💼 Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

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When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%

  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%

  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 17 1.1%

  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.2%

  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.4%

  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 2.8%

  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 16.6%

  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 252 16.2%

  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 902 58.0%
  • Total voters
    1,556
He thinks that because he thinks China Palace Buffet is the only place he eats asian food and he thinks it's legitimate. They dont have half racks of ribs at the buffet there so obviously asians dont understand barbeque. He probably thinks sushi is a Chinese dish since they have it there. You could feed him green curry or something and tell him it's Thai and he would be like "No, asians dont eat curry, this is Indian food."
 
Is macaroni keto?
Jack's secret ingredient is "Pepper flakes" in his pasta. What a new idea.
The "strange" item in the mac and cheese is yellow mustard. Anybody who's ever made mac and cheese from scratch before knows that mustard (usually powder, but basically same thing) is almost as common an ingredient as cheese.
"This is... the cherry on the cake." Cherry on a cake?? Who puts cherries on a cake? That cake is a lie.

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Grating his own cheese! I'm actually impressed!
Cook the macaroni til it's "All Dentay" - Jack, true authentic Italian.

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I'm sorry, I don't own a smoker... Is this what it's supposed to fucking look like? What the fuck it looks like SoCal.

Jack's full review: You guys MUST do crab meat. That's what makes this a homerun. Other than macaroni and cheese, that's what this tastes like. With the crab meat and the smoky flavor, it's a homerun.
So basically all he tells us is that the Smoked Crab Mac & Cheese tastes like macaroni and cheese with crabmeat and smoky flavor. Thanks Jack.
 
for someone who grew up in an area as diverse in people (and food) as southern california jack sure is an uncultured piece of shit. he fits in perfectly in TN
 
Aaway said:
for someone who grew up in an area as diverse in people (and food) as southern california jack sure is an uncultured piece of shit. he fits in perfectly in TN
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I always forget that Jack isn't an authentic Southern redneck. He's assimilated flawlessly into the culture of dipshit Evangelical redneck boomers who don't know shit about shit.
 
Slimy Time said:
Also, wtf is this idiot talking about with Asians having no palate for BBQ? Isn't Korean and Japanese BBQ a big thing? It's probably this idiot's fucked up palate and his lust for salmonella that makes him think this. Not caked in sugar or butter? Their palates must be shit.
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He thinks teriyaki style BBQ is inferior because it means more rice and less meat he can hork down with all the greed of a pig. That and this fuck needs either a shit ton of garlic or a boatload of spices to even taste anything anymore due to his fucked diet and palate.
ScrappyLobsterchu said:
I love how in Jack's head putting butter, garlic, and clams in a pan and waiting a minute is very hard.
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When you have a cannibal ghost screaming to eat your family every second of the day, it must be very hard to wait a minute for food. I mean look at how fatty compensates by overheating everything so he can pretend the charred outside raw inside shit he choke-licks down is "cooked".
Charlie Delicious said:
Char siu called. Looks like a Chinese number.

What ignorant suburban trash you are, Jack.


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Sprinkling food dust on meat is truly an art form, guise
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Dry rub is more convenient, hence why Jack picked it. I tend to use them myself too, but then again I tend to bake or jacket my stuff. But wet rubs are extremely useful because you can convert them easily to marinades. It is also very useful in smoking and grilling where it loses moisture to protect what it covers. This is especially useful for dryer meats.

And on the macaroni, let me cleanse the palate:
 
Xochi said:
I always forget that Jack isn't an authentic Southern redneck. He's assimilated flawlessly into the culture of dipshit Evangelical redneck boomers who don't know shit about shit.
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it helped that he already had a head start on the "not knowing shit about shit" part
 
Aaway said:
for someone who grew up in an area as diverse in people (and food) as southern california jack sure is an uncultured piece of shit. he fits in perfectly in TN
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Hell no he doesn't. Between Nashville, Knoxville, Memphis and the internet, this chubby fuck has absolutely no excuse to have this limited a palate by virtue of location alone.
 
Oh, so he's getting ready to cook turkey again. I remember his turkey last year looked like either a mineral or a disgusting dump by a sick big animal.
 
AnOminous said:
How? I just googled it and it says they're spicy, hot, smoky and delicious, which is absolutely nothing like anything Jack does.
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For the most part that is Jack (delicious being one thing, but in his hand that would be terrible).
He throws (cajun) seasoning onto everything, which isn't far off what Xinjiang skewers are. Basically you're tasting the (chilli) seasoning and some charred fat. The only difference is it is cooked, but good places will give you your own grill to do it (raw)

Never said it would be competent. But it fits his basic palate of over seasoning ÷ charred fat
 
Aaway said:
i wonder if his inability to walk long distances is because of his stroke or diabetes. he mentioned earlier this year that he was suffering from pain in his legs and could only walk a short distance before the pain became too much for him to handle

hence why he's been using motorized carts to get around stores
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If your legs would have to carry estimated 400 lbs your legs would hurt too. It's not just his stroke or the possible beetus, it's the combination of his stroke, his possible beetus and his fucking lazyness.
ScrappyLobsterchu said:
I love how in Jack's head putting butter, garlic, and clams in a pan and waiting a minute is very hard.
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For Jack surely it's hard, just think about all the stuff he could shove down his throat in a minute.
 
Raindrop3000 said:
Hahaha its hilarious. I'm living in Tokyo and I'm dating a Korean; I eat KBBQ, Japanese BBQ/Yakitori and a lot of chinese BBQ meat; in fact I think a lot more than I ever did in the UK. As far as I'm aware all asian cultures eat a lot of meat grilled over a flame or charcoal
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Grilling shit is literally the oldest form of cooking the world over. It's like the wheel, except africa was able to figure out grilling food, unlike the wheel.
 
Marissa Moira said:
Grilling shit is literally the oldest form of cooking the world over. It's like the wheel, except africa was able to figure out grilling food, unlike the wheel.
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I guess Jack feels that Southern BBQ is the pinnacle and nothing comes close.

P.S Don't know if this is at all interesting but could this be Jack?

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Steam Community :: jakatak

My fiance plays Sims 3. Not me.
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