Yea Japanese has dozens of speech patterns. But they are overall far drier than what you see differentiating English. The differences are far more based in extremely vague and esoteric grammatical differences as opposed to English that is far less structured and more fluid. It isn’t anything inherently wrong with the language but acting like Japanese isn’t way more clinical than English is silly
What does any of that mean in practical terms? The differences in speech in Japanese are "vague" and "esoteric"? As in, they're unclear and only understood by a small group? Yeah, if you don't fucking know Japanese, then yeah anything related to the language is going to be unclear to you. I think it's safe to say native speakers find the grammatical differences to be obvious and known by everyone.
English is less "structured" and more "fluid"? Yeah, those adjective don't have any formal definition in relation to languages. Maybe in relation to how someone talks, but not in comparing different languages to each other. What makes a language more structured or fluid than another language? Are you suggesting that English has more ways to express the same idea than Japanese? I have my doubts on that. If you say something like "I'm going to go to the store." you could modify that by contracting or not contracting certain words, replace the verb "go" with something conveying the same basic idea like "head" to the store or "leave for" the store, or speak in more roundabout way that adds some extra information like "I
plan to go to the store". In Japanese say we take 私はお店に行く as the starting point, we could change the first-person pronoun to half a dozen others that each signify something about the speaker, drop the first-person pronoun entirely if the speaker thinks it's obvious they're talking about themself, drop the は signifying the subject of the sentence, using が instead which signifies the actor of the sentence thereby putting emphasis on the action or who's doing it, possibly drop the honorific お before 店 (store) for extra informality, use に or へ depending on if you want emphasis the store as the place you're going or as the direction you're heading, use other verbs in place of 行く (go) like 向かう (head towards) or 出かける (leave for), you can add extra information like saying you're planning to go (つもり) or that you're planning to come back (行って来ます), or add various sentence endings that can add emphasis, politeness, or signify other things about the speaker in relation to the listener.
Was it autistic of me to write all that out? Yeah, but anyone can just make vague, generalized assertions about something. I'm giving some basic concrete examples to show that in the end, it seems like there's at least just as many ways to express this in Japanese as there is in English, so I don't see where English-speakers are more "free" with their speech.
And Japanese is more "clinical"? That means "in relation to medicine" or sometimes "done with precision and cool dispassion". So you're trying to get across, what, Japanese sounds unemotional and like professional talk at all times? Well that's just wrong based on the fact that Japanese has any sort of casual speech and slang, which is has plenty of.
There's nothing "dry" about Japanese that needs "punching up" in English. If you translated a bunch of Japanese dialogue into a bunch of super literal word-by-word sentences that all read the same because you completely ignored the variances that get across information about who's speaking, how, and why, then that's you're own fault, not the Japanese language. The same exact thing can easily happen going from English to Japanese as well, and often does in poor Eng-to-Jap translations.