🍗 Deathfat Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[Programmer Socks]

Fuuuuuckkkk the size of her arm in that last pic! Her proportions are truly outlandishly monstrous. Gargantuan doesn't even begin to describe the circumference of even her arms. I wouldn't be able to stop staring at her in person, everything about her is a freakshow of ridiculousness. With her repellent personality and piss-boilingly annoying voice, she really is a package from hell. The tattoos make her look even more slovenly and trashy. What a completely classless cunt.

I wonder if Hooves will be inspiration to the other fats on this tour to get in control of their health and lose some weight. Being around her you'd do anything to not end up like her. So in some ways she is an ambassador, but not why she thinks.

 

[Blue Banana]

Fuuuuuckkkk the size of her arm in that last pic! Her proportions are truly outlandishly monstrous. Gargantuan doesn't even begin to describe the circumference of even her arms. I wouldn't be able to stop staring at her in person, everything about her is a freakshow of ridiculousness. With her repellent personality and piss-boilingly annoying voice, she really is a package from hell. The tattoos make her look even more slovenly and trashy. What a completely classless cunt.

Her proportions are wild. This looks like two different people's arms put together:


The tattoo real estate is astonishing, it amazes me that the huge tattoo on the front of her calf is fully visible without wrapping around her shin at all.

I wonder if Hooves will be inspiration to the other fats on this tour to get in control of their health and lose some weight. Being around her you'd do anything to not end up like her. So in some ways she is an ambassador, but not why she thinks.

I think it could also go the other way, in that having Tess around as the fat friend could make it easier for someone to continue to delude themselves into thinking it's not that bad. I could see someone being proud of themselves for simply participating all of the activities, especially when Tess is sitting alone crying and is too scared to jump like six inches into clear water.

 

[unwieldy_object]

Wait, Tess knows this song?
https://youtube.com/watch?v=rpdG-wxZMt4

I'm curious, what does the song you posted have to do with the video she posted?

 

[Trombonista]

I'm curious, what does the song you posted have to do with the video she posted?

This image @NoReturn shared lists that song:

Could be a TikTok error, though.

 

[unwieldy_object]

This image @NoReturn shared lists that song:
View attachment 6271303
Could be a TikTok error, though.

Hmm, okay I thought they were two different songs because of the difference in title and they don't sound the same but now I get it.

And btw, Tess has no clue about anything about the song, it's a trending audio right now.

 

[blue gopher snakes]

I wanna see the secret video someone took of Tess climbing back out of the water.

She is MASSIVE even in comparison to the other fatties that paid for a fat-friendly vacation. I bet she’s a salty bitch because nobody there can serve as her “well at least I’m not THAT fat” person, meanwhile she is that person for everyone else.

 

[Soup Sammiches]

She posted herself in that baffling swimwear choice outside a church. I don't care if its no longer used as one, which she takes pains to point out, I just can't see that being acceptable to many Christians.

View attachment 6264704

Not really a Christian but that church was put together and carved BY HAND, men spent days fitting and cutting those stones and she just splashes down and ruins it. I'd actually love to see that building live and without a pile of trash in front of it.

 

[Programmer Socks]

Her proportions are wild. This looks like two different people's arms put together:
View attachment 6267531

The tattoo real estate is astonishing, it amazes me that the huge tattoo on the front of her calf is fully visible without wrapping around her shin at all.
View attachment 6267558


I think it could also go the other way, in that having Tess around as the fat friend could make it easier for someone to continue to delude themselves into thinking it's not that bad. I could see someone being proud of themselves for simply participating all of the activities, especially when Tess is sitting alone crying and is too scared to jump like six inches into clear water.

My brain cannot parse the image of her upper am that you posted. It's so grossly deformed that it looks like some optical trickery, but that shapeless mass of blubber is her actual arm. At least she will never develop bingo wings when her entire arm is a mass of unidentifiable fat. The elbow joint looks so weird. She is the dictionary definition of Ham Planet now, her face is so round and bloated it looks like it will burst at any second. Her width must nearly match her height by now. It's incredible that she's still breathing.

 

[Stupid Sexy Flanders]

It's so grossly deformed that it looks like some optical trickery, but that shapeless mass of blubber is her actual arm.

I just assume her body just doesn't really know where to store fat these days as she keeps gaining weight. I guess she's lucky if she doesn't end up with a Tammy Slaton situation where her body will just start storing fat in her forehead because it no longer knows where else to put it.

 

[Constellationzero]

Just gonna leave this here.

 

[Amberglow]

Has Tess always been this huge? I remember seeing photos where she seemed kind of like a cute chubby rock a Billy chick but now she’s just an angry large Marge.

 

[multiverse]

Has Tess always been this huge? I remember seeing photos where she seemed kind of like a cute chubby rock a Billy chick but now she’s just an angry large Marge.

Yes. Her older rockabilly photos were always heavily photoshopped to eliminate her bulk, cellulite, and spare chins.

The Big Gain seems to have taken place some time between 2010 and 2012, roughly around the time she moved from Seattle to LA. I did a timeline with old photos a long while back.

 

[Bill Evans 45]

Some new pics

I wish she would stop with the laaayg pop, all it shows is how fucked up her knees are.

 

[Angry New Ager]

Yes. Her older rockabilly photos were always heavily photoshopped to eliminate her bulk, cellulite, and spare chins.

The Big Gain seems to have taken place some time between 2010 and 2012, roughly around the time she moved from Seattle to LA. I did a timeline with old photos a long while back.

She did another Big Gain—the one that sized her out of her 15-minute "modeling" career—while she was married to Nick. She gained a lot even before getting pregnant with Bowie, surprisingly didn't gain (and maybe even lost a little) while pregnant (and never looked pregnant because LOL fat), and resumed gaining post-partum.

After they got booted from their apartment and Nick fucked off back to Oz, Tess made an Insta post about how she'd taken to "comfort eating" to deal with her marriage to an "abusive" partner, and had gained weight. But in the years since, she hasn't lost any of the weight she packed on, and has slowly continued to gain, so clearly, Nick isn't the one to blame.

 

[vanilla_pepsi_head]

Tell me you're not nordic without telling me. Black liquorice is delicious and you can find so many different varieties here and that you judge it by American black liquorice make me feel sad for you.

I knew Nordic countries were big on their black licorice, but rated you informative because I didn't know there were many varieties. I might've even tried a few thanks to a Dutch coworker who loves the stuff but it's such a powerful flavor to me that I likely didn't really pick up on the difference. I don't totally hate it, but wouldn't go out of my way for licorice flavored ice cream either except for sheer novelty.

Lmao Tess would absolutely not have the awareness for it to ever occur to her that thrusting her exposed, heavily corrugated Hindenburg-sized ass out to photograph in front of an ancient temple of worship as a tourist might potentially be seen as tasteless or outright offensive. Guaranteed the tour guide had to explain this and tell her she should clarify the church had been deconsecrated so she didn't make the tour group company look like they let their pet hogs run feral and disrespect their host country like that.

I also found it amusing that the fat trip had ton of extra content on the FAQ that starts with “We are not therapists.” Sounds like people got their feelings hurt on this trip in the past, lmao.

God, it must be exhausting to have such a chip on your shoulder about being fat all the time that you can't even have fun on vacation, because watching people eat smaller portions, a couple of funny looks from locals, or the presence of thinner or more attractive women in your vicinity at any time will fuck you up mentally to the point that you waste half the day crying and trauma dumping on your fuckin' tour guide.

We know Tess is a bad choice as a tour host, but I can't really fault Stellavision if they only comped Tess for the trip and nothing else. Looking at their socials and website, they don't seem to be a big operation. Not that travel agencies need to be, but they also don't seem to be all that popular or they're likely just starting out.

100% they would have loved to rope in Ashley Graham or Paloma Elsesser as a host, but those are A-list models and Stellavision can't afford them. They probably went down the list and saw Tess Holliday languishing at the bottom, willing to host a tour for free tickets and food in between servicing cake Johns. It's likely a win-win. Stellavision gets access to sad fatties who think Tess still matters, and Tess gets to pretend like she's still a jetsetting A-lister for a couple of days before she slinks back to reality.

But yeah, if they did pay Tess on top of the comped trip, they fucked up.

I think it could also go the other way, in that having Tess around as the fat friend could make it easier for someone to continue to delude themselves into thinking it's not that bad. I could see someone being proud of themselves for simply participating all of the activities, especially when Tess is sitting alone crying and is too scared to jump like six inches into clear water.

They hired Tess on purpose I think, though depending on how insufferable her behavior is they may have vastly underestimated what a ball ache it is to wrangle her. I think they wanted to hire the biggest, most corpulent hambeast they could reasonably find to make fat women more comfortable signing up, knowing they won't be the fattest one there. If the fat tour group attracts stares - and they likely will - Tess will absorb most of them because she's not only huge but is also a loud, rude bitch, and has incredibly gaudy and inappropriate fashion sense that would attract attention on its own. She's like a lard ass lightning rod. Naturally it's bad optics to outright say they're hiring someone for this purpose, but Tess is just famous enough that it's plausible they hired her because she's kind of a "name" and not to reassure self-conscious fat women they won't ruin the tour being the fattest and least mobile one there.

 

[Twrx]

Lmao Tess would absolutely not have the awareness for it to ever occur to her that thrusting her exposed, heavily corrugated Hindenburg-sized ass out to photograph in front of an ancient temple of worship as a tourist might potentially be seen as tasteless or outright offensive. Guaranteed the tour guide had to explain this and tell her she should clarify the church had been deconsecrated so she didn't make the tour group company look like they let their pet hogs run feral and disrespect their host country like that.

Not so much lacking awareness, but moreso she doesn't give a shit. She's the main character of the world, beyond reproach.

 

[yousoundlikeanasshole]

I guess Italy wasn't as fun and fancy free as she thought it would be. She'll probably make a video or long ass post crying about it and urge people to boycott the entire country.

 

[FuckDuckSeagull]

I love it that she had to experience life outside of Burgerland. It probably doesn't take much to trigger Tess tho, most likely the mere precense of a normal sized woman eating a normal sized portion of food is enough to make her sad and angry.

 

[Barbarella]

I love black licorice but as an Amerimutt finding the good stuff is hard, so it’s a rare treat.

I can’t wait for her Italians are fatphobic stories. I’d get phobic too if I saw a Godzilla sized woman wearing a black top with white swirls outlining her breasts rushing towards me at the Gelato stand. My heartrate would soar in fear she’d take all the ice cream.

Why does nobody notice Tess and the other fats are “thin phobic?”

 

[My cravat doesn't flutter]

I have never seen pasta wheels anywhere but a kids' menu. Are they just a regular thing in Italy?

Those are certainly all words.

I can report with relief that the fringed diaper was indeed a swimsuit, and not, as we feared, evening wear.

What I wouldn't give to see Mess trip on one of those strings and mash her face on the pavement.

Ironically, the fat version of the tour starts with a slow-pace feminist walking tour,

Just what I want on my expensive getaway vacation: a lecture on feminism!

I guess Italy wasn't as fun and fancy free as she thought it would be. She'll probably make a video or long ass post crying about it and urge people to boycott the entire country.

Do people never check the automate captions? I know she went swimming, but these fellas don't typically hang out in the open water: