The best are the VPs who have their bimbo secretaries call in for them when they are three states away. How the fuck are you supposed to fix something that is hundreds of miles away from the person calling in about it?
At the casino again, Food and Beverage was the one department outside of the CEO who had a secretary. Director of F&B needed something and tried to pass it off on her, unfortunately, that was one person trying to exercise control over another's account, and we don't fucking do that. I tell her he'll need to put in a ticket or request and I can do it for him, she tells me he's busy, I tell her if he needs IT to fix something he can't be that busy. She tries to assert authority as his legal agent, I call her a secretary, her tone suddenly shifts into 100% bitch mode "I AM AN EXECUTIVE ADMINISTRATIVE ASSISTANT!" - "You're a secretary, you're also not [BOSS'S NAME], so I can't do that for you." Damn near 15 minutes of her going full fucking I WILL DESTROY YOU maximum bitch mode. I just walk away and go back to my office, which has a self-locking door. She starts calling and demanding I fucking perform the duty, tell her I need homeboy to make the request, she refuses, so I hang up and call the switchboard and tell them if she's requesting me, to refuse. So she gets connected to my boss who was off-property, he calls to ask what the problem is; tell him I'm five minutes away from breaking a wine bottle and stabbing her in the fucking neck, he tells me to cool it and what's the problem, I explain it, and tell him that she went full fucking bitch mode and a severe beating is the least she deserves for the shit she said. My boss takes care of it for me, and tells me not to threaten other employees... whatever man, she's fucking useless, and psychotic.
As an aside, job I had as a contractor for the government. Had a device that was special, that's all I'll say about it, but the network and security guys say it's not governed by their GPOs. They do something and suddenly no one can log onto the computer, and get a "the sign-on method isn't allowed, contact your network administrator." I contact them, they tell me the updates I applied did something, I show them I can login, if I restart the computer with the network cable unplugged, and yet when plugged in, suddenly I can't, ergo it must be something on the network affecting it. Damn near a year long battle back and forth with the network team telling me it's a local issue, despite the issue not being there when it's not connected to the network. But the real piece that stays in my memory, is some military officer sat down and was trying to troubleshoot, and suggested swapping cables, and when I brought up Port Security, he tells me, openly, that they don't use port security... which is just flat out wrong. Like you dumb mother-fucker, yes you do, everything in this fucking building does, don't fucking lie to me.
and then let the managers suck it up and deal with what you did. Worst case scenario, they'll tell you to CTRL+Z everything.
All in all, fun job.
