The Cole Smithey Thread

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It must really tick Chris off that not only does Cole have a sugar mama who pays for him to fuck around, but he also has better tits than him.
 
Cole Smithey is the Andrew Dobson if Film Critics. Bitches about Trump and claims to love what they do but can’t be bothered to put effort in and massive egos.
 

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Fatty needs to lose some pounds. Why would anyone wanna be even remotely unhealthy like Chris is anyone's guess.
 
ObeseScreamingBlackMan said:
I've always suspected Cole of having some crappy service industry job during the day.

And at night the Mrs. probably parks him behind the bar to serve drinks or has him doing something else for their place.
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late reply but it seems he does his walking tour of Carniggo Hall 6 days a week. It's probably the bulk of his income now and the critic stuff just lends him credence.

There's a case to be said that he still dresses like a cartoon hipster because that's what Chinese tourists expect.

It's 35 bucks so if anyone wants to ask him about Chris it's a hell of a lot cheaper than spending hundreds at his wife's bar.
 
Orkeosaurus said:
late reply but it seems he does his walking tour of Carniggo Hall 6 days a week. It's probably the bulk of his income now and the critic stuff just lends him credence.

There's a case to be said that he still dresses like a cartoon hipster because that's what Chinese tourists expect.

It's 35 bucks so if anyone wants to ask him about Chris it's a hell of a lot cheaper than spending hundreds at his wife's bar.
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Chris should buy a ticket.
 
Real G said:
Lol, dont give Chris any ideas, or he will drive barb up to New York and drops her off at Carnegie Hall and drives off.

ITS UR PROBLEM NOW, LADDA BITCHHHHHHHH
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Not really.. I get the feeling Cole would be all to delighted to leave her there to decay.

And rightfully so.
 
It's telling about Barb's personality that even the mentally stunted son, who was groomed from birth to love her unquestioningly, is now showing signs of wanting Barb out of his life. The fact that Chris expresses annoyance and even anger toward his mother (albeit behind her back) is surprising given how little backbone he has.

I do wonder what could be gained from another conversation between Chris and Cole. It's likely Chris would want more than a contest vote.
 
Cedric_Eff said:
Cole Smithey is the Andrew Dobson if Film Critics. Bitches about Trump and claims to love what they do but can’t be bothered to put effort in and massive egos.
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I kind of wish he was a Trump supporter, because that would be an edgy take for a New York film critic and would make him a perfect sibling nemesis to Chris-Chan.

Alas though, different paths same ends with these two. Both voted FOR HER, Both are fat with tits, and both have nothing better to do than mill about and broadcast on the internet.

The only major difference is that Chris is somewhat e-famous whereas if Cole Smithey didn't have a wife, he'd be begging for quarters outside the Empire State Building.
 
ChurchOfGodBear said:
It's telling about Barb's personality that even the mentally stunted son, who was groomed from birth to love her unquestioningly, is now showing signs of wanting Barb out of his life. The fact that Chris expresses annoyance and even anger toward his mother (albeit behind her back) is surprising given how little backbone he has.

I do wonder what could be gained from another conversation between Chris and Cole. It's likely Chris would want more than a contest vote.
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Barb wants Chris to love her unconditionally, but doesn't seem to really love Chris. She doesn't seem to have any "mommy" drive. Does she know much about Sonichu? Does she know Chris' favorite meal? Why isn't she concerned with teaching Chris life skills like how to cook and scrub a shower?

Chris does a lot for Barb, but it appears to be a one way street.
 
SheCameForNecky said:
Barb wants Chris to love her unconditionally, but doesn't seem to really love Chris. She doesn't seem to have any "mommy" drive. Does she know much about Sonichu? Does she know Chris' favorite meal? Why isn't she concerned with teaching Chris life skills like how to cook and scrub a shower?

Chris does a lot for Barb, but it appears to be a one way street.
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Barb's a total cunt, but in her defense, I wouldn't ask my 40 year old child about their sonic recolor even if I loved them more than anything else.
 
SheCameForNecky said:
Barb wants Chris to love her unconditionally, but doesn't seem to really love Chris. She doesn't seem to have any "mommy" drive. Does she know much about Sonichu? Does she know Chris' favorite meal? Why isn't she concerned with teaching Chris life skills like how to cook and scrub a shower?

Chris does a lot for Barb, but it appears to be a one way street.
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Watch the depressing Christmas video, it is obvious Borb was sick to fucking death of sonichu at that point.
 
Slowinthemind said:
Watch the depressing Christmas video, it is obvious Borb was sick to fucking death of sonichu at that point.
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Is there any doubt it was all Chris could talk about from the day he made it? I'm pretty sure he spent most of the previous years constantly hammering about Pokémon and sonic individually too.
 
SheCameForNecky said:
Barb wants Chris to love her unconditionally, but doesn't seem to really love Chris. She doesn't seem to have any "mommy" drive. Does she know much about Sonichu? Does she know Chris' favorite meal? Why isn't she concerned with teaching Chris life skills like how to cook and scrub a shower?

Chris does a lot for Barb, but it appears to be a one way street.
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I think we like to paint Barb as utterly evil and self centered, and yeah she's pretty unlikable, but I do think Barb tried to do what she could for Chris when he was younger. I can't imagine what it would be like to raise a severely autistic kid in the 80s. Something deffinetly snapped in her in the late 90s after she retired, but let's not act like she didn't love Chris and just mentally abused him his entire life. In fact, Chris genuinely looked happy as a child.
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PuckishRogue said:
Barb's a total cunt, but in her defense, I wouldn't ask my 40 year old child about their sonic recolor even if I loved them more than anything else.
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You're not a mother. Mothers are supposed to adore stupid bullshit. Besides, it puts food in her mouth and shit in her hoard.

Slowinthemind said:
Watch the depressing Christmas video, it is obvious Borb was sick to fucking death of sonichu at that point.
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I need to look that up, although from my memory, I suspect Bob was suffering from depression. Barb may have been also.
 
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