Mockery aside, I think it's important to try to look for NOT someone who matches your interests 100%, but someone who has enough in common (and it has to be something very core to yourself) that you can connect over, but enough differences that you can learn from each other.
Never look for just an Eggman "Now neither of us will be virgins" situation. Most people hate a lot about themselves, do you want someone who's just like you so you can hate them too?
But something in common you gotta have.
For a while I was with a woman, and though she was great and we liked each other intensely, neither of us liked anything that the other one liked. We didn't even share much in ways of life experience, values, opinions, etc. We just really liked each other as persons, and enjoyed each other's company a lot. That can carry you for a while, but sooner or later you start to feel the disconnect. So it fizzled out as we both realized we just weren't for each other, and that we had been keeping it going for its own sake, more than because it was going anywhere.
So, uh, if art is core to you, that's what you gotta look for. Sport, animals, a specific belief, whatever it is. Then explore her world and let her explore yours.
I agree with this, of course I'd like to be with someone that enjoys the same things that I enjoy, but I disagreed with the negativity directed towards these women he had spoken to simply because they liked other things. The quote "So many foids are fucking brain rotted beyond saving" is the main thing I disagree with and what my posts are replying to. The hypocrisy and lack of self-awareness makes my retard brain whir.
The point I was trying to make, which I may not have communicated properly is modern relationships have this sort of 'vibe check'. If a foid remotely has dissimilar interests, any 'sexual' or 'deeper' relationship, beyond 'friend' or really more of an 'acquaintance', is immediately terminated (aka friend zoning). It is very very superficial. This 'vibe check' happens at that 'getting to know each other phase'. This ties back into hypergamy. Why should she, an arguably pretty young woman give her time to you, if you don't pass her 'vibe check'? It is far more easy for her to delete you as a possible sexual candidate and move on to the next moid, of which she has an EXTENSIVE backlog of. Why shouldn't she dig for that 'just right porridge'? This gets more depressing when you tie in mainstream media constantly repeating 'BE YOURSELF, DON'T HOLD BACK, BE AUTHENTICALLY YOU, YOU DEFINITELY WON'T FAIL A TEST YOU DIDN'T KNOW YOU WERE TAKING!!!"
Idk what kind of women you're talking about bro but this is not my experience at all. Also, yeah, it makes sense that a woman wants to have some things in common with the guy she dates, right? Weren't you disparaging the fictional woman in your conversational scenario for liking The Notebook and a nigger band? Presumably this means that you want a relationship where you have things in common with your woman, yes? When I speak to someone and they have different interests from me they naturally fall into a separate category vs someone who does have the same interests as me, as the latter cannot engage with me the same way as the former can. This all makes sense. You are simply too autistic or you are purposefully digging for things to be annoyed about.
Clips of FRIENDS found their way into my doom scrolling. I never really watched the reruns when I was younger. It's shocking to see how casual hookup culture and near constant sex references were in regularly scheduled tv programming. I remember FRIENDS being on right after Full House, as if it was just another normal sitcom.
Friends came out in the nineties
I know that not everyone is a cinemanigger, but you really have no idea the shit that was in theaters or on the TV if you think that Friends is remotely bad lmfao. More things that came out in the nineties, off the top of my head: Sex in the City, Lolita's second adaptation, American Pie, Girls Gone Wild, Eyes Wide Shut, Kids, and a whole host of other American and foreign films to boot that I could list but won't for brevity. Sex acts have been distributed since the invention of the camera. People weren't nearly as prudish in the past as right wing retards online like to portray.
And 00s wxm*n still make it their personality. Speaking of not/sharing interests: Having any to begin with is a point most youth don't even get to. Women don't knit, dudes don't carve wood. Movies, music and games don't count; what do you have left to talk about? I read books, it's not exactly a great opener but it gets the talk going because people don't read anymore, men least of all. If you put me in front of literally any person who reads things that aren't just fed to them from booktok, I'd listen with interest.
When I speak to someone and they have different interests from me they naturally fall into a separate category vs someone who does have the same interests as me, as the latter cannot engage with me the same way as the former can.
It does not matter whether they can relate to your interests or not. You'd probably be just as chuffed about explaining the basics of F1 to someone who's genuinely interested as the most recent FIA ruling over a fucking wing or whatever with someone who knows more about F1 than you do. Shit I'd wager you'd rather introduce someone to your passion. "It's sunday, we gotta watch the cars!" as opposed to "Uhrr the newest /sp/ thread says Alonso is a faggot". That said, F1 has boomed with Stacys for some reason. You could write it off as a dad-sport that her father introduced her to, much like watching tour de france in the summer, but she's probably pumping it to the F1 movie and Drive to Survive.
Depends heavily on whether it's "Stacy caught a whiff of JJK" or "watches depraved life-critical doomer anime from the 90s". Shit I'd take a sailor moon consoomer over someone who willingly watches anime these days. Anime is a vessel to sell manga and even manga is on a downward spiral. You buy into one series and follow it for 30 years, not looking into anything new because you prefer comfort to exploration.
A good woman knows she'll lose to a man in most cases. She would seek a role that she can fulfill. I've been to enough war museums to know there were droves of women volunteering for radar tech and artillery type shit. Nothing convinces me a woman is a decent figure faster than them realizing they're born a certain way and that's how life is. You know, the thing troons willingly ignore.
The point I was trying to make, which I may not have communicated properly is modern relationships have this sort of 'vibe check'. If a foid remotely has dissimilar interests, any 'sexual' or 'deeper' relationship, beyond 'friend' or really more of an 'acquaintance', is immediately terminated (aka friend zoning). It is very very superficial. This 'vibe check' happens at that 'getting to know each other phase'.
Mine either. I don't know if maybe it's because we're on different age demographics (I'm in my early 40's and dating women within a 3-to-5 year range up or down from my age, no younger or older than that), and I'm dealing with people a bit more mature and with more valuable life experience.
Or maybe the dating pool where I live (the least Latin-American country in Latin America) is just mentally healthier than DJT's which I assume is the USA. Cultural differences and all that. I've often heard the horror stories from the US dating world and I think "damn, women here have their issues but what the fuck is that".
Or a combination of both, who knows.
Or maybe it's just the way DJT sees the world, or what he tells himself when he fails for entirely different reasons. We all try to protect our egos sometimes.
It's a multitude of factors. If I was the sort to think with the little head, I would have stayed with my high school sweetheart, but I slowly discovered she's not what I would call wife/mother material. After high school, I realized I probably couldn't seriously date anyone without a car, a place of my own, or enough money in the bank as the foundation for raising a family, so I kept my nose to the grindstone for years. During the time I burned the wick at both ends, I came to learn of the disastrous state of the dating scene and the dynamic between men and women. By the time I had achieved certain milestones (paid-off car, starter home, modest investments), I just didn't feel the motivation to even try.
A few events reignited my desire for fatherhood. "Not all women are like that," I reminded myself, and started going out more, splurging a little bit here and there, downloading dating apps, what have you. It feels impossible, and I know a lot of this can be attributed to me. There are certain things I want in a woman, but when I do see them, she's already spoken for. Lots of women get dismissed because they chose a career over family, and I feel like I'm the same sort of leftovers. If we're talking about women I most relate to, they're much, much older than me, and can't bear my children. I never cared for the company of people my age; they're idiots and they always made me feel put off. That leaves younger women, and while they tend to be physically attractive, that's all they have. They also seem to value things I find frivolous or even objectionable. I don't know what to do other than to quash my sentiments about family. I can also feel a dangerous seed of cynicism taking root; if no one seems to share my values, why should I bother? The west is falling, may as well toss some fireworks into the inferno and have a good time while I can.
Has anyone made an AI driven matchmaking app yet? Something where you just chat with the AI, it profiles you, and then matches you with a woman near you that it thinks you would get along with.
Try keeper.ai. They make an enticing pitch, but they might charge men $50,000 if they actually complete his love quest. I signed up and filled out an embarrassing amount of info about myself. I'd rather not drop 50k to find someone to then pay for a wedding on top of that, but I figure that if I can truly find The One then I won't care about the money (and she probably won't either).
I spend time in right wing spaces online and I see them say things that I agree with, then they'll say some of the worst shit about women that I've ever heard. I try to rationalize it as "it's just online stuff" but then I see it reflected in my real life experiences as well. There's a lot of confusion and uncertainty.
I believe hate is earned by the object of the hatred. That's why I won't argue against racism and I don't post in the moid-hate threads. Open the spoiler if you're feeling open-minded.
Could just be rage bait, but something something kernel of truth.
I know this from personal experience (from an old friend of mine, pretty much family), they guy was everything one could almost ask for: looked young, was healthy, was patient, funny, smart, successful (owns some big stuff around my town, and other city too, I don't want to powerlevel), had several kids with this woman, their families got along with each other... literally everything was perfect, and I know he is a (more than decent) person, as he was personally involved with charities to make the lives of children elsewhere better. I could go on.
One day, his wife decided to leave him for the fucking neighbour, divorced him and left everyone speechless.
This is another reason I'm single. I fear. I fear a lot. It's not some existential dread, or fear of rejection, or climate change, or being assaulted in a dark alley by clowns who tickle me till I wet myself. I fear doing everything I can to ensure I do right by myself and my wife, only to lose out to whimsy and FOMO. The milestones I mentioned above were all achieved in my 20s, which, as I'm made to believe, is an impossibility for my cohort. I guess that means I get to brag or something, but what it really means to me is that I'm very good at molding my world and not falling victim to circumstance. I fear losing everything I worked hard for, gave years of my life for, only for it to be thrown back at my face by a woman whose life I so lovingly contributed to because she's bored and looking for excitement.
Jokes aside, I often see women's wishlists and I find that I often fit the bill (except sometimes height and a willingness to be a paypig). I've been called hot (by true and honest women), anything I'm not capable of, I learn and become capable of, and I get along with almost everyone. I don't have pets, but I like animals too, which is another thing women look for. I suppose my issue is that I'm too paranoid while also holding onto my standards. I could just do the Ralphamale strategy and leave a bunch of bastards in my wake, but I earnestly wish to be a father. I also made the terrible mistake about learning that genetics can affect everything including opinions, so now I really can't let myself lower my standards because my children-to-be will have their futures impacted by the woman I settle for. My standards got even higher after Covid. They might be exceptions, but I think people who lined up for the rushed experimental vaccine are unthinking sheeple, and I worry that the RNA it spliced into people will have latent side effects in them and their offspring. You could wait for data to come out, but at this point, I don't trust "experts" because science is on a leash held by politics. (Playing devil's advocate against myself, I could argue that knocking up basic normie women would mean my children would have a higher chance of reproductive success because they'd have more in comon with the human cattle that we call our countrymen. I sure would burn up inside if I saw them seduced by the decadence and degeneracy of the modern world, though.)
These are little critters that I Pokemon Snap'd on my property. The beetle was on a parking lot at a past job. I don't like invertebrates or amphibians the way you do, but I did find these little guys interesting enough to take a bunch of pictures.
I have lots more in my phone from a state fair I went to, but I'm preferential to mamals and birds. They had the cutest Nigerian Dwarf goats there and one of them put its hooves on my leg the way a dog would. 10/10 experience, would do it again.
Not like I know what they is cuz I ain't gots no STEM degree cuz I ain't no nerd, sheeeeeeeit.
Nothing to add to the discussion but just wanted to update that I got a mean cold and I couldn't go out with Reasonable this weekend. We're still up for seeing a band on Friday though.
This is another reason I'm single. I fear. I fear a lot. It's not some existential dread, or fear of rejection, or climate change, or being assaulted in a dark alley by clowns who tickle me till I wet myself. I fear doing everything I can to ensure I do right by myself and my wife, only to lose out to whimsy and FOMO. The milestones I mentioned above were all achieved in my 20s, which, as I'm made to believe, is an impossibility for my cohort. I guess that means I get to brag or something, but what it really means to me is that I'm very good at molding my world and not falling victim to circumstance. I fear losing everything I worked hard for, gave years of my life for, only for it to be thrown back at my face by a woman whose life I so lovingly contributed to because she's bored and looking for excitement.
Good judgement and a pre-nup are required, don't forget that, bare minimum.
Luckily my example didn't involve a malicious woman, just an insanely capricious one, that went against all logic and expectations by literally everyone that knew her (including her own parents).
I knew her as well (she was kind of like family, mostly because her now ex-husband is like family to me), and my first thought was: "is she being extorted? What the fuck? Did she go actually clinically insane?".
The fact that I had for a moment question myself that seriously, just shows the absolute lunacy of the situation. I hope this doesn't make you more reluctant to meet women, but just know, you need to protect what you've built if unfortunately you meet someone who turns malicious or capricious like that.
Try keeper.ai. They make an enticing pitch, but they might charge men $50,000 if they actually complete his love quest. I signed up and filled out an embarrassing amount of info about myself. I'd rather not drop 50k to find someone to then pay for a wedding on top of that, but I figure that if I can truly find The One then I won't care about the money (and she probably won't either).
This is another reason I'm single. I fear. I fear a lot. [...] I fear losing everything I worked hard for, gave years of my life for, only for it to be thrown back at my face by a woman whose life I so lovingly contributed to because she's bored and looking for excitement.
This is very relatable to me too. I fear acceptance more than rejection too. Always have. Had issues with this and women before. Rejection is whatever because your life continues on as before, which is easy to handle. However, acceptance is more terrifying to me since that implies change and the unknown.
I believe hate is earned by the object of the hatred. That's why I won't argue against racism and I don't post in the moid-hate threads. Open the spoiler if you're feeling open-minded.
Wow a group of random bitches on the Internet, a place famously representative of real life, are saying things.
My issue is that this is just as applicable to men lol. Men and women being shitty to each other or shitty in relationships isn't relegated to one sex. Every woman talking about cheating or sleeping with someone in that video involves a man on the other side who is complicit or active with the situation. Takes two to tango.
You can argue, with clear patterns and evidence, that niggers are more destructive than whitey, but when I see anyone try to say that all men are negative-trait or all women are negative-trait I just don't get it. It's so laughably false and gay. The statistics don't support that argument as well, and neither does my personal observation. Unless all of the women I've met and spoken to have been outliers I suppose. I've met plenty of men who are whores as well, but I don't automatically assume that all or even most men are whores. Same with the women at my college, for example. Most of them seem normal and nice and not duplicitous. The worst thing that could be said is that a few of them are average IQ or awkward. The same is true of the men.
On the other hand, all of the niggers I've met have always had (a) drawback(s) to them that makes me designate them as undesirable for society, but the same cannot be said of women or men as a whole. Hating niggers is based and redpilled, gender wars shit is lame and gay. I generally think that the designation of an entire sex as x is an Internet thing, a homosex thing, or a low IQ thing. Or maybe just bad parenting idk. Although, as is common for children of the late second and current third millennium, my dad left when I was a kid and I don't hate all men.
Edit: Probably gonna be me tbh. It makes me sad, but being in college and learning things makes me happy. It's not likely that I'm going to find someone who is worth leaving college for anyways. People always say: "meet someone while doing your hobby", but my current major hobby is college and, like you, I also don't really get along with people my own age (or younger). I much prefer speaking with my professors. The entire way men and women communicate right now is utterly fucked, not gonna pretend otherwise. I don't know if its retard-brain but the USA also feels very sexless to me. When I was overseas the men and women felt different.
Very good collection of individuals. The spikey guy looks like a ladybug larvae. I like mammals too. When I was in the PNW last week I went to all of the local zoos and aquariums. Saw some tigers, pet some goats, though I prefer sheep. The aquariums were overpriced and they sucked.
Very true. The only man I could excuse from that video is the teacher's son who got used. The reason I posted it is because how blithely shameless they are about their behavior.
College is a weird hobby to have. Are you sure your hobby isn't just learning in-depth and esoteric knowledge? Here's something you can try: a YouTube channel that deep dives academic subjects, like Veritasium, Aydin Paladin/Science Sibyl, Angela Collier, and Rabbit Hole. If you communicate your passions strongly enough, you'll earn an income doing what you love. Heck, you could be an informal professor to your subscribers by sharing the knowledge that really revs your engine. It's not a classroom setting, but you could gain and offer the benefits of one. Aydin Paladin even got married somehow, despite being an autist for social science. Someone out there is going to match your zeal for your special interests, or at least come close enough that you can enjoy each other's company.
I took it to mean that men aren't very manly and women aren't very womanly, which has been the goal of gender equality: emasculated men and turning women into redundant men. It sure reduces the carbon footprint of white people. Isn't it neat how climate change can be used to justify anything? Now, if only we can trick non-whites into falling for it too, but they might be too dumb to perform the requisite mental gymnastics needed to see the virtue of sacrificing one's self on the altar of communistic ideals.
College is a weird hobby to have. Are you sure your hobby isn't just learning in-depth and esoteric knowledge? Here's something you can try: a YouTube channel that deep dives academic subjects
lmao, no. I specifically enjoy taking tests and being asked to write papers about things I don't care about. It's fun, like sudoku. It's not the same if you're not in a group of people all trying to do the same thing, either. That way its a competition. Executive functioning issues also play in here. Unlike TikTok retards, I actually do have autism, and this means that sometimes I can take a test involving complex mathematics and be finished before anyone else in the class, but I can't make a simple phonecall because I don't know exactly what to say or ask. If I wasn't in a program specifically meant to guide someone through education, which is all that college is, I'd probably be rotting like everyone else is. Money is another consideration, of course. Also, no one wants to listen to my monotone retard voice.
No experience and self esteem problems are probably my two largest hurdles.
For the latter, its pretty easy to understand that if you don't think much of yourself it is unlikely for others to feel differently. My issue has always been what to do about it. I have spent a lot of time with self improvement stuff and some of it has been helpful but I still don't feel comfortable in my own skin. I worry about having to twist myself into a pretzel in order for someone to like me. It's silly because I'm not super happy with how I turned out but I still feel like I supposed to "be myself". There is this constant feeling that I have to decive people into liking me. At the end of the day I'm still probably a fairly normal person but for some reason I can't help but think I'm some kind of pariah.
I have no idea of how to approach the whole "I have never dated anyone" issue without coming off as some giant wierdo. A connection between both problems is that by having no dating experience I have no frame of reference for how "attractive" I am. All I have to go on is my own (probably flawed) assessment of myself and my mom/grandma's assertion that (your a very nice boy) lol. Added to all this is the fact that I don’t even know if being in a relationship would even make me happy, but this doesn't apparently stop me from being upset by not being in one.
I'm kinda at a loss for what to do about any of it. I'm still fairly young but I'm far behind the curve so I have some work to do.
- Be handsome and more than 6ft tall (Leg lengthening surgery is for insane people and will make you unable to walk, right? Women are fine with a guy who's 5'8 or 5'9 as long as he's jacked and handsome. Also, lifts are cope, dude.). Do a light cycle of gear and maintain 10% bodyfat post-cycle, but be energetic and sociable despite that.
- Spend lavishly from an unknown source of income, have tons of free time while also making "real 6-figures", but also embody an idyllic working life where equal investment is needed and both people share in their contribution, never have "unequal power" in a relationship.
- Be extremely on-edge about everything you say, have extremely long conversational delays while you screen everything you could say for things that could be unknowingly taken as disrespectful, never speak more than a few sentences about your non-shared interests, while also sharing everything about yourself, while also being slightly mysterious and vague. Facially trust everything a woman says while accepting that you will be second-guessed and treated as an unreliable source of information at every occasion.
I know this is, as a whole, exaggerated, sarcastic, schizobabble, but I don't really know where that ends and reality begins, given it seems like I've witnessed each of these many times in a vaccum.
- Be handsome and more than 6ft tall (Leg lengthening surgery is for insane people and will make you unable to walk, right? Women are fine with a guy who's 5'8 or 5'9 as long as he's jacked and handsome. Also, lifts are cope, dude.). Do a light cycle of gear and maintain 10% bodyfat post-cycle, but be energetic and sociable despite that.
- Spend lavishly from an unknown source of income, have tons of free time while also making "real 6-figures", but also embody an idyllic working life where equal investment is needed and both people share in their contribution, never have "unequal power" in a relationship.
- Be extremely on-edge about everything you say, have extremely long conversational delays while you screen everything you could say for things that could be unknowingly taken as disrespectful, never speak more than a few sentences about your non-shared interests, while also sharing everything about yourself, while also being slightly mysterious and vague. Facially trust everything a woman says while accepting that you will be second-guessed and treated as an unreliable source of information at every occasion.
I know this is, as a whole, exaggerated, sarcastic, schizobabble, but I don't really know where that ends and reality begins, given it seems like I've witnessed each of these many times in a vaccum.
I think you are looking for activity looking for confirmation of these beliefs. Most people I know don't come close to fulfilling this criteria but are still in relationships; some of them successful.
Listen here kid, and listen good... something something lonely crowd, something something spotlight effect! Something something fake it until you make it. Something something cold approach. Something something fish in the sea. Something something she won't mind!
A connection between both problems is that by having no dating experience I have no frame of reference for how "attractive" I am. All I have to go on is my own (probably flawed) assessment of myself and my mom/grandma's assertion that (your a very nice boy) lol.
Well, you don't seem to have any weird "I'm horribly ugly" complexes, you're likely fine. If you want to know whether you're hot, at the 100% risk of sounding like a vain weirdo looksmaxxing loser, give a neutral expression selfie to chatgpt (If you have the paid one) and ask it for an objective and cold assessment of your facial features based on known objective measures of attractiveness. It is willing and able to do this, and can do it with a degree of accuracy, which was unexpected to me.
If you're still fairly young, you should be "mewing" by simply keeping the full area of your tongue resting on the roof of your mouth. This is not just a looksmaxxing thing, it helps prevent sleep apnea and certain disorders related to nerve pinching, breathing, and various ENT/jaw issues later in life.
Also, go to the gym regularly. Duh.
You probably know most of this though because you do the same self improvement rigamarole as I.
The issue many people have is that no matter what you do, despite what people say about "hobbies", you will (most likely) never, ever, meet available women outside of school/colleg unless you really make a huge effort for it, which makes failure far more unpleasant.
Added to all this is the fact that I don’t even know if being in a relationship would even make me happy, but this doesn't apparently stop me from being upset by not being in one.
Generally, people say to "wait" because it becomes their new normal, but this is paramount to telling someone chained to the bottom of a swimming pool that air is kind of overrated and it's just normal-feeling.
Out of the 48 people I consider friends 30 are in/ have been in relationships. Of these 30 I would consider 4 of them to be fat (2 are in a relationship with another fat person). I live in an area of the US not known for fitness.
Out of the 48 people I consider friends 30 are in/ have been in relationships. Of these 30 I would consider 4 of them to be fat (2 are in a relationship with another fat person). I live in an area of the US not known for fitness.
An anecdote, but large sample size.
How old are you? Are you near a college? How do you define fat, as I know a lot of people have lowered the bar drastically for this word? How, generally, would you say your friends met these people? How often do you encounter (as in: see at random on the street, in stores, etc) unaccompanied girls your age who you find attractive?
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