The Cole Smithey Thread

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Every time this thread comes 'round I think it's because Chris has finally went to NY to hunt Cole down. Man. We need something big to close out this year and a Cole/Chris smack down...

That would be sick.
 
I can't understand why Cole's film reviews on YouTube have such low view counts. I've watched a few of them, and whilst they're not earth-shaking, I've seen a lot worse.
If you're faced with a crowd of overly dry and elaborately overthinking critics, Cole Smithey woudn't stand out in the least.
 
You mean he's being serious when he calls himself the smartest film critic in the world? Man oh man, that is the game changer. Consider me educated. Fuck Cole and fuck his YouTube channel.
 
Every time this thread comes 'round I think it's because Chris has finally went to NY to hunt Cole down. Man. We need something big to close out this year and a Cole/Chris smack down...

That would be sick.
I've said it before and I'll say it again:
I'd watch a sitcom based on the concept of Barb dying and Chris tracking Cole down in NYC and moving in against Cole's wishes.
Prime TV there.
 
I've said it before and I'll say it again:
I'd watch a sitcom based on the concept of Barb dying and Chris tracking Cole down in NYC and moving in against Cole's wishes.
Prime TV there.
In reality, if Chris were to ever get that far, he would just sit outside Cole's place of residence and do live facebook feeds everyday begging people to kill Cole with something.
Chris would also get the LGBT and Blacks involved claiming that Cole raped him as a lesbian child along with his imaginary black friend named "Tybarius Jones"
 
I've said it before and I'll say it again:
I'd watch a sitcom based on the concept of Barb dying and Chris tracking Cole down in NYC and moving in against Cole's wishes.
Prime TV there.

You think Cole will play his sax in the next Chris music album?
 
In reality, if Chris were to ever get that far, he would just sit outside Cole's place of residence and do live facebook feeds everyday begging people to kill Cole with something.
Chris would also get the LGBT and Blacks involved claiming that Cole raped him as a lesbian child along with his imaginary black friend named "Tybarius Jones"
And then Cole tries to find support as well. Manages to find it... but much to his horror they all remind him of Bob.
 
You can blame the Chris issues on advanced maternal age. Cole was conceived in Barb's prime birthing years, and he's not much better. What accounts for that?

Barb must have had some pretty rotten eggs.
Wow he lowered it down to a mere $250. Didn't it used to be like $5000?
The only one on his feedback went for $0.99. From the buyer, "A bargain at twice the price." He apparently learned his negotiating skills from Chris. $5000, or $0.99, but no less. I think that is still a little too much to spend for the right to buy drinks for a middle age nobody.
 
The Chris and Cole Show.

Eh. Maybe?
I like the idea of Chris interrupting Cole recording a movie review and trying to get him to review something like Filmation's Ghostbusters, Transformers The Movie, or The American Rabbit or something, then when he refuses, sneaks into the recording room, tries to make his own review show, but fucks all the settings on his equipment.
 
I've said it before and I'll say it again:
I'd watch a sitcom based on the concept of Barb dying and Chris tracking Cole down in NYC and moving in against Cole's wishes.
Prime TV there.

Sounds like some kind of crazy stunt to be progressive. "Next season a new main character is joining the cast. Cole's estranged half brother moves in with him. It's Chris, the female identified transgender who also has autism, and deals with online bullying."
 
Sounds like some kind of crazy stunt to be progressive. "Next season a new main character is joining the cast. Cole's estranged half brother moves in with him. It's Chris, the female identified transgender who also has autism, and deals with online bullying."
I'd say it would be a jump the shark moment but your life would have to be interesting before then for that to happen.
 
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