TheReportOfTheWeek / Reviewbrah - fancy lad fast food reviewer

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WonderWino said:
What is it with so many restaurants coming up with burgers that have nonsensical stuff on them like chips or onion rings?
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I absolutely concur with the notion that chips or onion rings (or any kind of potato) does not belong in a burger or sandwich. But the answer to your question is easy: take whatever ingredients you already have in the kitchen and reconfigure them in a way you haven't done before, call it a new product, and charge a premium price for it. Taco Bell is especially notorious for this; they have taken the same refried beans, taco fillings, rice, and tortillas and spun them off in various configurations into about 30 distinct products, all of which taste pretty much the same. But almost all of the big chains have resorted to this depressing trick. It costs them nothing, but opens up a new revenue stream at least for a brief while. Or it just flops, but they lose nothing.
 
Señora Airi said:
I'll disagree only because having chips on a ham and cheese after swimming was like manna.

TAX: New Little Caesar's review: https://youtube.com/watch?v=0PfYkgucg04
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At least Reviewbrah got something good after being assaulted by expired Crazy Sauce.

I do give them points for variety. I laughed at "collectable box". Do people really collect these? I know there's a market for cereal boxes. And that some collectors prefer the cereal be kept sealed inside its cardboard tomb forever. I remember this from X Entertainment articles where the guy would open up expired retro cereal. But the box itself is usually clean as long as its inner contents are still bagged up. A pizza box is gonna be hella greasy no matter how careful you are. Maybe you can come in and pay for an extra box if you are some Marvel or Little Caesar's sperg.
 
Every time he rates something horrible I imagine some "food designer"or whatever they're called employed by the fast food chain has to sit through and watch the entire video destroying his creation, then has to answer questions why the food he designed is so shit at a meeting at corporate HQ.
 
monk said:
Every time he rates something horrible I imagine some "food designer"or whatever they're called employed by the fast food chain has to sit through and watch the entire video destroying his creation, then has to answer questions why the food he designed is so shit at a meeting at corporate HQ.
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Even if they bring an actual professional chef, they will still need to take his food and jury rig ingredients at McDonald's to fit it.
 
wtfNeedSignUp said:
Even if they bring an actual professional chef, they will still need to take his food and jury rig ingredients at McDonald's to fit it.
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I assume the big problem is making the half-products that actually hold up being deep frozen and unthawed that still keep the texture and flavor of the unfrozen ingredients. Freezing really changes the texture of stuff and can dry it and give it freezer burn. Then another variable is how competent is the minimum wage nigger that's preparing it at the franchise.
 
monk said:
I assume the big problem is making the half-products that actually hold up being deep frozen and unthawed that still keep the texture and flavor of the unfrozen ingredients. Freezing really changes the texture of stuff and can dry it and give it freezer burn. Then another variable is how competent is the minimum wage nigger that's preparing it at the franchise.
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It's also a problem, but look at the McDonald's wrap video to see it's all Frankenstein of common items. You can bet the guy making the chicken tortilla didn't use a generic chicken strip.
 
I enjoy knowing he holds disdain for the thumbnails.



Also: He looks ill from eating Taco Bell and not the blood he requires.
 
It took me a minute to understand the title is the actual product. It fits since it's the usual paying too much for a product only to not receive the sauces advertized, that are themselves randomized for some god forsaken reason.

I don't know why restaurants keep forgetting to send sauces.
 
wtfNeedSignUp said:
I don't know why restaurants keep forgetting to send sauces.
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Have you been in a fast food restaurant recently? They're all running with half the staff they're supposed to have, and the staff they do have consists of stoned and bored teenagers, niggers with prison records, and recent third-world immigrants who barely speak English all presided over by a shift manager who hates their job, their staff, and their very existence on this planet. If you're lucky, there might actually be served by a mildly retarded person working there as a charity case, who will be the only person who cares enough to do the job right and wants to be there.
 
OrangeJuliusEvola said:
Have you been in a fast food restaurant recently? They're all running with half the staff they're supposed to have, and the staff they do have consists of stoned and bored teenagers, niggers with prison records, and recent third-world immigrants who barely speak English all presided over by a shift manager who hates their job, their staff, and their very existence on this planet. If you're lucky, there might actually be served by a mildly retarded person working there as a charity case, who will be the only person who cares enough to do the job right and wants to be there.
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Missing the temporary foreign worker making up 60% of the staffing level. In Canada. Singh Hortons is s meme for a reason.
 
OrangeJuliusEvola said:
If you're lucky, there might actually be served by a mildly retarded person working there as a charity case, who will be the only person who cares enough to do the job right and wants to be there.
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Retards and work release inmates are probably the best workers at these places. The retards are actually operating at their level and if you're a retard and you decided on work instead of tard bucks, you're probably a high quality person otherwise. As for the work release, they'd rather be anywhere other than prison.

One of the best co-workers I ever had in one of these food/retail type jobs on the night shift most people had in their early 20s was a dude convicted of second-degree murder. Very chill guy. The guy he killed seriously had it coming.
 
I unironically love reviewbrah.
Think I first learned about him on /fit/ and that had to be like a decade ago now.
That he's still doing his thing (and also pretty much looks exactly the same) is pretty impressive to me.

Wearing suits all the time and being a shortwave radio enthusiast. Idk I guess it's weird, but it's quirky and interesting.
It's his thing and I respect it.
He's really carved out a niche and is a cool part of internet culture.

Also it's funny now since fast food has become so completely trash.
Most of his videos now are just about how everything completely fucking sucks and is overpriced.

Except for papa johns, that seems to be the only place that is not complete shit.
 
bookers said:
Also it's funny now since fast food has become so completely trash.
Most of his videos now are just about how everything completely fucking sucks and is overpriced.
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I'll note that McDick's couldn't even get including a sauce with nugs correct. Nugs are basically worthless without the sauce. And this is on a $17 meal that is basically a Happy Meal for adult faggots.
 
AnOminous said:
I'll note that McDick's couldn't even get including a sauce with nugs correct. Nugs are basically worthless without the sauce. And this is on a $17 meal that is basically a Happy Meal for adult faggots.
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If they wanted to be really retro they'd put the nuggets in the old styrofoam containers. Screw the environment. I need to feel like I'm seven again.
 
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