Captain Marvel - Literally, from "her" to "hero"

[KillThemCrackasBabies]

...Bruh, we gotta talk. But yeah, that sounds about right from what I was expecting from this movie despite all the marketing controversy.

I never claimed to be patrician my man.

 

[RockVolnutt]

Caught a 7pm showing with friends, liked it though like guy above me I really liked all the DC shit too so take my opinions for what they're worth. Shooting off thoughts as I recall them, AMA if you're curious about shit I don't mention.

Spoiler

- the "tear jerking" Stan Lee tribute is literally fucking nothing, and I groaned after seeing it and realizing motherfuckers said they "cried" upon seeing it. It's pictures of him as the logo runs.

- The beginning was fine, and I have no idea what people are talking about when they say it "takes a while to get going" or "starts off weird", it plops you right into action which I liked

- Larsons "bad acting" is a deliberate thing to try and harp on the "brainwashing" shit as opposed to her being a shit actress, however because she is "brainwashed" throughout most of the movie, that is her delivery throughout almost every scene with her doing anything besides bantering with Sam Jackson

- the stuff with just the two of them is really good and takes up a decent amount of time, not nearly enough

- I can only liken "Brainwashed Carol" to Ashly Burch doing a John Cena promo

- way more Thor 1 than Captain America, which was probably to be expected ebcause of the space themes but still

- the 90's shit gets tiring after a while, they don't overdo it but at a point the novelty loses all charm. Except the scene with Nirvana which I loved.

- she is not OP at all and I have no idea where the fuck the idea that "she'll beat Thanos!" is coming from, she at the absolute best is first movie Thor-tier
and only modestly beats up a team of grunts. At the end she smacks up a bunch of space ships, but it's not done over-the-top, she literally just flies through the fuckers. Nothing major. She's more or less Iron Man at his peak, with the suit being made out of her, that's it

- A lot of the humor is too Joss Whedon era "quirky" and way too much of it really soured it at times when I was getting into it

- the "girl power!" shit is, again, overblown. A montage of her falling down "doing boys stuff", a joke about cockpits which I laughed at, one cringe-inducing scene where a biker says "Smile, baby!" but is over as soon as it starts, and the end when she's getting up during her, to make the comparison again, John Cena NEVER GIVE UP! power-up scene heavily implies, but does not actually say, 'Grls are stonk too guis!'. Noticible what they were going for, but could have been way worse.

That's all I can remember. I'd compare it to a slightly less good Aquaman? The bones of it are as good as any Marvel movie, but a ton of the humor falls flat on its face and after Russo Brothers and Taika Waititi doing humor properly, to go back to "quirky" jokes as often as they do is an undeniable step backwards that I can't ignore.

I give it 2 and a half Bugman Smiles, leaning more towards 3 but that humor just missed way too often at a time when Marvel had been hitting a certain style out of the park.

View attachment 688107

Did Mar-Vell have a notable part of the movie? I have a feeling that they screwed him over which is a shame as his death was a big thing. Did they try to mimic Carol's original comic origin, the Car-Ell shit the comics recently retcon'd in with her mom being a Kree, or did they just make their own without following either?

 

[StarkRavingMad]

I watched it today too. It’s one of these movies that normies really love. I’m a cynical bitch so I got bored in the first twenty minutes. Not even Jude Law or that green funny alien could save me from that bad Marvel movie.
Why can’t we go back to Avengers (2012)?

Just putting this out there: When I went to see the Lego Movie 2, I absolutely hated every second of it. I was miserable the entire time. When the movie ended, the audience applauded. I just assumed to myself that I was in the vast minority and that the movie was going to smash it at the box office. Obviously, that was not the case. The movie underperformed at the box office big time.

Audience reactions don't necessarily mean a thing about the movie's financial success, especially on opening night.

That said, I do fully expect for this movie to be frontloaded on opening weekend. It's a Marvel movie, and a lot of "normies" just don't know about the "culture war," lol. There is zero chance that this movie will bomb (and anyone who thought it would bomb is delusional). I think there's a big chance it will perform under expectations, though. The second weekend, I think, is going to be the most telling weekend a la The Last Jedi.

 

[KillThemCrackasBabies]

Did Mar-Vell have a notable part of the movie? I have a feeling that they screwed him over which is a shame as his death was a big thing. Did they try to mimic Carol's original comic origin, the Car-Ell shit the comics recently retcon'd in with her mom being a Kree, or did they just make their own?

I'm not super familair with OG Captain Marvel lore but;

Spoiler

the Mar-Vell in this is a woman who was trying to help the Skrull (revealed midway through to be refugees getting the shit beaten out of them by Kree wherever they go for next to no reason) make what is essentially a 'warp speed engine' to escape. When she attempts to test it in a fighter jet, Carol is chosen (iirc at random?) to fly the jet so she can fuck with it. Yon-Rogg, who wants Skrulls ovened, finds them, shoots them down, shoots Mar-Vell in the head, and tries to steal the engine. Carol shoots the engine and absorbs it power in a manner I can only compare to Hulk getting shot with a gamma ray, and that wipes her brain. Knowing Carol is now as powerful as the engine he wanted, Yon-Rogg more or less just says "Fuck it, I'll just use her instead of the engine, same difference. load 'er up fellas". I wasn't too keen on that part but again more run of the mill Marvel Phase 1 shit than anything like over the top retarded.

Oh and also

Spoiler

Ronin is like barely fucking in it, I think his total screentime amounts to maybe a full minute, if that.

 

[ZehnBoat]

i'm late to this but whatever

KF needs a 'vomit' icon. Jesus Fucking Christ. Even for Marvel/Disney this is amazingly crass.

i love the few shills running in and going
"BUT STAN ADVERTISED MOVIES WHEN HE WAS ALIVE SO ITS OKAY!"

excuse me? how dumb are these guys that they don't see the difference between someone alive talking about a movie they want you to see, and a soulless corp using the corpse of someone to advertise a movie?

i hope when these shills die, someone takes their accounts and advertises for the KKK or something on their accounts.

 

[RockVolnutt]

I'm not super familair with OG Captain Marvel lore but;

Spoiler

the Mar-Vell in this is a woman who was trying to help the Skrull (revealed midway through to be refugees getting the shit beaten out of them by Kree wherever they go for next to no reason) make what is essentially a 'warp speed engine' to escape. When she attempts to test it in a fighter jet, Carol is chosen (iirc at random?) to fly the jet so she can fuck with it. Yon-Rogg, who wants Skrulls ovened, finds them, shoots them down, shoots Mar-Vell in the head, and tries to steal the engine. Carol shoots the engine and absorbs it power in a manner I can only compare to Hulk getting shot with a gamma ray, and that wipes her brain. Knowing Carol is now as powerful as the engine he wanted, Yon-Rogg more or less just says "Fuck it, I'll just use her instead of the engine, same difference. load 'er up fellas". I wasn't too keen on that part but again more run of the mill Marvel Phase 1 shit than anything like over the top exceptional.

Ah, I see. They really did just scrap almost everything about the character for the MCU....even the stuff that worked. I'm not a fan of that but it is interesting to see MCU Carol as an original creation.

I'm not going to jump to the conclusion that it sounds like they hated that her origin was tied to a man but it kinda sounds like it.

R.I.P classic Mar-Vell

 

[StarkRavingMad]

Yeah, it's downright ghoulish to use Stan Lee's social media accounts to promote a fucking movie. Absolutely ghoulish.

Marvel and Disney gave NO SHITS about Stan Lee during his downright tragic final year of life. Now, they're using his old, PERSONAL social media accounts to shill shit.

Fuck you, Marvel and Disney. Fuuuuck you.

 

[cuddle striker]

Goddamn she just coldcocked an elderly woman.

why I'm going to see it

 

[KingofNothing]

I'm not super familair with OG Captain Marvel lore but;

Spoiler

the Mar-Vell in this is a woman who was trying to help the Skrull (revealed midway through to be refugees getting the shit beaten out of them by Kree wherever they go for next to no reason) make what is essentially a 'warp speed engine' to escape. When she attempts to test it in a fighter jet, Carol is chosen (iirc at random?) to fly the jet so she can fuck with it. Yon-Rogg, who wants Skrulls ovened, finds them, shoots them down, shoots Mar-Vell in the head, and tries to steal the engine. Carol shoots the engine and absorbs it power in a manner I can only compare to Hulk getting shot with a gamma ray, and that wipes her brain. Knowing Carol is now as powerful as the engine he wanted, Yon-Rogg more or less just says "Fuck it, I'll just use her instead of the engine, same difference. load 'er up fellas". I wasn't too keen on that part but again more run of the mill Marvel Phase 1 shit than anything like over the top exceptional.

Oh and also

Spoiler

Ronin is like barely fucking in it, I think his total screentime amounts to maybe a full minute, if that.

Ok that second spoiler is awful and I'm actually upset by it

Spoiler

One minute is way too fucking short for a character they mentioned was gonna be in it ages ago. This was their chance to give Ronin a bit more depth too. Plus Ronin is strong enough that guys like the Fantastic Four have to team up to deal with him effectively, so we could have gotten a good fight out of that

 

[KillThemCrackasBabies]

Ok that second spoiler is awful and I'm actually upset by it

Spoiler

One minute is way too fucking short for a character they mentioned was gonna be in it ages ago. This was their chance to give Ronin a bit more depth too. Plus Ronin is strong enough that guys like the Fantastic Four have to team up to deal with him effectively, so we could have gotten a good fight out of that

Worst part? More than half of it is;

Spoiler

him in those Star Wars type hologram thing. His face-time on screen is, literally, maaaaybe 30 seconds.

 

[KingofNothing]

Worst part? More than half of it is;

Spoiler

him in those Star Wars type hologram thing. His face-time on screen is, literally, maaaaybe 30 seconds.

 

[Somar]

Oh and also

Spoiler

Ronin is like barely fucking in it, I think his total screentime amounts to maybe a full minute, if that.

Spoiler

I get Marvel probably doesn't want to have Carol fuck up Ronin too much since he isn't supposed to die for another 19 years, but I can't believe there's no way they couldn't find a way to have at least a 2 minute fight that didn't end in Carol killing Ronin.

 

[Positron]

Here is a Hong Kong critic who is very pozzed and has been a diehard fan of Larsen. This is what he says about the film.

"For the most part, Larson is up for the superheroic challenge, kicking some serious alien male butt and injecting both humour and a warm smile along the way."​

​

"It’s about on par with THOR."​

​

The CAPTAIN MARVEL online trolls were out in full force a few weeks ago even before they had a chance to see the film and the vitriol was so intense — not to mention absurd — that it caused Rotten Tomatoes to change how films are rated on its site. (Users are now barred from leaving comments or rating a film until it is released in cinemas.) Now that the film is out though, you can be sure that these insecure Mom’s basement dwellers will be back with a vengeance. This time, however, their criticism of the film may be somewhat justified.

CAPTAIN MARVEL is the first film from the Marvel Cinematic Universe to star a female superhero and it’s the first MCU film to be released following the death of Stan Lee last November at age 95. To honour the characters’ creator, CAPTAIN MARVEL opens with a respectful and classy montage of Lee’s many cameo appearances in the MCU films superimposed over the background of its corporate logo. The story then begins on the planet Hala where Vers (Brie Larson, KONG: SKULL ISLAND; THE GLASS CASTLE; ROOM; SHORT TERM 12; THE SPECTACULAR NOW; DON JON), which rhymes with “years”, is sparring with her mentor and fellow blue-blooded Kree, Yon-Rogg (Jude Law, FANTASTIC BEASTS: THE CRIMES OF GRINDELWALD; KING ARTHUR: LEGEND OF THE SWORD; SPY). Vers has a bit of a problem though. She can’t remember her life before she came to Hala six years earlier though she keeps getting flashback memories of it. That all changes when she is captured by Talos (Ben Mendelsohn, DARKEST HOUR; SLOW WEST; EXODUS:GODS AND KINGS; STARRED UP), the leader of an enemy alien race, the shape-shifting Skrull, who probes her mind looking for information on the Supreme Intelligence, an organic, artificial intelligence that rules over the Kree. Every Kree sees the Supreme Intelligence as someone from their past. For Vers, she sees a woman (played by Annette Bening, FILM STARS DON’T DIE IN LIVERPOOL) but she can’t place who she is. Vers eventually escapes from the Skrull and flies to the planet C-53, which we call Earth, where she meets Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson, GLASS; LIFE ITSELF; KONG: SKULL ISLAND; THE HITMAN’S BODYGUARD; THE LEGEND OF TARZAN; THE HATEFUL EIGHT), who is an agent for S.H.I.E.L.D. With the Skrull and the Kree is hot pursuit, Vers and Fury try to piece together Vers’ past and save the good guys in the nick of time. In the process, they’re helped by an orange cat named Goose (played by four very well trained cats) and Maria Rambeau (Lashana Lynch), a test pilot Vers’ once knew.

Following the runaway success of rival franchise DCEU’s WONDER WOMAN two years ago, Marvel was under pressure to make CAPTAIN MARVEL just as good if not better. (Okay, it probably wasn’t huge pressure given that MCU’s cumulative box office take is almost four times that of DCEU’s.) For the most part, Larson is up for the superheroic challenge, kicking some serious alien male butt and injecting both humour and a warm smile along the way. CAPTAIN MARVEL is no WONDER WOMAN though, as the actress is let down by a rather mundane script that borrows surprisingly heavily from the STAR WARS and INDIANA JONES films. I mean, doesn’t Ronan the Accuser (Lee Pace, GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY; THE PROGRAM) look like Emperor Palpatine holding Thor’s Mjölnir? Speaking of Ronan, he’s not the only character from this story we’ve seen before. Djimon Hounsou (GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY; KING ARTHUR: LEGEND OF THE SWORD; THE LEGEND OF TARZAN) also reprises his role as Kree mercenary, Korath. And, of course, Samuel L. Jackson is back after appearing in eight MCU films so far, four of them being cameos and three of those four being uncredited. This time, though, he looks much younger — and has two functioning eyes — because it’s sometime in the 1990s and the CGI wizards at Marvel Studios used de-aging technology on him. (Did Jackson ever look that good?) About that time frame, the film does have some amusing scenes, mostly revolving around the use of Windows 3.1-era technology, although there are no Blue Screens of Death to be seen. (Kids, if you don’t know what that is, google it.)

Lackluster screenplay aside, the film’s action scenes aren’t very impressive either. The obligatory chase scene, which is somewhat reminiscent of the one in FRENCH CONNECTION, really could have benefited from a heavy shot of adrenaline. We saw much better in BLACK PANTHER and even in SPIDER-MAN: HOMECOMING. The other action scenes don’t fare much better and it could be that because Captain Marvel is so powerful, her enemies are really no match for her. We need to see her square off against a more formidable villain. Fortunately, we only have to wait seven weeks for that to happen with the release of AVENGERS: ENDGAME on April 24.

As far as female empowerment films go, CAPTAIN MARVEL is pretty good, though I still think we’ll see more little girls dressing up as Wonder Wonder than as Captain Marvel come Hallowe’en. (Even WW’s outfit is more interesting.) As far as origin stories go though, CAPTAIN MARVEL is just okay. It’s about on par with THOR, which means it will make about a half a billion dollars at the box office.

 

[madethistocomment]

Spoiler: salt

....I am legit mad at them for just making Mar-Vell a complete fucking rando lady. What a disservice to the original character.

 

[Cuatro Vaginas]

In the end, the MCU isn't any better than Snyder when it comes to characterizations, normies always praise how comic book accurate are the costumes but what about comic book accurate characterizations?

Places like comicbookmovie.com are the worst when it comes to that. Full of lolcows btw.

 

[StarkRavingMad]

Spoiler: Mad On the Internet

The more I think about it, the movie legit "Last Jedi's" itself with the lame revelation about the Skrulls.

For months, people have been speculating about the Skrulls, and about how they will affect the future films ... Especially Endgame. Turns out that they're nothing to worry about! Not a threat at all! This is 100000000x worse than the Mandarin in Iron Man 3.

Yeah, fuck this movie.

 

[Godzilla@1989]

Places like comicbookmovie.com are the worst when it comes to that. Full of lolcows btw.

Dude, this sites are ultra fucking biased in favor of the MCU. Like today I heard that Bob Iger confirmed during a shareholders call that Disney will continue using the Fox film units and make films under them and all they have been doing is “X-Men!” “X-Men!”

Spoiler: Mad On the Internet

The movie legit "Last Jedi's" itself with the lame revelation about the Skrulls.

For months, people have been speculating about the Skrulls, and about how they will affect the future films ... Especially Endgame. Turns out that they're nothing to worry about! Not a threat at all! This is 100000000x worse than the Mandarin in Iron Man 3.

Yeah, fuck this movie.

I’m starting to worry if Feige fucked up in the end when he was plotting the Thanos Saga (Iron Man 1-Endgame).

 

[The Great Chandler]

At the end of the day, the Monsterverse might look like the bigger winner than the MCU, despite not churning out movies in a yearly basis and at least knowing when to end.

 

[RockVolnutt]

Spoiler: Mad On the Internet

The movie legit "Last Jedi's" itself with the lame revelation about the Skrulls.

For months, people have been speculating about the Skrulls, and about how they will affect the future films ... Especially Endgame. Turns out that they're nothing to worry about! Not a threat at all! This is 100000000x worse than the Mandarin in Iron Man 3.

Yeah, fuck this movie.

Spoiler: To be fair, I don't think people would like if you adapted Secret Invasion. Very unwoke for 2008.

Literally called a "Jihad" and happens because of some religious belief that the Earth shall belong to themselves.

 

[damian]

Spoiler

I just wanted to fit in.