales'.

So how fucking castrated britbongs are that these finds haven't sent people on the streets to find and hang these paki scum?

'Based Sikhs' have been hunting Pakis since they got here, only recent about 200 of them dragged a man out a flat in London for raping a girl. If you look on any young persons 'Brit meme' account, as I've said before, the amount of videos of British lads attacking browns on nights out for harassing white girls have doubled recently.

Absolutely bleak finding out today that the ''nurses'' for disabled/elderly people are having fucking ethnic conflict between themselves including the fucking Muzzie woman refusing to pay hindu ''nurses''. jesus fucking christ i hate these people so much

 

[Otterly]

I do hope that this means I can take him out of school during term time for a cheap holiday, on the basis that he had, what was it again, Emotionally Based School Non-Attendance. They wouldn't fine me for that would they? It'd seem awfully judgemental. I was just trying to cheer him up!

Ahhh well you need to make sure you speak the lingo and couch it in terms they can’t disagree with, then refer back to the policy. Set a little groundwork before the request as well, noting child requires emotional support for whatever. Oh look here’s your recent policy, as per my email of …
These policies are used to bash whomever they want to and let others off Scot free, but if you play your cards right then yeah cheap term time hols!
Taking a well behaved kid out for a week at a non critical time should be allowed, it’s so annoying they make a fuss

 

[Symbol of the Chud]

Every time I see PG Tips and their "new" fucking square teabag it makes me angry.
I can't really explain it.
Somebody has to pay.

 

[The Ghost of Sergei Witte]

So how fucking castrated britbongs are that these finds haven't sent people on the streets to find and hang these paki scum?

So how fucking castrated are Yankoids that their Elites literally say "We are paedophiles and we love raping and killing children" and yet do nothing?

 

[Tom Nook's Gloryhole]

Not gonna lie, I'm loving the chaos of the political spectrum right now. For the past 50+ years we've acted like Labour is far left who will give doleys a billion quid, tax workers at 105% and give every single migrant a Mercedes, and Tories are far right and will bring back hanging, kill the NHS and send doleys to the sulpher mines. It was your God given right to vote against the evil nasty party and make things right.

And then REAL left and right have popped up and the illusion is gone, Labour and the Tories have been exposed as relatively centrists and the electorate is now aware of it. Now if you're a far lefty and want to fight fascism you're going to pick Green over Labour and if you're right wing you're going to vote Reform/Restore over the Tories.

The literal best that Tories and Labour can campaign for is 'more of the same' which, if the economy was booming and public services were fully funded that'd be great, but now neither have any specific reason to exist. Yes, things CAN get worse under a far left/right ideology, but people with nothing to lose aren't going to go "well actually I think Labour need 10 more years"

Notice how I haven't mentioned Lib Dems? They genuinely don't know what they want to be, they acted like they were far left of Labour back in the day despite having some policies to the right of the Tories and then joined forces with the Tories which saw their entire leftist vote disappear forever. They have no ideals, no strategies, they just want to be in power so their MPs can get a nice little wage and hopefully just keep chugging along with a thriving economy so they get another term in power. They offer nothing and in an ideal world I'd have them wiped out before either Labour or the Tories.

 

[LXXVII Brigade]

They offer nothing and in an ideal world I'd have them wiped out before either Labour or the Tories.

They still appeal to one type of voter.

The middle class who feel like having any kind of opinion is a bit too offensive.

 

[The Ghost of Sergei Witte]

They genuinely don't know what they want to be

The way I help people understand the Lib Dems is that they are basically the "Special Needs, Feel Good Party", third arm of the Blairite-Party State

 

[EddyRooney]

The BAFTA stuff has me laughing at the moment. All the "empathetic" left dog piling tourettes man. I watched his old stuff and found it funny and informative. You felt for the kid and even for Johnny at times. I'm not one to get teary eyed over documentaries but they're extremely well made. The fact that all the NIGGERS and faggots don't understand tourettes and can't understand he is disabled shows the real "empathy" on the left.

Le petit tourette ?

So niggers are higher up the pyramid of victimhood than the disabled ?

 

[Cloaca Rimjob]

Every time I see PG Tips and their "new" fucking square teabag it makes me angry.
I can't really explain it.
Somebody has to pay.

still using chimps in their advertising too

 

[EddyRooney]

Ahhh well you need to make sure you speak the lingo and couch it in terms they can’t disagree with, then refer back to the policy. Set a little groundwork before the request as well, noting child requires emotional support for whatever. Oh look here’s your recent policy, as per my email of …
These policies are used to bash whomever they want to and let others off Scot free, but if you play your cards right then yeah cheap term time hols!
Taking a well behaved kid out for a week at a non critical time should be allowed, it’s so annoying they make a fuss

I don't understand all this guff Otts. What's the score here, surely it can't be advisable to flag your kid up as some sort of spacker just to get a cheap holiday ? Won't that shit follow the kidlet throughout the rest of their life, or is this an off the books, informal deal ?
Is it a fine line between not enough spaz and they still have to go to school, too much and they're window licking next to Special Barry on the fun bus for the rest of their lives ? It all sounds a bit subjective and not worth the risk to me.

 

[Otterly]

I don't understand all this guff Otts. What's the score here, surely it can't be advisable to flag your kid up as some sort of spacker just to get a cheap holiday ? Won't that shit follow the kidlet throughout the rest of their life, or is this an off the books, informal deal ?
Is it a fine line between not enough spaz and they still have to go to school, too much and they're window licking next to Special Barry on the fun bus for the rest of their lives ? It all sounds a bit subjective and not worth the risk to me.

You read the policy thoroughly and come up with a short term, non stigmatising reason like the hamster just exploded or something and run with it. This of course should only be done if absolutely needed.
Personally I don’t have any truck with it. I just tell them what will be happening and ignore the screeching, I’ve found that to be a fairly effective way of going through life - you just act like the thing is absolutely going to happen and the paperpusher opposite you is terribly unreasonable and you smile a lot as you refuse to comply. Play clown world by its own rules.
Got me through Covid anyway,
Little Timmy was much restored by the affordable week in corfu, and will not need any follow up thank you, what a lovely kind policy you have, I mentioned it to all the school gate mums. (Policy quietly disappears.)
If society is going to make me play by absurdities, I’m going to show them who has rhe Olympic gold for loopholery