Consoomers / Consoomer Culture - Because if it has a recogniseable brand on it, I’d buy it!

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IT'S TIME TO CONSUME.

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This is Lisa Courtney, the record holder for the biggest pokemon collection. Between 2016 and 2021, her collection went from 12,127 items to 21,000.

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Ron Broomfield with 1,600 gnomes. Though to be fair to Ron, who is pictured delightfully in the back dressed as a gnome, he's been working on that for 50 years, so not even remotely as bad as it could be. He consumes the gnomes, but they don't consume him.

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Ta-Bo, who rents a 3 bedroom apartment in Tokyo for his over 100 love dolls. He can fuck each of them 3 times a year if he wants to get through all of them.

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Yvette Dardenne with over 60,000 tin boxes.
 
Sleazy Car Salesman said:
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@Yaks I like Ron, he seems like a decent guy. I'd chill out in the gnome garden with him and have a drink.
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Yeah Ron seems like he has a good sense of humor. 32 gnomes a year is definitely excessive, but there's something charming about him.

For some reason I always have a harder time wrapping my head around sex toy hoards compared to other collections. Like what gets someone started collecting things you shove up your coot coot and/or prune shoot? It's not really something you can display unless you have absolutely zero social skills and don't care. (Which I suspect may be the case here.)
 
Yaks said:
Yeah Ron seems like he has a good sense of humor. 32 gnomes a year is definitely excessive, but there's something charming about him.
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The other thing with an old guy like him is that he (probably) has both children and grandchildren and I can promise you that a number of those were Christmas, birthday, and probably also Father's Day gifts. I think Yvette probably also falls into that category. Although with tins you can usually find a good number of those at estate sales and swapmeets/flea markets for cheap. Every time a grandma dies a Goodwill gets a Jesus picture and a crafts fair gets a biscuit tin.
 
Yaks said:
32 gnomes a year is definitely excessive, but there's something charming about him.
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Once you have a dozen garden gnomes, your family starts giving them to you for Christmas.
Once you have a hundred, or you get a story in the newspaper, strangers start bringing them by.

A humorous collection like this is to some extent memetically self-replicating. Not to say that Ron didn't willingly let the gnomes into his life, but it quickly became bigger than that.



edit: no shame in being beaten by @Sleazy Car Salesman, a fellow gnome scholar
 
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Sleazy Car Salesman said:
The other thing with an old guy like him is that he (probably) has both children and grandchildren and I can promise you that a number of those were Christmas, birthday, and probably also Father's Day gifts. I think Yvette probably also falls into that category. Although with tins you can usually find a good number of those at estate sales and swapmeets/flea markets for cheap. Every time a grandma dies a Goodwill gets a Jesus picture and a crafts fair gets a biscuit tin.
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Aunt Carol said:
Once you have a dozen garden gnomes, your family starts giving them to you for Christmas.
Once you have a hundred, or you get a story in the newspaper, strangers start bringing them by.

A humorous collection like this is to some extent memetically self-replicating. Not to say that Ron didn't willingly let the gnomes into his life, but it quickly became bigger than that.
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Oh yeah for sure, especially with funny shit like gnomes. There was an elderly woman that lived near me growing up that had quite an extensive gnome collection outside of her house. Everyone I knew who saw them absolutely adored seeing them, so I'm sure she got a lot of gifts.

Sad to say that Ron passed away in 2015, with a whopping over 1,800 gnomes.

"Every Wednesday Ron turned into a gnome for the day. He dressed up and went shopping in his local village and for the rest of the day he carried out repairs on broken gnomes, and retouches any faded paintwork. He sadly died in 2015 and was cremated in the gnome outfit he regularly wore."

Did not expect to get emotional over the consoomer thread, but here I am. I'm not crying you are.
 
Yaks said:
Oh yeah for sure, especially with funny shit like gnomes. There was an elderly woman that lived near me growing up that had quite an extensive gnome collection outside of her house. Everyone I knew who saw them absolutely adored seeing them, so I'm sure she got a lot of gifts.

Sad to say that Ron passed away in 2015, with a whopping over 1,800 gnomes.

"Every Wednesday Ron turned into a gnome for the day. He dressed up and went shopping in his local village and for the rest of the day he carried out repairs on broken gnomes, and retouches any faded paintwork. He sadly died in 2015 and was cremated in the gnome outfit he regularly wore."

Did not expect to get emotional over the consoomer thread, but here I am. I'm not crying you are.
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:semperfidelis:
 
Yaks said:
"Every Wednesday Ron turned into a gnome for the day. He dressed up and went shopping in his local village and for the rest of the day he carried out repairs on broken gnomes, and retouches any faded paintwork. He sadly died in 2015 and was cremated in the gnome outfit he regularly wore."
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"On Wednesdays, we wear gnome costumes."

If they didn't seal his ashes into a hollow gnome, I'm going to be upset.
 
Yaks said:
For some reason I always have a harder time wrapping my head around sex toy hoards compared to other collections. Like what gets someone started collecting things you shove up your coot coot and/or prune shoot? It's not really something you can display unless you have absolutely zero social skills and don't care. (Which I suspect may be the case here.)
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Think about if you inherited some of these collections. The Pokemon one would be easy to sell off, since you could look at tags and find out exactly what you have, and exactly how much they go for. The garden gnomes and tins would be a little harder, though feasible to sell in a lot or donate to a museum.

A $10,000 exotic dildo collection is completely different. You'd have to find some deeply disturbed people that would actually want to buy a used dildo. Even people like us, who hang out online and have seen everything, really don't want to deal with those types. Your relative also threw away tons of money on hedonism, and this is all you got to show for it. It's disgusting in a lot of different ways.

I don't know what I'd do if I ended up inheriting a relative's dildo collection. Maybe I'd find where someone I don't like lives and leave a few in front of their door. It's a terrible situation.
 
Pissmaster said:
I don't know what I'd do if I ended up inheriting a relative's dildo collection. Maybe I'd find where someone I don't like lives and leave a few in front of their door. It's a terrible situation.
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I'd buy a couple of tubes of superglue, wait until evening, then head over to where the rich bastards with their Lambos live. Do a little improvised ride pimping.
 
Shig O'nella said:
I'd buy a couple of tubes of superglue, wait until evening, then head over to where the rich bastards with their Lambos live. Do a little improvised ride pimping.
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Fuck that, the Lambo and Ferrari drivers around here never bother anyone. Vandalize city busses.

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Gay Mouth said:
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WE DID IT REDDIT!
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Pretty sure Lego did not do that. It was a retailer that makes custom minifigs. I guess it does raise the question - would the consoomers still buy that stuff if it's not official, even if it's objectively cooler? Or does the brand name reign supreme? As a grown ass man, i'll admit i've bought some unofficial WW2 minfigs before. You can got a whole platoon for the same price as a handful of official minifigs. I like to think that the passionate autism of custom Lego is above mindless consoomer culture, but I guess some might consider it equivalently vaginal repellent.
 
My disappointment is immeasurable and my day is ruined.

mensch said:
Pretty sure Lego did not do that. It was a retailer that makes custom minifigs. I guess it does raise the question - would the consoomers still buy that stuff if it's not official, even if it's objectively cooler? Or does the brand name reign supreme? As a grown ass man, i'll admit i've bought some unofficial WW2 minfigs before. You can got a whole platoon for the same price as a handful of official minifigs. I like to think that the passionate autism of custom Lego is above mindless consoomer culture, but I guess some might consider it equivalently vaginal repellent.
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Custom minifigs are very popular from my understanding.
 
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