Weird and Cringe things you've seen while working in IT - Since everyone is too lazy to make such a thread where IT bros can vent

[Nitro!]

Apparently adding new cronjobs is considered hacking and touching crontab is a last resort hail mary.

Sounds like someone didn't adhere to The Process. The Process be Praised!

 

[Jotch]

Sounds like someone didn't adhere to The Process. The Process be Praised!

when something is 20 years old and the guy who built it has been gone for years, and no one does anything about it, people start treating it like some kind of magic artifact that you should never touch.

 

[MinecraftPissBalzz]

Im not working in IT cause im studying it, but the amount of people in my class that dont read and constantly ask what and how is concerning me

 

[Jotch]

Im not working in IT cause im studying it, but the amount of people in my class that dont read and constantly ask what and how is concerning me

think of it as job security

 

[Betonhaus]

Sounds like someone didn't adhere to The Process. The Process be Praised!

Of course nowadays something like that is extremely realistic even for something that basic because of either:

• IT is infested with jeets that are all faking knowledge of their job and can't do anything without it being made into a checklist first
• Somebody did something really hacky way back when so if you do something common sense it causes everything to break.
• Both.

 

[DavidS877]

Im not working in IT cause im studying it, but the amount of people in my class that dont read and constantly ask what and how is concerning me

Reading is important.
One of my customer's employees was setting up some software for my company to use. Customer guy says the log says "Server Startup Failed.". A couple days later they're still having trouble. I login, read the same log file and about 10 lines earlier "Connection timed out to A.B.C.D on Port XYZ" I ask them, "Hey, is there a firewall between here and A.B.C.D?" Customer "Um, yes"... Well there's your FUCKING PROBLEM.

 

[teriyakiburns]

For months, I've been dealing with the impositions of a "project manager" at this little startup of ours, who takes on too much responsibility, accedes to every client demand (with the resulting crunch for a bunch of unanticipated new features) and catastrophises over tiny little issue, while claiming he's just being realistic. He's away this week. Stand-ups have taken 10 minutes instead of 45 and we've got more done in the last five days than the last two weeks. I'm not looking forward to monday.

He's not even indian.

 

[SIMON THE PIEMAN]

Stand-ups have taken 10 minutes instead of 45 and we've got more done in the last five days than the last two weeks. I'm not looking forward to monday.

He's not even indian.

This phenomenon needs to be studied. I've had a coworker do the same to us and whenever he went on vacation our meetings would become really short and to the point. The BAU was that he would ask tons of unnecessary and pointless questions and whenever he had to present something he'd go into unnecessary detail to the point of absurd.
To provide an allegory, let's say I would say something like "I made a hamburger yesterday" and he'd start asking questions like "could you describe the process of obtaining beef and making minced meat out of it?" If he would be to talk about making a hamburger he'd go into details about the diameter and materials of the pan used to fry the meat, but that's only after telling us the history of the company that made the pan. And he would do that with every topic, every single time.
The worst thing was that - despite all these things - he was somehow really competent when he actually worked on something instead of yapping. So we couldn't even tell him to shut up and risk pissing him off because his overall contribution was a huge net positive. I would work with this guy again if given the chance, despite his shortcomings.

 

[Lip Glossary]

I just committed my own cringe and I can't believe it worked. I threw a hail Mary that landed.
We were having a zoom meeting about how to get our csat scores up. Your csat is basically your score that shows your boss how satisfied customers are with you. My csat has hovered between 85-90% since I became a CSA, which literally puts me in the top 1% of the employees of my company.
So I just took a gamble and this is how it went:
Me: (Bosses name, Bosses name) excuse me, I'm very sorry to interrupt, but this entire meeting is about our csat scores and how to improve them right?
Boss: Yes it is.
Me: Ok, I have consistently been in the top five percent of agents since you moved me over from (the department I used to work at before they stuck me in customer service because I refuse to take the vaccination), correct?
Boss: Yes.
Me: Ok, so why am I sitting here in this meeting? Obviously I know what to do and I have gotten half a dozen personal congratulations and gift cards from corporate.
Boss: (My name), What is your point?
Me: My point is why am I sitting here in this meeting? Obviously I'm on the right track and I need to stay the course. If you're not going to let me tell everyone else how to get it done then I think that everyone who has a csat score of 85 or higher should be able to leave this meeting and take the rest of the day off.
Boss: (pauses) You know what? (My name) is right. I'm going to read a list of all the people with a csat over 85% last quarter and you are free to leave the meeting and enjoy the rest of your day.
Fast forward to half past 3:
I am currently drinking my first Budweiser and the meat just hit the grill. I just talked my boss into giving me a day off for being fucking competent.

 

[SchizoDaemon]

This phenomenon needs to be studied. I've had a coworker do the same to us and whenever he went on vacation our meetings would become really short and to the point. The BAU was that he would ask tons of unnecessary and pointless questions and whenever he had to present something he'd go into unnecessary detail to the point of absurd.

The long standup meeting (anything past 10 minutes is too long IMO), saps all my energy right at the point in the day when I am most productive (the morning).