why are you still single - and general discussion of the dating game

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I've been single for a few years now and I'm used to it
I eat when I wanna eat, do what I wanna do and watch what I wanna watch without being nagged and I have a king sized bed to myself

I'm something of a romantic at heart but me and everyone else my age has too much baggage at this point. And lots of available women are single mothers which don't interest me

Have a few FWB to take care of the sex drive and other than that I live my own life
 
I'm an obese ugly black woman at heart despite being an okay looking white male (Very light skinned black man).
 
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Because by the time I was old enough to figure out women, I was too old to start a family, hence why bother?
Oof, I can relate to this. Also, I was a pussy in my youth and breakups made me suicidal. I just couldn't take being heartlessly discarded one more time.

But I have a much younger brother with autism. My dad pushes him hard to date, marry, and make grandchildren. But it's just impossible for him, and the women his age are all just horrible cunts.

My dad keeps giving him all these literal boomer takes on how to meet women and it's all horribly outdated and ineffective advice. The last thing he made him do is pay to join some dance hall. Almost all the women said that that he was "creepy" and refused to dance with him.

My brother's loser friends have all done better than him with women. One is a registered sex offender for committing incest as a teen. My brother has a much better job than them. But women still want those bad boys and make little bastard babies with them. I don't get it.
 
I've seen several women on dating apps now literally go "I am religious and want to marry with children". One was a literal fucking priest at 28. Now that shit is hot: Pursuing something thoroughly, even if religion. There seems to be a lot going on in just about any moderate size church here, and since it's not just a gathering point for losers and addicts, it's probably a viable place to find a Lord-fearing woman. Imagine how wet her psalms will be when you say "I was turned from sin by He".
Those are called tradcons and are to be treated with caution. Seriously, half those hoes have body counts in the triple digits and realized no man wants them and they're trying to get ahead of the game. You have to be very cautious around those types. The people bullying Pick Mes are wrong for bullying them, but adapting and doing shit like this is the way of the future. Be cautious.

no way to really meet people anymore, im not just walking up to a woman in Supermarket with a smile, it doesn't exactly upset me mind you but destruction of public recreation has been the worst thing imaginable for American society and its only going to cause shit like the Birth Rates to get worse
The problem isn't just destruction of public recreation, it's destruction of public recreation for young people. Whenever I go out nowadays, most of what I see are either couples or people my age or older. You hardly see any groups of young women anymore. They exist, it just isn't as common.

My only hope is to try and meet people through hobbies or mutual friends.
You know, I never really understood the hobbies angle. My hobbies are for me. If my woman wants to share in them, I'm happy to teach her. But I'm not going to go actively out and hunt for women who want to do my hobbies with me. I do them when I want to be alone.

I’m not good with people. Just don’t understand them much less women. Plus I never put in the effort for it because I’m retarded. Honestly, I don’t think I’m mentally well enough to try and find someone to settle down with.
People are easy. You want the crash course? Here you go:
1. Everyone is selfish. Stop having expectations.
2. Everyone is going to do the path of least resistance.
3. Everyone is going to do what is easiest for them.
3b. Also, people don't like options and choices. Don't give them any.
4. For women, take everything they say and invert it. Ex. If they say they want a nice guy, be an ass hole to her and she'll let you walk her around on a literal dog leash.

There you go, that's it. Plan and act accordingly. As long as you keep this in mind and don't internalize it and hold hostility against people for acting this way, you'll have great relationships.

Due to life circumstances, I am in a place where I don't know anyone and have no way to meet women organically. The nearest person I know lives on the other side of the continent.
Start being social and things will fall into place. Don't be a NEET. Talk to everyone.

My dad keeps giving him all these literal boomer takes on how to meet women and it's all horribly outdated and ineffective advice. The last thing he made him do is pay to join some dance hall. Almost all the women said that that he was "creepy" and refused to dance with him.
Man up and be a good brother. You teach him. Don't let your dad teach him. You want him to be social and approachable. Autism might be a condition, but you can learn to be less awkward. Teaching him how to approach women isn't impossible.
 
was a literal fucking priest at 28
>was 28
>in the past tense
>is probably 30+ at this point

Why are people on this site so old by "being mean on the internet" standards? I can't relate to anyone here!

No wonder everyone here is like "boy just go to the diner and give her a firm handshake, she'll do whatever you tell her and suck you off in the bathroom." You are all past the neuroplastic decline point at 25!
 
I broke up my years long relationship (beginning from college) once I started to focus hard on my career (software) and became a money-obsessed techbro, and I've never been back into dating.

I also lost some of my friends that I stopped paying attention to because they weren't in the same industry or were not connected well (or below me). I never thought it'd happen and that I'd be different from the usual loser nerdy programmer types around me but nope, I may talk to women and I might appear social at work but zoom out just a bit and I'm the same as the rest of them. And worse yet, I don't even care unless it affects my career or health.
 
I've never had a relationship due to a number of reasons, but my biggest problem is I'm just extremely socially awkward. Me holding a conversation for longer than a few minutes just feels like a chore which kinda makes it hard for me to make connections in general, let alone with a girl.

Also I have to agree with the whole sentiment of theres not many outlets to meet people my age anymore. I want to find a partner and I wanna at least get closer to someone by the end of the summer, but I just don't see it happening right now
 
Definitely by choice. Definitely because of inadequacy and fear. The only relationships in my family I've seen not end in someone cheating are grandparents (dubious on father's side). Even my friends have an odd bit they ignore: two were in a pretty long term relationship until they I suppose left each other. Not a few months later, she gets with another guy in the friend group. They say they went to the previous friend and he was okay with it, but my gut tells me this is wrong. Especially because we don't see him much anymore. All of this compounds into me being utterly terrified of a similar or worse situation happening to me. What do I do? Simply ignore the blatant examples around me and charge headfirst into a forest littered with bear traps? I'd rather not be in the forest at all without a guarantee. Which I can't get because people aren't machines
 
I've spent many years solo developing a yet to be released software product. To do this I've been living very frugally on a tight budget. I keep telling myself once its established I'll be able to find something real.

Lookwise, I'm tall, reasonably good looking and still look young enough to be a student. Cold-approaching isn't actually a problem for me either and I'm surprisingly socially adept for someone so isolated, but WFH doesn't give me many opportunities.

Unfortunately I'm guarded about my age and how unsuccessful I am, so I'm worried about revealing the real me. Dating apps aren't a solution, as they all require me to put my age, and I don't want to start a relationship off with a lie. I only find a certain phenotype super attractive too, which is frustrating.

I'm so lonely, I even dreamt last night of an illusory woman asking if I had a girlfriend. Not even a sexual dream, I'm even fantasising about simple companionship.
 
Those are called tradcons
I'm unsure who would be the worst grifter of both: Breadtubers who like to LARP as Communist guerilla or Online Tradcons who like to LARP as a 20th century conservative because both appeal to outdated worldviews that have minimal practicality for today's standards.
My dad keeps giving him all these literal boomer takes on how to meet women and it's all horribly outdated and ineffective advice.
Older generations have no grasp on current dating dynamics. Most either haven't felt a damn thing for their fiancées in years and their marriage just lingers on or they're divorced and usually date divorced people with a failed marriage under their belt which inevitably won't be much younger or older than them.

Quite a different context than a young man looking for his first (potential) girlfriend.
im not just walking up to a woman in Supermarket with a smile
This only works on gay-ass romantic comedy movies. The ideal situation to meet a woman has always been through a group of friends in which the girl is coincidentally single and looking for a partner (supply and demand situation) or through some activity in common (trade school, martial arts, whatever).

Bars or clubs aren't quite the ideal places to meet a potential partner. Too many damaged people. Some random-ass place like a convenience store or bus stop is very fucking unlikely. Dating apps are still a trend but your psyche is going to shit before you even land your first match. Not to mention it's a fucking pain in the ass, be it swiping right 'till match and you hopefully don't get ghosted or trying to be more picky and you hopefully don't get ghosted.

Anyone who tells you otherwise is bullshitting you.

I don't know how Tinder and other dating apps are seen in America/The West nowadays but where I'm from they're still a thing even when you have dudes falling for ambushes through fake accounts never to be heard from again.
I'm assuming you're in the USA, and if so, the dating apps' people pool must be a lot worse than it is here in my Latin American shithole.
I don't know which country you're from but LatAm isn't that great either. An average dude won't attract much attention unless he's willing to put up an image that isn't that obvious to see through. Latinos are keen on saving face because it's part of the culture but it gets to a point where people bullshit each other a lot. It's almost like life is a telenovela to them.

Not to mention what I mentioned above about ambushes and fake accounts.

Me personally I ain't willing to get down with that.
I'm something of a romantic at heart but me and everyone else my age has too much baggage at this point.
The hardest thing is finding someone who isn't some cynical fuck. Not because of life experiences but because they're pricks. Too many douchebags and bitches hide behind life experiences to act insincere and entitled towards people.

To these kind of people I wish them a lonely death because they're the ones who most warrant it. Even when I know there's always someone who'll tag along with them for fear of being alone thus never letting nature take its course keeping them from their well-deserved fate.

I used to be naive hanging out with people like this but now I have zero patience. I hope life keeps fucking with them.
Start being social and things will fall into place. Don't be a NEET. Talk to everyone.
Easier said than done, pal. He doesn't need to talk to people. He needs to form connections.

Everybody talks to people everyday.

Getting people to like you is another matter and that usually gets harder as we age.
You know, I never really understood the hobbies angle.
Because not everyone feels like putting up a facade to meet people by going to clubs or whatever. People who don't mind treating others like emotional crutches or sex objects have no problem with that because they like to live life as a sitcom.
 
The older and bitterer I get, the more convinced I am that there really is something like Fate at work. I sincerely believe I could have a six pack and a billion dollars and a perfect tan and a 7 inch dick, and I would still be invisible to women. That may sound defeatist and fatalist and Calvinist and blackpilled, and you're probably right. I may not even believe it when I wake up tomorrow. But right now, I do.
 
The older and bitterer I get, the more convinced I am that there really is something like Fate at work. I sincerely believe I could have a six pack and a billion dollars and a perfect tan and a 7 inch dick, and I would still be invisible to women.
Have you considered that you may just have an unacceptably shitty and detestable personality that no amount of money or muscle could ever compensate for? There's a reason why women still cheat on billionaires.
 
Have you considered that you may just have an unacceptably shitty and detestable personality that no amount of money or muscle could ever compensate for? There's a reason why women still cheat on billionaires.
66f.webp
No.
 
High school: bad luck and even worse ability to notice if anyone is even remotely interested in me at all. I want to beat the shit out of my younger self for fucking those chances up.
Post High School: badluck++ and whatever the fuck is going on today in modern society plus economic problems (I shouldn't be in the red for much longer now...)

I feel that I can Facebook Dating a little more but it's nearly if not just as bad as Tinder here on the East Coast. I'll get a few matches at a time and most simply never respond or are clearly not at all interested with one word answers. For some reason the retarded jeet coded algo thinks I should try long distance with some hot looking goth girls 2000 miles away from me in the mid-west every now and again when I bother to try my luck. I'm not ask for much, my standards are basically rock bottom and I can die happy just being able to experience one relationship so I can consider myself human. Unfortunately the last chopper has left nam thanks to dating apps. All I have are vidya gaymes to waste time when my circle of friends aren't planning to do something or going to work. I'm sorry Dad, I actually wanted to give you grandchildren as well. Best I can do is being an uncle.
 
Because every single time I try to form a good relationship with someone, something goes haywire that is literally not even in my control. Everyone will disagree with this, but when insane stuff is occurring when I am not there that I literally have nothing to do with, what else am I left to think? It's as if God himself seeks to make my life specifically more difficult for some reason. So, I've given up on helping everyone, because nothing I do continues to help them improve their lives. Why else is it that people who were decent, good human beings previously, then consistently become terrible after being in my presence?
 
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