Tabletop Roleplaying Games (D&D, Pathfinder, CoC, ETC.)

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I expect the next edition of D&D to go completely down the shitter because Wizards bends their asses over to the biggest of mentally ill mongoloids who know next to nothing about tabletop gaming. Here's hoping that Hasbro does the right thing and tells them to fuck off.
 
I expect the next edition of D&D to go completely down the shitter because Wizards bends their asses over to the biggest of mentally ill mongoloids who know next to nothing about tabletop gaming. Here's hoping that Hasbro does the right thing and tells them to fuck off.

I mean, WotC wouldn't be the first company to make a shitty, pandery product which pisses off the sane members of their core audience, lose a bunch of money, and continue to grandstand about their own wokeness in spite of the financial incentives against doing that. Idk, maybe Hasbro will keep them in line, but I wouldn't be surprised if they don't. I think we're going to reach a point soon where the only way to really avoid this annoying nonsense will be for sane people to find small groups of like-minded players, make their own fun with the existing game systems, and ignore the larger consumer culture surrounding the major ttrpg properties.
 
Guys check out this cool campaign for HP Lovecraft themed dices!
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D&D is going to get much worse. Here is what I picture an interview looking like at an undisclosed time in the near future:

Interviewer:
Well Carl, tell us about the upcoming edition of D&D. I hear you and your team have been making lots of changes and we're all eager to hear about them.



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Carl:
Well we're redoing Dungeons and Dragons from the ground up. The previous editions are very problematic. None of them were very inclusive at all so we're going to fix that right here and now with the 6th edition. We removed quiet a few unsavory elements from the game.

Interviewer:
Oh? Can you give a few examples of this

Carl:
Certainly. Race was such a terrible concept and only white supremacists so we renamed that to species and all the different species are equal. No difference between their abilities or anything.

Interviewer:
So no difference in stats or anything that effects game play at all?

Carl:
We don't have stats anymore either. The last thing you want to do when you're having a good time is a lot of math so those numbers were removed. You just state to everyone what your character is good at.

Interviewer:
Then how does the DM determine if someone fails or succeeds at something? How does the flow of combat go?

Carl:
First of all we changed what that role does. It is no longer a dominant role like you would see in a white male run society but, me get back to that in a minute.
Second we don't use the word Dungeon Master anymore since Master comes from the time of slaves. We call this person the Narrator. In the 6th Edition you tell the narrator what you want to do and they make it happen. No more dice roles and numbers. You just say out loud what you want to do. For example if the narrator tells you that you see a dragon flying above your party, you can just say that your warrior jumps up super high and slashes the dragon in the neck and kills it. Then the narrator needs to make that happen. That's how it works in the 6th edition. Much easier than dice roles and much more fair.

Interviewer:
That certainly does sound like a drastic change. It sounds like the game is being slimmed down and streamlined. Are there going to be less classes? Does this mean the Player's hand book and Dungeon mast... I mean Narrator's Guide are going to be shorter?

Carl:
Less classes, yes. We're really not focused on them that much. I mean there's a warrior, witch and, Wanderer class but, if you feel like it you can add more if you want but, it's not something we're focusing on. Now, for the books they're going to be bigger than the previous versions. We have a brand new setting. The most advanced nation in this setting is called Onotombu. it is inspired by Black Panther's Wukanda. It is an afro-centric socialist nation ruled by a long proud line of queens. The latest queen is a non-binary trans woman who doesn't take shit from anyone. Her people love her and everyone is treated equally under her.
On the side of evil is the Orange Kingdom. it is a terrible place to live and is ruled over by an evil orange man. He hates anyone who isn't a straight white male. They try to kill people of color all the time but, they're not very good at it. They also are a backwards nation that is far behind all the other nations. They steal technology from other places and claim it as their own. They can't invent anything either.
We also have a lot of lessons on white privileged and toxic masculinity that we sprinkle throughout the book and how these can be integrated into your story. There are also pages that tell the players on where and how they can educate themselves on these concepts. Dungeons and Dragons doesn't have to be just a game but, it can be a lesson too!

Interviewer:
So how do games in the new system typically go? It sounds very different from any of the previous editions of the game.

Carl:
Good Question. During play testing I was a part of a group that was made up of a transwoman, non-binary woman, male person of color and myself. In the game the party was two witches, a warrior and a wanderer. We were in one of the plazas in Onotombu. Then a strange man approached us. He started talking and misgendered one of the witches. It was pretty horrifying but, then the witch cast a spell and revealed that this man was from the Orange Kingdom. She walked up to him and punched him and he died. Afterwards we had a huge party where everyone was invited!

Interviewer:
Sounds interesting.
I think that about wraps it up. I bet tons of people are looking forward to the 6th Edition!
 
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D&D is going to get much worse.

Is that even possible?

Second we don't use the word Dungeon Master anymore since Master comes from the time of slaves. We call this person the Narrator. In the 6th Edition you tell the narrator what you want to do and they make it happen. No more dice roles and numbers. You just say out loud what you want to do. For example if the narrator tells you that you see a dragon flying above your party, you can just say that your warrior jumps up super high and slashes the dragon in the neck and kills it. Then the narrator needs to make that happen. That's how it works in the 6th edition. Much easier than dice roles and much more fair.

Are these rules supposed to be a downgrade? Freeforms are great.
 
Are these rules supposed to be a downgrade? Freeforms are great.
Why do you even need rules then nigga, if I'm buying a book of rules then I want lots of nice and meaty rules. I don't need to spend money on a hundred pages of the author telling me to play pretend. Oh god my GURPS faggotry is showing isn't it
 
I offhandedly wish some weapons got more official attention, or some better feat support for working them in. This comes during the tail end of my lunch so consider it more like stream of consciousness.

Mainly what I'm talking about are throwing weapons. I'd kill for boomerang variants that give you a check for catching it on the return in exchange for better overall damage. Or more magic items like that old Glove of Throwing Knives or whatever.

Hell I may just run that by a DM in a future game. Gimme an outback themed, Spores circle druggy Druid with a boomerang using club stats, but it counts for use with Shillelagh.
My GM enjoys adding new weapons into D&D. We've used chakram and kusarigama for instance. As far as creating feats, he's still wary of that but is open to reflavoring the "minus 5 to hit but plus 10 damage" types of feats with alternate weapons. Me and my fellow players really want the feat from 3.5e that lets you wield a two handed weapon with one hand but so far no luck.

Also I'm trying to write a poem that's a clue to the final dungeon when the pieces are put together. I'm realizing I suck at poetry.
 
Im finally trying out D&D 3.5th edition for the first time, and it's a Gestalt party. Here's the story I wrote out for my Lesser Aasimar Knight/Spontaneous Caster Cleric (this build was sponsored by the 3rd Party Lost Tradition feat).
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Though others would claim that the Dawnblade family was descended from the heavens, no one seriously thought that the oldest son of Kristoff Dawnblade would be an Aasimar. Oliver Dawnblade came from a long line of paladins that fought for the faith of Heironeous, god of valor, chivalry, justice, honor, war, and daring. Being both an Aasimar and the oldest son of a paladin, Oliver was expected to follow in the family business. Luckily, ever since he was a boy, Oliver wanted to become a paladin just like his father.

As a boy, Oliver was popular among his male classmates. His classmates seemed drawn to him in a way that even his spirit, friendliness, and playfulness couldn’t completely account for. He also was strong, and beat many of his peers in games of strength, such as wrestling and foot racing. Despite this, he still remained scrawny, which caused many of the older children to bully him, usually in groups and when Oliver least expected it. This made him especially sensitive to this supposed weakness. Additionally, even today, he is slow to pick up on new concepts. He would often need more complicated topics explained to him slowly and simply. One of his closest friends was an older child named Perrin. The two were in constant friendly competition, and they both shared the same dream of becoming a paladin. Though Perrin was lowborn, his strength was second only to Oliver, and Perrin was slightly more intelligent than his friend.

As Oliver got older, so did his father. As Kristoff lay on his deathbed, one of the few paladins who died a peaceful death, he gave Oliver permission to train with his Manfred, a man who was practically a brother to Kristoff and an uncle to Oliver, and was still a paladin despite getting up there in years. Kristoff also put in a good word for Perrin, recognizing his strength and mind. Though Manfred was a good teacher, he was also a harsh one who made training as harrowing as he could in order to weed out the weak, the dumb, the lazy, and the otherwise incapable. Though Oliver was not the brightest of his peers, his strength, his determination, and his faith in Heironeous, instilled in him at a young age, kept him going throughout the years. Eventually, Oliver became a full blown squire under Kristoff.

One of Heironeous’s greatest enemies was Hextor, his villainous six-armed brother and the god of tyranny, war, discord, massacres, conflict, and fitness. As such, paladins of Heironeous were expected to root out his wicked faith through any means necessary within the guidelines of their strict code of honor. Indeed, many battles drew to a halt, soldiers on both sides gawking when the strongest knights, paladins, and clerics of the two gods dueled to the death in single combat.

One day, Oliver and Perrin, the former still a squire and the latter only recently a paladin, were sparring in the woods when they came across a lone half-ogre, a large, dim-looking man clad in spiked, ebony armor, with Hextor’s holy symbol branded onto his left cheek. He didn’t even have a flail, the signature weapon of Hextor worshippers. Instead, his weapons were his gauntleted fists. Perrin confidently challenged the half-ogre to a duel. The half-ogre gave him a look. Then, to Oliver’s shock and terror, he lifted Perrin by the hair up to eye level before casually plucking his arms off, as if he were pulling a flower from the soil. Perrin’s screams of agony and fear only stopped when the boy was thrown onto the ground.

Grief-stricken and enraged by his friend’s sudden death, Oliver challenged the ogre to a duel, throwing his sword down onto the floor to make the duel honorable. The half-ogre accepted. He did not expect his foe to beat him so brutally, nor did he expect him to toy with Oliver like a cat with a mouse. Eventually, Oliver was so badly beaten that he could not even walk anymore. The half-ogre then proceeded to tear off the Aasimar’s armor, leaving him naked in front of the ogre. Then, he brutalized him some more, taunting him about his friend, his scrawniness, his foolishness in challenging him, and his constant cries of fear, humiliation, and agony. Finally, just as Oliver felt his life fading away, the half-ogre brought him back from the brink, keeping him only barely alive and with his legs still broken. As the half-ogre walked away, taking Oliver’s clothes with him, he turned to him and said, “Give Manfred my regards.” Oliver was left to crawl, crying and bleeding all the while, until he made it to the temple. Though his physical wounds were healed by the temple’s clerics, he had mentally shut down for days afterwards, simply staring off into space and trembling as the image replayed in his mind. This attack was one of the only times his faith in Heironeous had ever faltered.

When he finally snapped out of his nervous exhaustion, Manfred announced that he would avenge the two youths. Oliver went with him, wishing to back his mentor and father figure up in case foul play was at hand. The two came across the half-ogre about to attack the local lord’s children. Enraged by this display, Manfred challenged the half-ogre to a duel, both to allow the kids to escape and to allow Perrin’s soul to be put to rest. Though he battled valiantly, in the end, he was no match for the cruelty and strength of The Titan of Hextor. Seeing his mentor’s body lay broken on the floor and seeing the half-ogre’s vicious grin, Oliver could do nothing but run from The Titan of Hextor. A few days later, their temple had a closed casket funeral for the two paladins.

His faith in Heironeous nearly broken and his confidence completely shattered, Oliver left the temple and ventured out on his own, doing small mercenary jobs for money. While he was fighting some goblins one time, he noticed his old holy symbol, which he kept for sentimental reasons, glowing. With an instinctive wave of his hand, he was able to heal his allies, to protect his allies, and to strengthen his allies. Though he still wept in his sleep sometimes from the memory of The Titan of Hextor, and he still cringed when he heard rumors about the powerful half-ogre, it seemed Heironeous was not yet ready to give up on him. This was enough to not only give him hope for the future, but to restore his lost optimism.
Thoughts? I also the reference pic that best represented an Aasimar psuedo-paladin with high charisma, strength, and constitution while still being skinny enough to be made fun of by others, most notably those that follow the God of Fitness. The only thing I had trouble weaving in was his complete awkwardness with the other sex, to the point where he would have genuine trouble attacking female villains that weren't some kind of fiend or undead, and have a hard time striking up romantic relationships should they come up. Though that's probably a given, considering he's entering a career women don't really go into, for a god that emphasizes chivalry towards women.

Edit: My other party members are a Half-Dragon Half-Human Sorcerer and an Elan Void Disciple/Conscript
 
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D&D is going to get much worse. Here is what I picture an interview looking like at an undisclosed time in the near future:

Interviewer:
Well Carl, tell us about the upcoming edition of D&D. I hear you and your team have been making lots of changes and we're all eager to hear about them.



View attachment 1506078
Carl:
Well we're redoing Dungeons and Dragons from the ground up. The previous editions are very problematic. None of them were very inclusive at all so we're going to fix that right here and now with the 6th edition. We removed quiet a few unsavory elements from the game.

Interviewer:
Oh? Can you give a few examples of this

Carl:
Certainly. Race was such a terrible concept and only white supremacists so we renamed that to species and all the different species are equal. No difference between their abilities or anything.

Interviewer:
So no difference in stats or anything that effects game play at all?

Carl:
We don't have stats anymore either. The last thing you want to do when you're having a good time is a lot of math so those numbers were removed. You just state to everyone what your character is good at.

Interviewer:
Then how does the DM determine if someone fails or succeeds at something? How does the flow of combat go?

Carl:
First of all we changed what that role does. It is no longer a dominant role like you would see in a white male run society but, me get back to that in a minute.
Second we don't use the word Dungeon Master anymore since Master comes from the time of slaves. We call this person the Narrator. In the 6th Edition you tell the narrator what you want to do and they make it happen. No more dice roles and numbers. You just say out loud what you want to do. For example if the narrator tells you that you see a dragon flying above your party, you can just say that your warrior jumps up super high and slashes the dragon in the neck and kills it. Then the narrator needs to make that happen. That's how it works in the 6th edition. Much easier than dice roles and much more fair.

Interviewer:
That certainly does sound like a drastic change. It sounds like the game is being slimmed down and streamlined. Are there going to be less classes? Does this mean the Player's hand book and Dungeon mast... I mean Narrator's Guide are going to be shorter?

Carl:
Less classes, yes. We're really not focused on them that much. I mean there's a warrior, witch and, Wanderer class but, if you feel like it you can add more if you want but, it's not something we're focusing on. Now, for the books they're going to be bigger than the previous versions. We have a brand new setting. The most advanced nation in this setting is called Onotombu. it is inspired by Black Panther's Wukanda. It is an afro-centric socialist nation ruled by a long proud line of queens. The latest queen is a non-binary trans woman who doesn't take shit from anyone. Her people love her and everyone is treated equally under her.
On the side of evil is the Orange Kingdom. it is a terrible place to live and is ruled over by an evil orange man. He hates anyone who isn't a straight white male. They try to kill people of color all the time but, they're not very good at it. They also are a backwards nation that is far behind all the other nations. They steal technology from other places and claim it as their own. They can't invent anything either.
We also have a lot of lessons on white privileged and toxic masculinity that we sprinkle throughout the book and how these can be integrated into your story. There are also pages that tell the players on where and how they can educate themselves on these concepts. Dungeons and Dragons doesn't have to be just a game but, it can be a lesson too!

Interviewer:
So how do games in the new system typically go? It sounds very different from any of the previous editions of the game.

Carl:
Good Question. During play testing I was a part of a group that was made up of a transwoman, non-binary woman, male person of color and myself. In the game the party was two witches, a warrior and a wanderer. We were in one of the plazas in Onotombu. Then a strange man approached us. He started talking and misgendered one of the witches. It was pretty horrifying but, then the witch cast a spell and revealed that this man was from the Orange Kingdom. She walked up to him and punched him and he died. Afterwards we had a huge party where everyone was invited!

Interviewer:
Sounds interesting.
I think that about wraps it up. I bet tons of people are looking forward to the 6th Edition!

At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if this was an actual announcement press release for 6th Edition D&D.

If WOTC keeps going woke with D&D, I expect 6th Edition to bomb even harder than 4th Edition

Still, I don't see a new edition coming out until 2022 at the absolute earliest, and depending on how the remainder of 2020 plays out, Woke Leftism might no longer be in vogue.

If I were in charge of Hasbro, I'd fire the bulk of the wokesters at Wizards, officially retcon all the recent changes made for 5th Edition in the last two years and then work on a 6th Edition for the 50th Anniversary of D&D in 2024.
 
I've seen some more questioning of this thought recently. A youtube channel did some experiments with a Joe Gibbs (a 200 pound longbow shooter), Will Sherman (a period fletcher) and Kevin Legg (a period armourer). The arrow shattered on impact against a breastplate that would have been used in Agincourt. So an actual arrow is unlikely to pierce through the high quality armor.

It is undisputed that longbow archers played a huge role in the battle and the evolution of warfare, but we may been overestimating how much damage they can do to the heavier armors.
Maybe double check that link? Unless Rekieta is secretly a mideval warfare expert leading those three.

From what I read* they where mostly able to pierce the limbs rather than the breastplate. Which should have done plenty to take out the enemy.

*Unlike the chick up there I have no qualms about just reading wikipiedia and calling it a day.
A very well made and enjoyable video. I would agree with @WinchesterPremium that it was primarily about those lucky shots hitting the unarmored or more poorly armored parts of the enemy, as well as the more poorly armored people. I think it's also just the fact that there were always arrows in the air harassing the enemy, which can be demoralizing and mentally draining. The guy in the video mentioned that when he was shot with an arrow in armor, even though it didn't go through it still hurt.
Not to rain on you guys' parade (really, it's interesting), but have you considered the prospect that the archers were shooting at the knights' horses?
 
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